Showing posts with label Evilness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Evilness. Show all posts
Apr 3, 2013 | By: A Woman

What is care really? Day 340

Continuing with the Question Who is Responsible for our Children's Education?

 

When going through the news headlines and seeing the craziness humanity is suffering from, it is clear that Real Care does not exists in this world. One can blame the world system, the education system, the neighbours, the living conditions, you name it; however, if we look in self honesty, we would see that we were the ones who created the system that allows such madness; we would start seeing our responsibility from the perspective that what ever we now see accelerating around the world, is the exact duplicate of the nastiness, madness and evilness that exists in our minds. For more context, I suggest reading Why Changing the World start with Self - Day 311 and Facing the Evil within - the KEY to Self Awareness - Day 188.

 

Now, if we look back at the original question: Who is Responsible for our Children's Education? it is safe to say that if Real Care for one's children was existing, us, as Parents in this world, would have make sure that our children would be and become the best they could be within a very specific guideline of:

- Give as you would like to receive.

- Do unto another as you would like to be done unto you.

Making sure that our Children would be the best they can be within these above guidelines, would have resulted with a world that is best for all where Madness and Craziness would be non existent; where Poverty and Crime would no longer exists; War and Abuse would be something that we couldn't even grasp to be existing in our harmonized world. Which by the way, if we look at the word: 'Harmony' we would find 2 fascinating things within the sounding of the word:

1. Harmony - No Harm ->When Harmony is truly applied, there is no Harm.

2. Harm Money -> Money is the Root of all Harm isn't it?

 

HOWEVER - we cannot do it unless we understand what Real Care Imply; what Give as you would like to receive and Do unto another as you would like to be done unto you, is practically implies on a Best For all application and consideration; we cannot do it unless we understand our own Mind, our own Programming, our own reactions, thoughts, and automated behaviours and unless we walk our own process of Rebirthing ourselves as Life that is honourable, we would pass on to our children, our own generational sins without even realizing that we do so.

 

So here is to remind ourselves that there is no one to blame, not even ourselves and from here, all we have to do is to move directly to the Correction that is required to stop repeating the same generational patterns that had led us to create a world of Madness in its absolute glorification.

If you haven't already, I suggest reading through the Blog series: The correction Process and the Desteni Message as a 101 guidelines to understand what Programming Is, How we program ourselves, the difference between Honesty and Self Honesty, what does it mean to correct and change ourselves and why, etc.

 

If you are already ready to start investigating and introspecting yourself in all the level of the minds, I suggest walking the Free On-Line DIP Lite Course and start your process of Establishing the basic tools for Self Correction and Realization so that you could become the Seed of Life that would bring about Harmonized Life as a Living example.

 

Dec 17, 2012 | By: A Woman

Don't you Dare Giving me this look - Day 248

 

This is continuation to:

Don't you Dare Blaming me - Day 244

Don't you Dare Manipulating me - Day 245

 

DSC00611I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to React to other beings Facial Expression that I perceived to be an expression of Spite/ anger/disguised that is directed and in relation to their experience of me. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that their inner experience has nothing to do with me directly but what they have accepted and allowed within and as themselves and thus, when I accept the change in their facial expression through associating a past memory of someone being angry/spiteful/disguised, and make it personally, I, in that moment, validating their experience and disempowering/diminishing/compromising myself as I take their experience that they have accepted and allowed themselves to participate with and make it my own.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand the other human being process, in unconditionally seeing the being as who they are, their Life Path, the Process they have walked and accordingly, assist and support, in self honesty, and in alignment to 'Give as you'd like to Receive', but rather, I have accepted and allowed myself to react to their reactions, make it personally and access a mind possession that I could have prevented, simply through/as/within breath.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to Believe myself when I interpret another Facial Expression through my own mind, through my own knowledge and information database that I have collected, stored and accumulated throughout my life  and according to that, come to the conclusion that the other is in a reaction towards me, and thus, I must embrace now the Defense Mode Character that I have also created within and as myself and to  then thus, interact and communicate from a Mind starting point as how I would perceive to be the best tactic that would result in "peace" with the other human being and within that, for not just moment consider the other human being and their life path and their processes because I was to occupied in my own mind, separating myself not only from myself but from the other and within that, failed to stand by my own commitment to assist and support myself to Stop participating with my own mind as I already seen, realized and understood that nothing worthwhile can manifest from one's participation of one's mind.

