And again… - Day 276

Today I've noticed an interesting Design that I've accepted and allowed myself to participate with. In the last few days, I was resonantly possessed. I didn't slow myself down enough to specify the possession in assisting and supporting myself to step out of it and thus, it had slowly but surely accumulated till there was no more excuses and justification to not sort this out.

 

It all started last week when we had a power cut for 3 days and I couldn't participate with my regular daily responsibilities which caused a lag throughout this week, after the power came back. I'm still pushing to catch up on all the points but I haven't got to everything because my normal routine is quite hectic in itself and to add to this 3 days of no work is almost impossible but absolutely doable.

 

Yesterday, around the evening, the possession started kicking in  but I was so busy that I couldn't find a moment to investigate it properly. I had an idea of what it is all about but I haven't made the directive decision to in fact step out of it but instead, decided to suppress it for a moment without considering the consequences that would manifest with such deliberate suppression.

 

I woke up today in tremendous irritation to the extent of reacting to whom ever was in my direct view. It didn't take long to see that the possession is now very much defined and has to do with self validation.

In my mind, I started to Compare myself to others, trying to justify why I should feel sorry for myself and how unfair it is that I don't have a moment for myself for more than a week. I blamed myself for the decisions that I made throughout the week and the Extra Responsibilities that I took on. When I realized that I'm busy comparing, I directed myself to STOP but, it came up again. And so I stopped again, and it came up again. It was round about 3-4 hours until I could STOP in a moment of absolute decision to stop. 

 

I reminded myself that I've seen this character before, that I've walked the entire personality system in specificity and thus, it was time to apply the Practical corrective application and to literally Stop. But it didn't stop because I've missed a point/layer within this personality which is Competition for Self Validation.

 

Have a look at how manipulative is this design -

When I compared myself to others, I was actually competing with Others in my mind in looking at who is better than me, who is lesser than me; Who is Superior to me and who is Inferior to me; in that, I could place me on a polarity scale and stand in a position of being MORE than and accordingly, secretly accept myself as worthy. It was such a secret that I it didn't even make me feel better lol - I was still irritated, angry and frustrated.

(The story of how I practically assisted and supported myself to step out of the repetitive thought pattern will be shared in blogs to come as I see now that there is more to investigate and I require deep self introspection, which I will first walk for myself, in making sure that the pattern is in fact deleted and I haven't created another entity for myself.

 

What I am able share today is some rhetorical questions that I asked myself through which I could see the stupidity that I've accepted and allowed myself to participate with.

So I asked myself: how is it possible that you have placed yourself as more than in your own mind and yet, it didn't change the internal experience? What worth does superiority has if inside, I feel like shit, irritated, angry and frustrated? What does it shows about WHO I AM if and when I accept and allow myself to only validate me through competing and comparing myself to others? What does the back chat expose about my starting point of what I do as Who I am?

 

The reason why I used the word 'Rhetorical' is because the answers to these questions are very clear to me. The Real Questions that I'm yet to answer to myself in self honesty are WHY and HOW it is that I didn't stand as the directive principle, as a decision, as breath and STOP the participation in the thought pattern the first moment I saw myself accessing this time loop?

 

I'm aware and understand that there are Mind Systems that works in the background and support the possession that I was in. fine. I cannot use it as an excuse though and I will not justify myself through the systems because who if not me were the one who accepted and allowed such systems in the first place?

 

So, this blog is not the end of the story but the tip of the iceberg. It is up to me now to make sure I walk through this point because I really had enough from me repeating the same patterns that do not support myself and others in any way whatsoever.

So stay tuned as I commit myself to further expand on this point, first with myself and when I have absolute clarity, I'll share.

 

--

Note, the Mind system that I was referring to can be studied by listening to:  Quantum Mind - Self Awareness - Part 43 that was done yesterday, along with Quantum Systemization Repetitive Thought-Pattern Control System - Part 13

 

    

            

Unconditional Giving and Receiving or a Control System? - Day 269

 

 

I'm seeing lately more and more that I've created issues around the Principle of Give as you'd like to Receive which made me look more carefully and deeply into my starting point in relation to living principle of 'Give as you'd like to Receive'. Interestingly enough, the reactions that I experience are more in the context of the Receiver than the Giver however, what is more interesting is that the issues around the Receiver were actually derived from the issues around the Giver.

 

What I've noticed was that when I Receive, I experience discomfort in my body, like anxiety almost. It's like, the moment I receive, I immediately go into the thought domain where I would see all the potentials and possibilities for me to Give back as if now, I must Give something back and unless I Give, I can't fully stand stable, Here, enjoy the moment, breathe - because I must give back.