 

I commit myself to assist and support myself in getting to the bottom of all points of reaction to other human beings within and as myself and to walk, slowly but surly, from Mind Reaction to Prevention as I already see the outcome when accepting and allowing myself to participate in Reaction and how in those moments, I completely disempowered myself and compromised myself and the other.

 

I commit myself to investigate my own body Language and my own facial expressions and within that, assist and support myself with communicating with the being in my environment, asking them how my face changes in specific moments so that I'll have a reference point for and as myself and in this - Not accepting and allowing myself to react and take myself personally when and as they showing me that which I wasn't seeing before. Through this, I develop open and intimate communication with others, in an agreement to assist and support ourselves to expand and grow ourselves, in getting to know ourselves and each other so that, instead of diminishing and disempower each other, we stand as support and accordingly, grow, expand and empower ourselves.

 

 

I commit myself to Stop making assumptions, perceptions and therefore conclusions and to stop believing the conclusion I come to within and through the mind as I see, realize and understand that following my mind, and reacting to what I see through my eyes, does not and will not result with an outcome that is worth while. Thus, I commit myself to - When and as I see that another had changed their facial expression, I stop, I breathe, and I make sure that I'm Here, within and as my human physical body, I touch my hand to support me with grounding myself and once I'm clear, I direct myself in that moment.

Dec 15, 2012 | By: A Woman

Derren Brown Expose - Crowed behaviour is Evil - Day 246

 

 

I just finished watching Derren Brown - The Gameshow and frankly what Derren showed on a micro-cosmos level, is exactly how humanity as a whole works and functions as a crowd - Directly and indirectly through our collective silent acceptance of this world system. But before I'll explain, let's review the show in a nutshell.

 

In this show, Derren Brown did an experiment on a crowd that had no idea they are the subject of the experiment but rather they believed that they are participants on a new TV show.

What the Crowd had to do, anonymously, was to vote/decide the fate of another human being that had no clue that everyone around him involves and play/act according to the crowd decisions.

The Crowd always had 2 choices the vote from: A. Positive Outcome; B. Negative Outcome.

Each time, the crowd chose the Negative outcome without considering that a man's life is in stake and what would be the traumatic consequences this may lead to.

 

Since Derren Brown knew, and could easily anticipate what the crowd will chose each time, he decided to prepare a fake part in case the crowd in fact decides to embarrass their Evil Nature in its totality, to prevent the harm/injury of the being that was the scapegoat of the crowd decisions.

 

When the fake part took place, and the being merely killed when a car ran over him, Derren Brown exposed the true Evil Nature of human beings when and as they are acting anonymously and decide the fate of another human being without ever looking at themselves, looking at the consequences and outflows and not only that, cheering all the way through the Evil decisions they have made. The more Negative experience the being had and the more serious outcome it led to, the more the crowd cheered up.

 

(I suggest watching it for yourself, for a better impression of what human beings are capable of.)

 

When I read the reviews of this show, done by Psychologists, it was interesting to see how to Psychologist tried to diminish Brown's experiment by claiming that the experiment wasn't done properly despite of them being familiar with Crowd Behaviour:

 

"...Why is all this important? Does it really matter to anyone other than social psychologists that outdated theory is portrayed as factual on prime-time television? The point is that an understanding of crowd psychology has important consequences for society. Regarding crowds as anti-social entities acting without identity or reason can legitimate their violent repression by security forces, prevent intragroup helping in emergencies, and facilitate the dismissal of popular protest as irrational by those in positions of power. Poor theory can therefore ultimately lead to both public disorder, and an attack upon our democratic rights as individuals to express our views collectively. It is therefore in all of our interests to gain an accurate understanding of crowd behaviour, rather than rely upon outdated theory that is not only wrong, but dangerous.."

 

So, what is the Democratic Right as Individual to Express our Views collectively?

There is only ONE right that can be Valid within this context and that is the Right to a Life that is best for all. Throughout History, there wasn't once that a crowd stood up and expressed their Right for a world that is best for all COLLECTIVELY and yet, we have the right to do so. What we did stood for was for Lynches, Wars, Crucifixions and so on.