 

For instance - if let's say, someone is offering to give me a massage because I had back pain or because they discovered a new pressure point in their back and now they want to show me the point while massaging, I go into anxiety. It is very slight anxiety but very much constant. If for instance, someone offers me a coffee or something to eat, I would immediately start calculating whether I should accept it because maybe it means that the next time I make myself a cup of coffee or something to eat, I should ask anyone around me if they would like so too. Or if someone buys me a gift, or a small thing that they know I would be pleased with, the anxiety kicks in again. I would then start calculating how much money I have to be able to gift them something back. And in sex as well, I never really allowed myself to Enjoy being 'treated' because I believed I would have to give back and then, I would give back according to the amount of time that I received. Quite fucked up story.

 

When looking at this point as a design, or the origin of the Design, as everything - all start at home where parents give their children gifts and expect in return the child to either be a good child, to do what was asked them to do, to be who they are expected to be which within that, the Child, as the Receiver feel obligated to Give something back to the parents. Often, the child doesn't really want to do or become what the parent wants them to do, be and become, but they do want to receive the gifts/rewards despite them knowing the Consequences it involves. Slowly but surely the demand from the parents makes the child feel slight anxiety and discomfort that would fade away and suppressed. And so, the Parents would control the child through a rewards system in a disguised of Unconditional Giving and if at any point the child rebel, the parents would always remind the child about the rewards the child had received and all the things the parents did for the child throughout time as a manipulation tactic to bring the Rebellion child back in track.

 

(Will continue in my next blog)

The Secret Agent is being Targeted - Day 264

 

 

This is a continuation to the Previous blogs:

The Secret Agent in the Mind - Day 261

The Rewards and Justifications of the Secret Agent Character (Part 1) - Day 262

The Rewards and Justifications of the Secret Agent Character (Part 2) - Day 263

 

Note - for the purposes of having a context to the following, I suggest to first read the previous blogs before continuing.

 

I'll start with a story that assisted me to understand the 'Targeting system' in a simple and Commonsensically way:

When I studied Law, I was interested in practicing the Criminal Law and before I made the decision whether or not I should go for it, I arranged a meeting with my Criminal Law Professor. Previous to the meeting, I was quite sure that the Professor will be the next stop before I'll commit myself to this life path. Little did I know that the meeting will be the stepping stone for my decision to not only go not peruse the Criminal law life path but to not become a lawyer at all because as far as I was concerned, being a lawyer wasn't something I really wanted to be but if I would have become a lawyer, I would only go for Criminal Law practice.

 

The Professor gave me some insights to consider, based on his past experiences and as I saw it, the points he pointed out were valid and made sense from the perspective of why it was best for me to not become a Criminal Lawyer. But within the context of this blog, one of the relevant point he said to me was something like:

"Let's say you start working with a client when he is quite young. Slowly but surely, the client would expose you to the truth of what they had actually done but since you are their lawyer, your job is to protect them. Now, let's say that this client is becoming part of Mafia. What would you do then? One option is to keep protecting the client and try sleeping at night which will be quite difficult because you know what you are allowing in this world. The other option is to say: "No more". Do you really think they will let you go so easily, when you know so much about them? when you are now a threat to them? when you showed your disloyalty to them? most likely that if you chose the second option, you'll be removed, disappear, dead. If you would have a family at this stage, your entire family would be in risk because the client would do what ever needs to be done to make you shut up and they will leave nothing for chance."

 

So, within that context, the Criminal Lawyer of a Mafia Client is acting as the Secret Agent. Although, not necessarily with the same benefits, rewards and experiences like the Government/Agency's Secret Agent.

The point is - when and as the Secret Agent would show signs of threat to the Government/Agency/Client wherein, the Government/Agency/Client would lose Everything they have worked for if the Secret Agent open their mouth, the Agent would be targeted as a threat and would most likely to be removed by unexpected 'Accident'.

Now, if you do your research, you would see that many world leaders where assassin or died in 'Unexpected accident' when they stood as a threat to the system of Control and Greed. Yes, many would say that I'm now participating with Conspiracy Theories but the truth of the matter is - Those that claim that without studying and investigating the History from all dimensions are in essence directed by FEAR as a justification that would allow them to remain ignorant because after all - Ignorant is bliss (when one has Money to afford the Bliss). 

If you Dare and allow yourself to practically connect the dots throughout history, you'd see for yourself the unspoken truth that effected your life, directly or indirectly and the Lives of all of us. You would see that this world would have already been a world that is best for all, if these world leaders would have the opportunity to establish and implement the policies they would have established, if they wouldn't have died from unexpected accidents.

 

The Secret Agent that dares to Question the System is immediately targeted. How does that correlate to the Secret Agent in the mind? This will be explained in my next blog.

The Drama Queen calling for attention - From Reaction to Correction - Day 260

This is a continuation to:

Just another Drama Queen - Day 258

The Drama Queen Painfully calling for Attention - Day 259

 

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to harm, sabotage and compromise my human physical body deliberately to draw attention to myself. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use and abuse my human physical body to draw attention to myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand my starting point within the Desire to draw attention to myself and within that, haven't investigated the insecurity and inferiority that I had experienced within and as myself  which had led to the harm, abuse, sabotage of myself and my human physical body. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where children do not have respect for themselves and their human physical body to the extent of which they would harm, sabotage abuse and compromise themselves as the human physical body, to draw attention to themselves as this is how they know how to cope with their friction and conflict between the inner and external reality; in this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where children do not learn basic Life skills in how to assist and support themselves to instead of Reacting within and as themselves, to work with the principle of Prevention and accordingly, prevent harmful experiences, without having to go through experiences that could have been prevented if children were taught to be effective and self responsible human beings in this world.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to investigate the Desire to draw attention to myself in every way possible and within that, investigate the trigger point, the thoughts, the images, the pictures, the imaginations that in alignment, activated my want need and desire to draw attention to myself in a specific moment in time as the outflow of these accepted and allowed participation in my mind.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself, already as a child, when seeing what I'm accepting and allowing myself to participate with when I accessed the Drama Queen character in the school play yard, to continue participating within it because I Believed that I couldn't stop now, as everyone will see me and judge me as a Drama Queen which would harm my Status as how I perceived my status to be. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world where children are raised to compete and fight for their social status and within that, would allow themselves to harm, abuse, compromise and sabotage themselves to maintain the Perceived Status they believe they must sustain in every way possible.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to see myself as inferior and unworthy in comparison to the other kids and to compensate for the experience, I believed that if something will happened to me, everyone will step in and I'll be the centre of attraction. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to test my popularity within my mind through going into my imagination domain, and play a scene of me laying in the Hospital, in a coma, and people are coming to see me and be with me or just being extremely sick, spending months in the hospital while people are daily coming to see me and hang out with me.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to my peers in relation to how popular they are and how much attention they receive from their friends and family and within that, I believed that only way to get the same amount of attention would be if something terrible will happened to me. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be frustrated that everything is ordinary and normal in my life and accordingly, directed myself into creating deliberate Drama to make my life 'Interesting' according to my eye's view. Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that the only reason I would deliberately create Drama in my life is through the belief that I've created within and as myself that Drama=Attention.

 

I commit myself to SHOW and Expose the Educational system that promote Peer Group Pressure that would lead to children harming, sabotaging, abusing and compromising themselves and their physical body for the sake of Social Status and Attention.

 

I commit myself to further investigate all the Dimensions with regards to the Desire for Attention to assist and support myself in being aware of myself in every given moment and within that, to not accept and allow myself to deliberately create unnecessarily harm to myself and my physical body.

 

I commit myself to further investigate my childhood years as I see, realize and understand that my childhood years are the building blocks of the multiple character that I've created within and as myself which led into a complete separated entities that I exists as, in a complete automation and thus, separation from myself and this world.

 

Here is a comment that I received on my previous blog:

X has left a new comment on your post "The Drama Queen Painfully calling for Attention - ...":

 

"I would deliberately create pain or injury for myself to get attention and within that, the extent that I would take my body through, just for the sake of the attention I may receive. I mean - this is cruel self abuse"

THANK YOU MAYA.

I relate to this point.

I have arrived to the point of cutting myself, punching my eye and hitting my head in a moment where I needed attention, I was enraged , desperate and hateful.

 

I commit myself to share and through this support others that had face and are facing the same points within and as themselves as I see, realize and understand that we are all the same and through me sharing my own process, other gets the opportunity to see themselves within my blogs and accordingly, take the responsibility to assist and support themselves within the decisions they make of what they would accept and allow within themselves and what they would not.

The Drama Queen Painfully calling for Attention - Day 259

What I haven't understood when and as I accessed to the Drama Queen Character is the relationship between the mind and the Physical and within that, the consequences it consists of.

It is interesting that the consequences are always being justified and/or Denied so that we can continue exactly as we always been without ever looking into and as ourselves to find out the core/source/origin of our behaviour, mannerism and attitudes towards ourselves and others.