 

Where is our Individual Expression as a collective when we as the Individuals accepting and allowing the Collective Consequences that manifested in this world? Here is a part of Lindsay Craver Blog that is relevant to this discussion:

 

...Each day that I walk the Learned Helplessness Character in writing and in living-correction is another day that I peel back yet another layer and get to see with more clarity just how important it is to eradicate every single acceptance of helplessness within myself and equally within this world. I do not and cannot accept myself nor this world to cower under a pressure that isn’t even real, but is self-induced as a way to try/attempt to get out of standing accountable, because one single 20 year old did not shoot and kill all those children today, one single soldier did not ever drop a bomb on a village full of children, one single man did not make a decision to starve entire countries – we ALL pulled the trigger, we ALL dropped the bomb, and we ALL withheld and continue to withhold vital resources from those who are in dire need – and indeed, to come to terms with this fact is one of the most difficult things that we will ever require to do as human beings, because to come to terms is to admit our wretchedness, is to admit that we are accomplices in acts of atrocious violence,  yet it is through admitting our inadequacies and total failures at being and becoming the potential that we are actually able to be, that we are able to have the courage and humility to stand corrected and to embrace the absolute shame for what we have done so that we can through this make absolute sure that not another child is robbed of life in any way, ever again...

 

Thus, It is Detrimental that we will become aware of our indirect Individual Expression as Collective in seeing, realizing and understanding what we are in fact expression and the consequences thereof. When we see a world of abuse where Children are born to a life of misery and yet we remain quite, our expression is of acceptance and allowance of the continuation of a world of abuse and suffering for the majority of the people.

 

We are Evil in Nature, regardless if we are in a crowd that supports our Evilness Nature or as an individual that sit on their asses and do nothing to change this world. Our Individual Expression in all times MUST be according to Principles that are best for all because otherwise, we are responsible for each and every outcome and consequences that exist within this world because we didn't stand up and stop, nor ourselves or this world to continue its cycle of abuse that we have accepted and allowed through our Individual expression.

 

The Focus of this show was to Expose Crowd behaviour and the cruelty Crowd behaviour can lead to. What was not exposed in this show is the Indirectly Crowd Behaviour of us human being, that have the means and power to change the fate of this world, to prevent the birth of children to a world of abuse and instead to prepare the way before them to birth into world that will take care of them, from birth till death.

Understand, our Silent Expression is still an expression of what we accept and allow and what we will not. The fact we do nothing to change the face of this world indicate our Evil Expression of Human Beings.

If you get what I'm saying, it is time you join the Crowd that is standing up for a world that is best for all, face your evil nature and change yourself to be and become an effective human being in this world that Express, in every moment of every breathe the Principle of Give as you'd Like to Receive and Love thy Neighbour as thyself. Investigate Equal Money System and the Desteni I Process.

 

 

Nov 29, 2012 | By: A Woman

Seeing the Evil Nature in Dreams - Day 229

This a continuation to:

From Evilness to Life - Day 226

The seclusion in Inclusion - Day 227

 

1075-dream-interpreter-life-reviewI had Quite a Vivid dream last night which was fascinating from the perspective that I had listen to the Life Review Interview - Dream Interpreter the day before, which was a great assistance and support in walking through the point that had opened up in the dream.

 

As was explained in the interview, Dreams are specific and represents one's Personalities Participation in one's day to day Living which Consciousness may imprint to the Dream Domain and through this, one could assist and support oneself to see what one require to further investigate within and as oneself and accordingly take responsibility and change from a Mind Personality to a Living Physical Expression of and as oneself.

 

In this Life Review, a man came through the Portal to share his life on Earth within his relationship to how he would interpret dreams and what he had Realized about himself and the Consequences of his actions on earth within his relationship to Dream interpretation after he had died and within that, how little did he actually understood about Dreams and their meanings.

 

It was suggested that one would look at one's reactions, behaviour, memories, past events, experiences etc. that came up in the dream because that will show the relationships that one haven't sorted out yet, within and as oneself.

 

So now that I'm working with the Evil Point within the last 3 days of writing, it was interesting that the Dream came up to show me another layer/dimension that I haven't looked at yet in self honesty, which I'm grateful for as I'm seeing within and as myself now that this unresolved point within me, is a key factor that is causing a friction and conflict within my relationship with another human being in my Physical Environment for more than 2 years now.

 

So - Within my relationship with this being, we had 2 past experiences wherein I perceived the being to betray me with getting involved with 2 males (in 2 separated occasions) that the being knew I was interested with. None one of these males where in alignment to where I was within my process and the chances of us actually getting to know each other and developing a stable and supportive relationship/agreement, were close to nothing, and yet, I still perceive the being to spite me and I started developing and growing resentment towards the being within and as myself, very slowly but surely.

 

I haven't face this point in writing till now but I see already that it is detrimental to face this point and correct myself because as long as I keep and hold onto this memory about this being, and the experience of being betrayed, I would not be able to stand in Equality with the being. What I've seen within and as myself was that, I would deliberately activate this memory of the experience of being betrayed in moments that I feel inferior within the relationship with the being and I would access this revenge that exists within me and would get the 'Power' to spite, and talk the being down through justifying to myself that I cannot trust them due to past event where they have hurt me.

 

In the Dream that I had, me and this being were in a camping park with lots of people around us, maybe watching a movie on a big screen or something and we saw a couple of friends of us, male and a female that were waving towards us to come over. The guy is someone that I knew in real life, a guy that I had a sex relationship a few years back. Our level of communication was abusive in nature where he would disrespect me in front of others and I would accept it because I had sex with him and I had to justify to myself that it is fine so that I would be able to continue having sex with him. In the dream, the being and I started walking towards the 2 friends and I've noticed that the being is planning to sit next to the guy and I felt a surge of jealousy, resentment and anger within me like: "what the fuck, why does she get to sit next to him, this is my guy". I can't remember which one of us set next to the guy but I remember I was talking to myself in calming myself down, reminding myself that this guy isn't someone that I even want to be with but I felt the competition in walking to them faster so that I could win and get what I wanted before the being could take the guy away from me again.

 

When I woke up and looked at the dream, investigating my reactions, the experience, the back chat, the thoughts, my expression, the way I behaved and so forth, it was clear that the past event of me feeling betrayed still affect my relationship with this being till this day, as there is a part of me that would not let it go and trust the relationship to stand when and as there is a male in the picture in particular but it also goes to the extent of which, I would not trust the being in other instances and would always keep a certain distance so that I wouldn't get hurt again.

 

It was fascinating because this part of me that wouldn't let go, the part that would keep the need to revenge to protect myself, is the Evil personality that I've been working within the last few days and here I go, having a dream that is so specific that shows a point within and as myself that I was not willing to face before.

 

I will continue walking this point with a process of Self Forgiveness and Practical corrective application however, for today, here is an example of how to work with dreams in a practical way, as was explained in much more specificity within the Life Review - Dream Interpreter.

 

For those who are working with dreams or have worked in the past, I suggest listening to this interview as it would give some insights and points to consider when and as one work with dreams.

 

Nov 27, 2012 | By: A Woman

The seclusion in Inclusion - Day 227

This a continuation to:

From Evilness to Life - Day 226

 

For the context of this blog, Please read Earth's Journey to Life blog - "Birthing ourselves as life, as a partnership Part 11 - Understanding the reflection in the mirror - I feel excluded".

 

 

 

 

 

Here is an extraction from the blog:

 

"...The symbolism of seeing 2 people busy with something where I see myself as incapable of participating on their level – Now here ‘their level’ means that I do not see myself as capable of doing what they are doing – be that a form of socialising / work related / discussion related.

 

Firstly here to notice, is that I had judged myself as incapable of participating –which means that I had judged myself as ‘not good enough’ – But this judgment stands in comparison to these 2 other people. So – through me judging myself through comparison as to what it is that I see others are doing – I ‘exclude’ (separate) myself from what is happening, as I had made the decision and choice within and as myself that I am not capable (I judged myself). I am thus the one who ‘excluded’ myself from what was happening and by me not wanting to seeing that I had done this, I blame others ‘for excluding’ me, when it was in fact me excluding me for what was happening.

 

When we face points where we ‘feel’ excluded we are to investigate the nature of the situation as we create our own self fulfilling prophesies where we exclude ourselves (through our judgements) and then project these feelings of exclusion onto the people whom we excluded (judged) from ourselves…"

 

After I read Esteni's blog, I had a look within and as myself, whether or not, when and as I'm one of these 2 people, and I see the third being struggling within and as themselves with their own self judgement that was described, if there is any Evil Energetic Movement within and as myself, enjoying the fact that I am now More than within the other's eyes. 