 

So what is the nature of the Drama Queen? The first point that came up when I started to investigate character was the Desire for attention. It is when one experience oneself as insecure, inadequate and inferior within and as oneself through which one would try and balance oneself through deliberately create scenes, experiences and events that would draw the attention one required to receive from others.

Within and underneath this desire, exists a Fear. (I will get to the Fear Dimension in a moment).

 

For myself, the Drama Queen Personality/Character started in a very young age through creating Physical Painful experiences. What is fascinating is that when I look back at my life - the real Physical pain and consequences were very much in a silent experiences meaning - I would not go to the extreme of screaming and crying because in doing so, the pain increase. So for instance, when I was about 6 years old, I fell down the stairs in a friend's building house. It was a direct fall of one store height which I rolled all the way down. The Consequences of such event were severe. The doctors said to my parents that I lost my sight in my left eye and the chances that I will ever see again are very low. Fortunately, that wasn't so and my sight return to full function. The point is - the experience within myself was of silent. One of the neighbours who heard the fall came out to see what was going on but that was as far as my memory goes. The next thing was my mother taking me to the hospital.

 

Then, in another incident, already in high school - we were taken to a water park and my entire class went to the tubing slider together - we held hands, all connected to each other and I was the last one on the chain of people. Due to the force that was in play, when I got to the first slide curve, still holding hands with the person in front of me, I was pulled down and my body was thrown from head down till my head knocked the floor; I got a concussion and 2 spots on my spine were out. However, also within this, the experience was of silent within me. No screaming, no yelling out laud for attention. Can't remember the next scene in details. All I remember was 6 months of physiotherapy recovery after that event.

 

But now, when I go back to the memory I shared yesterday, about the 3 stairs that I fell from in the school yard - man, I made a huge scene. I remember it almost to the specific details because I knew that I was making a scene and by the time that I realized what I was doing, my Ego couldn't let me just go away with it - so I continued, trying to make it real so that I won't be judged as someone that yells 'wolf' while there is no wolf around.

 

Thus, what is interesting here is to see how I would create scenes for me to be the main star, through utilizing 'human compassion' when they see someone gets hurt. I guess it is also a cultural thing - in Israel, people are very compassionate when they see someone get hurts in front of their eyes. However for instance, when I was in Prague, I saw someone falls down on the street and I was the only one who approached him.

 

But the specific point that I'm looking at here is how I would deliberately create pain or injury for myself to get attention and within that, the extent that I would take my body through, just for the sake of the attention I may receive. I mean - this is cruel self abuse even though it had never manifested to the extreme of real physical damage. Who knows what I would have done to myself if I haven't faced this point now? This is why it is crucial to move from a reaction to correction so that I won't have to face this point physically but rather, prevent the consequences because there is no real reason to manifest such things in one's life.

 

Will walk the Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments in tomorrow's blog so stay tuned.

 

Just another Drama Queen - Day 258

 

 

So a point opened up yesterday - I was off, down, without any specific reason, nothing really happened but the general Experience was of a mini Depression. For a moment, I allowed it, I justify it, tried to avoid it, saying to myself that I'm tired because it is extremely hot. The fact that my body is well adjust to heat and that the heat in South Africa is 'nothing' in comparison to Israel wasn't relevant in my eye's view.

I had pain in my upper leg which again, I justified it as a physical point that manifested due to me pushing myself in aerobic exercises. And again, the excuse was that "I need to take a day off from practicing, my body is showing me that I need to rest. it must have been because I pushed to hard in the last exercise session"'.

 

But, I am 'Lucky' to live in a supportive environment that would expose me to my own dishonesties and would 'force' me to a level of self honesty to see the real core/source point that I'm facing which I haven't sorted out as an indication of a physical consequences that manifested in my upper leg. So, Esteni came to see me and while we were discussing the system that were busy showing itself on my upper leg, I was looking at the core/origin/source point that I've accepted and allowed within myself. I saw a few dimensions that I haven't considered before within my application but the main point I would like to speak about today is my Need to Create a Drama when everything is OK.