 

I was not surprise to find within and as myself, the Dark Evil joyful character that I've created within and as myself, wherein, I've accepted and allowed myself to participate in the Superior/Inferior game that I played with the third being, within and as my resonance expression. In these moments, I wouldn't make an effort to include the third being and I would deliberately create a 'special relationship' with the second being so that the Third being would be jealous, judgemental towards oneself through comparing themselves to me.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to consider the beings in my direct environment and within that, how I'm directly responsible for how they would experience themselves wherein, I would deliberately accept and allow myself to create a friction and conflict within and as themselves through presenting to them a specific picture which they would be jealous at and activate jealousy towards me which would give me the experience of being More and Superior in my own mind. Within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to NOT considering all points, all relationship, all consequences and align these points/relationships/consequences within and as the principle of what is best for all and do onto another that which you'd like to be done to you wherein, instead of deliberately creating situation where I know that others would fall into their patterns and I would experience myself as More in comparison to their fall, to stand as a pillar of support for myself and others in walking WITH other human beings, as Equal, where we could learn from each other, expand, grow and empower ourselves and each other in walking together as ONE unit instead of Two or more enemies.

 

Thus, I commit myself to-  when and as I find myself in situations where I'm having a conversation with a person and there is another being in the room, accessing inferiority, self judgement and jealousy, I stop, I breathe and I look within and as myself in checking my own alignments in that moment, my starting point, energetic movement, what would be the best solution in consideration of all the relationship that exists within that moment and accordingly, align myself, align the situation in standing in absolute self honesty within and as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to form relationships and groups that exclude some beings and include only the "special" ones according to my 'likes' and/or my 'Preference', not seeing, realizing and understanding that my 'Likes' and 'Preferences' were created by me, according to a specific program design that I've accepted and allowed as myself, in separation of myself and that I've utilized these 'likes' and 'Preference' based on what would give me the best result outcome for an experience that I would be satisfied with, with no consideration regarding who am I stepping on, in the process of me getting the experience that I desire to have within and as myself.

 

In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what I accept and allow myself to participate in my direct environment, I accept and allow to exists in the world wherein, we created Groups, Cultures, Religion that Includes some and excludes others without realizing, understanding and directly seeing that unless we stand together as ONE group, united, within ONE principle of that which is best for all, there is no chance we would ever bring about a world that is Best for all living creatures.

 

And in this, I commit myself to assist and support myself in changing the way I view myself and this world, from a mind self interest dimension to a physical absolute and direct seeing of all the relationships, all the consequences, all the points that form our lives as a whole and to do so, I start with myself, in assisting and supporting myself to dissect all the Evil parts of myself that I've created, accepted and allowed within and as myself and bring myself to physical equal and one standing with all that is here through first stand in equal and one relationship with my own mind, expand myself in standing equal and one with the beings in my environment to then standing equal and one with the rest of existence.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to treat others in the very same way that I wouldn't want others to treat me, from a starting point of Spite, in self interest, to diminish them so that I could be More, not seeing, realizing and understanding that the reason why I wouldn't want to be treated in a specific behaviour by others is because I know, within and as myself the evilness that this behaviour is consisting of and existing as because I'm doing the same to others. And thus, instead of developing and establishing relationships that are based on mutual respect, understanding, expansion and growth, I create relationships that are based on pure Evil to elevate my own Experiences of being more on the backs of and the expanse of others. 

 

I commit myself to - when and as I see others reacting to me, to assess and check in self honesty whether or not I had a part in how they are experiencing themselves, whether or not I'm directly, and deliberately supporting their reaction so that I could experience myself as more and in doing so, I check and assess how I would react if I were in their shoes and accordingly, align the moment in the utmost supportive way in taking into consideration the consequences and outflows of each decision that I make.

Nov 26, 2012 | By: A Woman

From Evilness to Life - Day 226

There are moments in time where one sees what one is doing to another, what it is that one is deliberately accepting and allowing within and as oneself, one see’s how one's words and actions has an affect on others in harmful and destructive ways and yet, one would continue one's participation in one's design/program/pattern/character/personality and would never take responsibility for such moments in making sure that one would not accept and allow oneself to ever again harm oneself and other human beings in this world.

 

This is why I am now writing this blog as I've seen in myself the Evilness that exists within myself, that I've accepted and allowed to accumulate Evilness  over the years, without giving myself any constructive and supportive direction and as such, my actions, my words and my resonance outflows, may harm and cause damage to others as the only things that I would consider in such moments are ME and my Experiences and I would not consider the other beings at all. Till here no further.

 

This blog will be an overview of the points that I've seen within and as myself thus far and from here, I would go into more details and specifics in assisting and supporting myself in walking the path of standing Equal to and One as other human beings and within that, stand as a support rather than a machine that suck the life out from other beings to sustain my Ego/Personalities as how I've defined myself as 'who I am' in separation of myself, others and this world as a whole.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to desire to be so much more than another human being that within that, I would accept and allow myself to walk over their toes and smash them so completely, in making them so small within and as my mind so that I could remain in control over them which would give me the Experience that I'm More. Within that, I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to question myself as to why and how I have accepted and allowed the pattern/design as desire to be more, to exists within and as me and within that, haven't assisted and supported myself in stopping this pattern/design as the desire to be more and accordingly standing in alignment to the other being, in an assisting and supportive relationship instead of diminished and compromised relationship that would not benefit anything or anyone.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to try and attempt to make people so small in comparison to me, in my own mind, internally and externally and thus utilized all my "powers" as manipulation and defence tactics in doing all that I can so that they won't grow and expand themselves within who they are so that I won't have to stand in Equality with them but always remain more than them, in my own eyes but then, not seeing, realizing and understanding that I'm not only compromising them, but also compromising myself in  deliberately not assisting and supporting myself and others, equally as one to grow, expand and empower ourselves in becoming effective, trustworthy and respectful human beings in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to deliberately create and manifest relationships in my life with beings that I "see" and perceive as less than me so that I could always stand in a superior position, in control over them. Within that, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself when the Relationship Dynamic changes and the being is actually moving and changing themselves in assisting and supporting themselves to grow, expand and empower themselves within who they are, to react within and as myself because how I have defined myself as more and superior according to them, has now collapsed and I can no longer sustain the superior personality that I've created within and as myself. Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to assist and support myself in standing in absolute self trust as who I am, without needing/desiring/wanting to be More than who I am and specifically, in comparison to others.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see how Evil one can be and become, in how one would speak, move, behave to other human beings in one's world within and as oneself when and as one accept and allow oneself to deliberately manipulate oneself and one's relationships with other human beings, within the starting point of keeping the Relationship Dynamics as it always was in satisfying one's desire to define oneself according to a specific attribute or component that one perceive oneself as lacking within and as oneself through the other being.

 

I commit myself to STOP the Evilness that I've accepted and allowed within and as myself and within that, be aware of such moments where I would change my personality in the attempt to diminish others on my behalf, to sustain my own self created definition that I've defined myself as within my relationships with others.

 

I commit myself to assist and support myself in walking the process from Evilness to life that is best for all and within that, to investigate all the points within and as myself that I've accepted and allowed the Evil nature to override the principle of what is best for all life.

 

I commit myself to Re-Establish my relationships with other people in my world and direct myself within the relationships according to that which is best for all as a principle wherein, we transform the relationships to constructive and supportive where both would assist and support ourselves to grow, empower and expand ourselves as living beings instead of limit, compromise and diminish ourselves within who we are in our relationships to ourselves and each other.

 

I commit myself to investigate why and how I've created relationships that I could experience myself as superior and within that, its relationship to the polarized experience within and as myself, as inferior that I've attempted to suppress through creating relationship that would defined me externally, otherwise.

Nov 19, 2012 | By: A Woman

Impatience as Evilness - Day 219

This is a continuation to:

 

 

For the purpose of context, suggest reading these posts above prior to reading the post below, if you haven’t already. Here I will be walking the 'I don't have TIME' Character - Reaction Dimension - Practical support with Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments.