 

It's like - Everything was fine, things works and I am becoming more effective within my time management which gave me a few hours during the day without any particular responsibility I had walk BUT, without having to work, my mind went into a shock and immediately I created a fake Drama for me to participate with. Which is fascinating because the few hours that suddenly cleared up on my Schedule, which was a shock to my systems,  wasn't something I prepared myself for; it was something out of my ordinary routine and so - instead of moving and directing myself, I allowed myself to follow my mind into fear of - "is this what I'm going to do for the rest of my life? Is it possible that I will have moments without having anything particular to do? Are you sure there isn't something I must do now? How can it be that I have a free moment for myself? Maybe I forgot something? There must be something that I've missed.. And so - from not having any particular task to do, and seeing everyone around me busy, I went into the Fear of my Future - to now think about: "what am I going to do with my life? Will I have a partner in my life? Who is a good candidate for a relationship? Can it be Here or would I have to leave the farm to find a partner in Israel? But maybe I should go to Prague? Or the US? or Canada or Mexico"? Man - my mind went into so many directions - everything but to simply be here, appreciate the moment of nothingness, breathe and be OK with myself without having to do anything..

 

So in essence - this train of thoughts was a distraction, was how I've programmed myself to react when I have a moment for myself and how I would occupied myself in my mind to avoid a moment of intimacy with myself by simply be 'here'. When I snapped out of this mind fuck and re-aligned my starting point through removing all the mind distraction I found an interesting design - the Drama Queen Character.

 

A few years back, I when I was just starting my 'real' independent life, I worked in a company where one of my Co-Workers ALWAYS had a Drama in her life. In comparison to her, my life was a complete boring story. My house was a few blocks from work and we spent lots of time in my house after work. Each day, she would tell me another Dramatic story from the Previous day. I was Jealous because I was bored and I also wanted to have stories to share. You know the saying: be careful what you wish for? Lol  I manifested the Drama that I wished to have but only if I knew that Drama, isn't pleasant in most cases.

 

But when I go back to my memories, the Drama Queen character was always active to a certain degree. I remember one day, grade 5, I fell down to the ground from a small platform. I mean, really small - it was only 3 stairs away from the ground. The platform was in the path between my class room and the teacher lounge.

When I fell down, I started screaming so laud so that all the teacher could hear me, and all the kids would feel sorry for me. Basically, I wanted the attention.

 

So, within my next blogs to come, I'll open up this point in more details to stop the sabotage cycle that I accepted and allowed through the creation of the Drama Queen Character and within that, assist and support myself in becoming Ok and intimate with myself. Now within that context, intimacy isn't from a sexual perspective, it is a relationship with myself of appreciation, care and respect. 

 

 

Blind Spot and Deceiving Hope - Day 255

I always stopped myself from watching Documentary because I believed that I must have knowledge and information regarding the History of Humanity which I perceived myself as lacking and incapable of learning and educate myself and thus, the Common Belief I held within myself was that watching Documentaries that are based on History is useless because I won't get it anyway.

 

It was very recently that I pushed through the point of resistance and gave myself the Gift of Real Time Education where I could not only start adding the dots in the History of Humanity but also Learn much of the unspoken truth regarding the world and within that, our lack of responsibility that had lead to this manifestation that we call 'Life on Earth'. Only through the Education Process I set forth for myself I had realized that unless we correct what we have created, we stand no chance.

 

Like me, there are Million or even Billion people that have access to Real Education that is shared unconditionally. Real Education meaning - not the Education one learns at School. This type of education is very much Bias, Limited and of the interest of those who are in Power. But again, you don't have to believe what I say here - investigate it for yourself - Is anything you learn at school was in any way Practical? Did it open your horizons in becoming an effective human being in this world?

Within that context, I suggest watching the 'COLLEGE CONSPIRACY' Documentary that explain in detail the forces that are involved in the current Education System and why the Education System around the world is inadequate, impractical and in no way exists to Empower, Grow and Expand the Human Race.

 

Last week I watched the Documentary - Blind Spot which for a moment, activated some Fears and Reactions within me however, when I stepped out of my Pre-Program design of Reacting instead of Preventing, I've realized that literally, if we continue reacting and only sort out the manifested consequences only after it had already manifested to a point of no return, there is no way we will make it. Well, maybe we will, but the generation to come will most certainly not.

 

The reason why we would not investigate the Problems in this world and move to a Principle of Prevention instead of Reaction is due to the inherent Design of HOPE that is based on our Self Interest.

It’s funny that We all say that we care for our children, that our children are our world and yet, we do nothing to ensure that the Life of our children and their Children will be Certain, safe and sound from the perspective stabilizing Earth for them to have a world to live in. It is interesting that we believe that our Love for our children comes down to making sure that their life will be safe as long as WE live; as long as we Exists; because really, what we want to define ourselves as is in being Good and Loving Parents and yet, we do not care at all, about the Lives of our grandchildren and their grandchildren because the Physical Evidence is showing that we are living in a doomed Earth that unless we do something NOW to make sure Earth will Remain, there would be no Life on Earth on 90-200 years from now.