 

Reactions Dimension:

* Jealousy

* Frustration

* Irritation

* Anger

* Judgment and Self Judgment

* Impatient

* Self Pity

* Depression

* Anxiety

* Stress

 

----

 

Impatient

 

Girl Eaten by TreeI forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to access impatient towards anything and anyone in my environment, when and as I embodied the 'I don't have time Character' that I've created within and as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to project impatient towards others in my world wherein the words that I will use would be taint with Evil and Poison, within the attempt to brush them off, either externally directly to them, or internally, within and as my mind as back chat and internal conversations.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to wish that no one will talk to me, send me e-mails or ask me questions when I'm in the 'I don't have time' character, not seeing realizing and understanding that within that moment, I've separated myself form my entire existence, as if I'm the only one that is here, the only one that is busy and within that, the only one that is important and thus, whomever interrupt me or making noises, is lesser than me and not considering me and also annoying according to my eyes view, while the fact of the matter is that - I am the one that interrupt myself through participating within a reaction in my mind, having internal conversation with myself, as well as not being considerate towards others in my environment when I'm busy occupying myself in my mind, justifying why they are inconsiderate and annoying and within that, sees only ME without seeing them as who they are in that very specific moment.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be impatient towards others when they ask me questions while I'm busy with something else and thus, I would give them indirect answers, so that they would leave me alone as they would notice that I'm being impatient however, when they keep asking the same question because I didn't give them a direct answer, I become angry at them and even nasty towards them, in complete possession because apparently, they didn't consider me in that moment and haven't seen how busy I was. I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to speak directly in the moment, within assisting the being with what they asked me, in being as clear as possible which would make the entire process less time than what it would be, when I'm impatient and indirect.

 

 

The Ecstacy of Cecelia

I commit myself to not accept and allow myself to access Impatient behavioural mode as I now see, realize and understand how Evil one can become when and as one accept and allow oneself to direct oneself within impatient towards others.

 

I commit myself to - when and as someone is asking me a question that I see within and as myself that I have the answer and yet, I'm busy, I take a breath, I assess within and as myself whether there is any slightly movement of energy inside myself that can turn into evilness in the nature of impatient and if there is, I move through the energy, letting it go, earthing myself, clearing myself, and assist the being in a way that is clear and direct, and go back to do what ever I was busy with a moment ago.

 

For Further Support, please listen to : Life Review - A Life of Impatience

Nov 15, 2012 | By: A Woman

From the Bossy to the Loser - Day 215

This is a continuation to:

The Elite's delusion of stress - Part 1 - Day 45

The REAL Fear - Day 192

The Elite's Delusion of Stress - Part 2 - Day 46

The things we Won't tell ANYONE - Day 193

The Decision of TIME - Day 67

Missing out on the Good Life - Day 194

The Decision of TIME - Day 67

Let's have some Fun - Day 195

Copy Paste Character - The Education System - Day 184

Stupidity Loop - Jumping from the Bad to the Good to the Bad - Day 196

Is it possible to Cheat yourself? Day 185

The Smoke Screen of Ignorance - Day 197

It is time to STOP Existing as a Human Machine - Day 186

Leaving in a Dream - Day 208

The End of Times - Day 187

Having the Life Style you always dreamt to have - Day 209

Facing the Evil within - the KEY to LIFE - Day 188

IT is MY time Now - don't say a word - Day 210

Fear of Disappointing others - Day 189

Let's go on Vacation - Day 211

The Psychology of TIME - Day 190

Comparison is a Bitch - Day 212

I Regret, therefor, I'm a Good Person. NOT!!! - Day 191

Damn, I will never have everything done - Day 213

 

Standing as an Example - Self Interest or Self Realization? - Day 214

 

118078821450271719_WgRaR9GQ_cFor the purpose of context, suggest reading these posts above prior to reading the post below, if you haven’t already. Here I will be walking the 'I don't have TIME' Character - Internal Conversation/ back chat Dimension - Practical support with Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments.

 

Here, one must understand that the Back chat, are the source of all Evil wherein, what one accepting and allowing within oneself, within the belief that no one will ever find out, is nasty and evil shit. Therefor, I will be walking back chat by back chat, in making sure I purify myself from the Evil that I've accepted and allowed within myself, in the context of the ' I don't have Time' Character.

 

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Look at X - X is working much harder then me, X is studying, working, walking the responsibilities X committed to, sleeping for 2-3 hours - if X can do it, I must do it and stop complaining.

 

Within this backchat my starting point is still in comparison that was activated within a reaction towards the idea/opinion that I don't have enough time. Thus, instead of utilizing X as an Example and within that reminding myself that there is an example that I can learn from and perfect myself to stand as Equal to this being, I participated in this backchat from the starting point of calming myself down, after a series of previous backchat that were more self destructive in nature.