 

Hope is a very interesting Design - it is a BLIND Participation within and on this Earth, within the comfortable belief that everything will be fine and we will find a solution for what ever may occur because thus far, we survived like this - there was always a person or a group of beings that found a solution for the problem that had manifested and this is why, I'm not worried about anything, it will be ok. But will it be ok? What if there is a point where there is no way of fixing the problem any more? What if our grandchildren will live in a world where fossil fuel will be no more, where food would not be accessible, maintained and sustained? Why is it that despite of the Scientific evidence that we are heading towards the end of Fossil Fuel in this world, where alternative energies will not sustain and be enough to our current life style, we sit and do nothing? Hoping and depending on Science to bring the solution while Science already came and presented solutions - but we do not want to listen to the solution in the nature of Prevention because that would mean that we will have to change - change the way we consume, the way we live, the way we enjoy our life style.

 

Hope is also sound like Help - Always hoping for someone or something to Help us, to Save us. When will we realize that no one is coming to save us? that there is no God, no UFO coming to save earth, No Jesus coming of a cloud, no Superman that will save the day - it is only us - we cannot continue ruin this earth and expect others to clean our mess - there is also no money in this world that would buy the renewal of earth because Money is one of the main reasons for the destruction of earth in the first place.

 

I suggest reading my blog: From Reaction to Prevention and Obviously, watch the documentaries listed below to have a better understanding of what really goes on underneath our nose. We have the solution, but we require you to stand with because unless you move, unless you change, no movement or change is possible. We are in this together, we have to take ourselves out of it together. There isn't any other way.

 

"Remember the world system is just a system of relationships. It only exists because of all the participants; so if the participants change, the world changes – it’s really simplistic. It’s an individual thing. That’s why one by one, everyone must change, to bring about a change in the world. And you have to actually change the relationships, so that the relationships that are formed between people, animals, environment, is what is best for all Life – really simplistic". Bernard Poolman

 

Blind Spot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=pByCxG2dIWY

 

War on Democracy

http://johnpilger.com/videos/the-war-on-democracy

The Century of the Self: Part 1- Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

 

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

 

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

 

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/ 

 

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

 

Investigate Equal Money System - It is time to MOVE - Will you dare to care for REAL?

Pets as a reflection of Self Intimacy - Day 252

This is a continuation to my Previous blog: My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251 which was also a direct continuation to the Series:  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet'.

 

I would also suggest to listen to the Interviews: Pets and Owners Relationship Review to have a better understanding of the relationship connection between Human Beings and Dogs.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Express myself and allow myself to approach new human beings without fear of rejections and judgement and I could only do it when there is an animal presence to support me to feel comfortable and safe within and as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that I've projected my Strength and my expression onto my Dog, as if she was the reason why I was able to express myself and approach human being and getting to know them and within this, haven't realized that my dog was standing as a reflection of me, of who and what I am and she was simply showing me the component that I have within and as me which I am able to stand as who I am, regardless of her presence.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to utilize my dog as a source of power and confident to approach human being and getting to know them and I haven't allowed myself to explore who I am within approaching human beings and develop effective communication with them with or without her presence.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use my dog to avoid certain people within the excuse that my dog needs me because I felt uncomfortable to be directive in my expression and communication and simply walk away when I saw that the human beings are abusive in nature and there is no way I can assist and support them from where they are within their processes. Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize how I have limited and compromised myself when I was not directive within and as myself as I allowed the morality codes to decide for me how I behave and act instead of seeing self honestly, in the moment, what would be the best approach to direct each and every point and go for it within absolute self trust, without having to use excuses and justification to present myself as nice to others, to not hurt their feelings. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see how I have manipulated myself to believe that I don't want to hurt people feelings instead of seeing the core of the fear which is the fear of being judged, mocked and defined as unpleasant. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed the fear of conflict and friction with other human beings to be my directive principle instead of walking according to a principle that would bring about the best for all outcome in every moment of breath, regardless the others onions, judgement, definition of me.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear that people would judge my expression and define me as aggressive when and as I am being directive within my communication and thus, I utilized my dog as an excuse to avoid conversation with people that activated specific emotions and feelings within and as myself instead of first, turn the point back to myself and investigate what was the nature/source/core of such feelings and emotions and sort myself out so that I could direct the moment effectively regardless their judgement and definitions towards me. 