 

As I've mentioned in my Previous blog - Standing as an example doesn't mean standing as more or less than anyone else, standing as an example is a self expression within the realization of: This is who I am, this is why I am here and this is how I decide to walk my life in assisting and support myself as others within the principle of Give as You would Like to Receive and as I received the Gift of having people in my Life that are standing as an example of what I could be and become, I make the decision for and as myself to walk my Own process in becoming that which I can become and so, as I walk my process, I'm Giving that which I received by standing as Example as an expression of myself.

 

114912227962929884_Nm9Z12fs_bI forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe that having a backchat within the nature of calming self down is Valid and within that, haven't realized how I've manipulated myself within the belief that calming myself down through Thoughts is supportive and accordingly haven't investigated the nature of the backchat, what is behind the backchat and what is the backchat imply regarding to who I am within that moment. I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that calming myself down with thoughts is still done within a reaction and not in complete and absolute self movement of seeing what I have accepted and allowed myself to participate with and to accordingly, as I see, realize and understand the point, moving through this, bring myself here, BREATHE and keep on going. 

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to a being that I perceive to be better than me, as a motivator Key to how I would move and direct myself through Thoughts within and as myself, not seeing, realizing and understanding that this being is simply an example of self movement that shows me that once a decision is made in absolute self honesty and clarity, self is effective within and as oneself which reflect in what one do, as an expression of who one is.

 

In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see the starting point within having a comparative back chat within and as myself and its relationship to the Diminishment character that I've created within and as myself wherein, I've Utilized a comparison point to "Remind" myself how I'm not good enough because there are others who are better than me and thus, I must not complain and simply do the work. In that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see how through calming myself down in such away, through suppressing the 'I don't have time' Character, I had Shifted to the 'Diminishment Character' instead of assisting and supporting myself in standing within and as myself, so absolute and directive, in letting all of this Go, Breathe and move on.

 

A suggested reading to clarify the relationship between comparison and self diminishment:

The Self Diminishment Character - Day 94

They are Better than me, I'm so fucked up - Day 95

Taking responsibility for my creation - Day 96

 

" I don't understand how Y is doing what she is doing; I mean seriously, she is like a super woman.

What the fuck is wrong with me? why can't I simply apply myself breath by breath and have things done? Why I'm always complaining and blaming and being jealous.

 

What is "Wrong" with me is now the 'Diminishment' Character in full action that I had accepted and allowed myself to access to and give all my power away. So here, Despite of me noticing within and as myself that I compare, and complain, and blame and all of it through Jealousy, I still accept and allow this energy, this possessed entity to exists within and as me.

 

88101736431740622_wjX5RU1o_bSo, being so all mighty in my Previous back that that was discussed in Standing as an Example - Self Interest or Self Realization? - Day 214, to comparing myself to X, I slowly but surely went from the Polarity of being superior towards those that I've diminished in my mind, those that I had defined as ineffective in comparison to my "effectiveness", I now went into the other polarity, seeing my ineffectiveness in comparison to X and then I conclude that I'm worthless through the comparison to Y - that is how the Diminishment Character works and functions which I again suggest reading (Day 94-96)

 

I Commit myself to assist and support myself to STOP bouncing from one character to the other through NOT accepting and allowing myself any backchat whatsoever within and as my mind. I understand that it is going to take a process of Breath Accumulation and so, I commit myself to Remain Humble within and as myself, to not accept and allow myself to judge and be hard on myself and to simply, walk the layers of the mind, as it reveal itself, slowly but Surely.

 

I Commit myself to establish Self Respect within and as myself and to stop Diminishing myself and others within and as my mind as I see, realize and understand the Evil that exists within and as the Diminishment of others and I now walk the correction, Stop Comparing, competing, judging and spiting other people and myself, within and as my mind. Thus, When and as I see a backchat comes up, where I compare, judge, diminish and spite myself and others, I stop, I breathe, Delete and move on. I see, realize and understand that temptation would come and it is up to me to decide, in any given moment of breath whether I respect myself and others in self honesty, or whether I accept and allow the Evil nature of me to take over in absolute possession and so - I commit myself to assist and support myself to Decide, over and over and over again, to stand as Life until I no longer require to remind myself as I'm the living expression of Life that is best for all.