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear being and becoming intimate with other human beings and therefor, when and as moments of intimacy emerged where I could transcend the fears and become vulnerable in in allowing others to get know me and vice versa, I immediately went towards my dog, diverting my attention towards her and expressed intimacy with her and kept distance from the beings that I could have been intimate in communication with.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear Intimacy with human beings and therefor, developed intimacy with Animals because they cannot hurt me, manipulate me and leave me when things get a little bit uncomfortable and tough. In this, I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to trust myself to NOT attach any emotional value to Intimacy and simply stand as an expression of intimacy within and as me and thus, I avoided Intimacy with human beings and projected it onto animals so that I won't have to face my issues and could remain in fear, very much suppressed without ever sorting myself out.

 

I commit myself to investigate my Fears of Intimacy and to assist and support me in becoming an expression of intimacy within and as myself. In this, I Commit myself to discover my own relationship with intimacy and to sort out what ever issues I may find within and as myself.

 

I commit myself to allow myself to get to know people for who they are for real, to approach human beings with no previous judgement, opinions and ideas about them and within that, allow them to also get to know me which through that relationship, I commit myself to expand, grow and empower myself with the assistance and support of others as a reflection and mirroring of me.

 

I commit myself to allow myself to stand vulnerable with other human beings and to let go of all the protection mechanisms that I've created within and as my mind as I now see, realize and understand that what I was missing was Self Trust in moving and directing myself, in any given moment and therefor, utilize Mind Personalities to define and tell me who I am in any given moment.

 

I commit myself to assist and support myself to develop absolute self trust within and as myself and in this, to develop absolute self intimacy with myself because I realized that unless I sort out my own self intimacy issues, I won't be able to develop intimacy in self honesty with others and if I won't be able to develop intimacy with others, I won't be able to develop intimacy with all livings beings in existential level, in equality and oneness.

My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251

 

 

This is a continuation to the Series -  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet':

 

Today, I will be investigating one Dimension within my relationship with my dog, Yalda, due to a point opened up yesterday. But first, I will share the Time Line of Events so that one could follow the reason for the point that had opened up.

 

As I've shared, we experienced on the farm a wave of unexpected Death of Animals that had now extended to a Domino effect wherein Grootman, Fidelis's horse, Physically reacted to the Lose of Titan and become Extremely Sick with a Colic diseas, to the extent of us having to be with him 24/7 to monitor his health. It seems that he pass through the hard phase and he is now alright.

Yesterday, when I was spending a moment with Esteni and Robert, Maite came to see us and called us to run towards the stable to assist with Grootman. We had to keep him moving and in turns, we took him for a run. This event went on for an hour and that was an hour after Leila, Cerise, Gian and Fidelis were running with him.

 

At some stage, the horse Vet came and we were all there to support Grootman while receiving the treatment. We were all there for hours, waiting for him to stabilize with no results. There were moments when Grootman had to be sedated and injected with Pain Killers and we were sitting outside his stable, having conversations and you know - having "forced" to have communal evening with each other. If it wasn't for Grootman suffering in Pain and the circumstances of us gathering together, it could have been a pleasant and enjoyable night.

 

I've been on the farm for more than a year now and it was the first time I spend time with all the farm people together which made me wonder about why is it that only when consequences emerged, people come close to each other and stand as a support for each other. Why can't I just enjoy the company of others and arrange Communal Gathering in a spontaneous way, without having to have consequences that would place us together in the same time/space?

 

So today, I was looking at the point of my relationship with my Dog. What also supported me in opening up the points regarding the Relationship between Humans and Pets was the Dog's Life Review we recorded Yesterday.

 

What I have not realized within my Relationship with Yalda was the Mirroring System and what she was actually busy showing me which I wasn't willing to see, till today.

 

What was cool about having a dog is that the responsibility 'forces' me to get out of the house to allow the dog to pee and shit. What was also cool that almost everyone in my neighbourhood had a dog and accordingly, I met many new people Which I enjoyed as I got to know them.

I was always grateful for my dog for being the reason of meeting new people because without her, I wouldn't not approach new people and I would not dare to start conversations with strangers.  That is the point Yalda was showing me - that in essence, I didn't really had to have her around to be able to get to know new people, I could have simply do it, approach people, with no fear. But.. I didn't saw it.

 

Yalda was my comfort zone, the thing that I could either get close to the people that I wanted to get close to, or either go away from those that I didn't want to get involved with. And on a certain level, she could sense who I didn't like and who I liked and accordingly support me in giving me the door to choose how I want her to behave in every single moment.

 

I didn't feel alone with her - I could go to the beach when ever I wanted, without having to schedule it with anyone to come with, I could go at night and take a walk in the dark, I could do what ever I wanted, as long as she was with me. The moment we were apart, I felt uncomfortable, that something is missing and I did what ever I could to go back and be with her. It was to the extreme where if a friend didn't allow me to bring her with me, I didn't went to see them, they had to come visit me. And lol, after a while, I quit my job and found other jobs where she could come and join me.

 

Anyway - the point is that - Yalda, or Animlas, give us the 'excuse' to develop Relationships, open for us a door to start talking to people and get to know them. what I haven't realized was - that the point that held me from doing the same without her was Fear.

 

I'll go up to here for today and continue with Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective application tomorrow.

Our Responsibility and Accountability for Each Death that could have been Prevented - Day 250

Here I am continuing walking the 'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet' series which I've started walking when Babitjie (Cat) died 2 days ago from Kidney Failure which also followed by the Death of Titan (Horse) due to extensive and aggressive unexpected cancer. Within this blog, my focus will be on Human Intervention and the Existential Consequences that resulted with the abuse and suffer of the Animal Kingdom; abuse and suffering that could have been Prevented if Human Beings would have been Aware, considerate and compassionate.

 

Before I start, there is a quote I'd like to bring forth:

 

"...as has been mentioned within the Animal Life Review Series, how Human Intervention interfered with the Equilibrium between the environment/weather and the earth/animal/insect/plant Kingdoms and created an complete imbalance in/as so many physical relationships, that it has forced all such parts/dimensions/beings in/as/of this Physical Existence into and as states of Survival/Compensation. This has caused an outflow-consequence within and as the Physical Relationships in/as this Physical Existence – from some parts of the Earth becoming inhabitable, to the extinction of animal/nature Species, to the Pollution of rains, to the unpredictability of weather conditions and its according consequences in its relationship to the Earth/Environment. To which human beings would attribute further consequence, because with the physical changing its relationships according to the Human Factor – the Human will then accordingly Respond to the changes the Physical made, because of the Human - to Survive, and more often than not; the human will ‘respond’ to Physical Changes – at the Sacrifice of the physical, the earth, the environment and all species, from the minute, to the small to the great within and as it. “Conquering” the Physical – well, the consequence of the Human Factor in its relationship to the Physical is clearly becoming evident, as the Physical, especially now within the bacterial, virus, microscopic, micro-organism dimensions/parts/particles is definitively showing who in this relationship between Man and Physical is in fact in Control. I mean, human beings have not even 1 + 1’d this Equation in the relationship between ourselves and the Physical with how Little human’s awareness in fact extend to understanding the Complexity of the interrelationships within our own Physical Bodies, let alone Existence as a whole…" Heaven's Journey to Life - Consciousness + Time = Doomsday? - Day 245

 

And:

 

"...Each time an animal has to be put down as the result of undue suffering – it is testimony to our legacy of fucked-up-ness.

Each time a child dies of starvation, while it could have been provided for, but we didn’t care to create and structure the world in a way to make it possible for all to live a dignified Life – it is a testimony to our fucked-up-ness.

I’ve dealt with a lot of deaths on the farm, and this is the one point that keeps on striking me, because most of the time the death was not a natural death where an animal’s life had been lived to completion – but most of the time the death was the result of consequence as a ‘negative side-effect’ of the world we’ve produced and participate in, which means it was each time an untimely death that could have been prevented…" Leila's Journey to Life - Day 146: Death of a Horse

 

 

So - for a long time I didn't want to face my Self interest within it all to see my accountability and responsibility for each and every Death that could have been Prevented. I couldn't connect the dots to see my direct relationship with the Manifested consequences as the current abuse, suffering of Humans and Animals.

It was only a few days ago where I could finally see this point for myself, while writing a blog Review on Derren Brown's TV show: Derren Brown Expose - Crowed behaviour is Evil - Day 246: "...What was not exposed in this show is the Indirectly Crowd Behaviour of us human being, that have the means and power to change the fate of this world, to prevent the birth of children to a world of abuse and instead to prepare the way before them to birth into world that will take care of them, from birth till death.

Understand, our Silent Expression is still an expression of what we accept and allow and what we will not. The fact we do nothing to change the face of this world indicate our Evil Expression of Human Beings…"

 

So now I understand why and how I'm directly accountable and responsible for each and every unnecessary death in this world - because I have the means and access to stand up and stand as and example in this world and yet, I haven't done so to my full potential. Each one of us that sit back and allow this world to continue in it's current manifestation is accountable and responsible for each and every death that couldn't have been prevented if we were to change the world system.

 

There can be no Excuses, no Justification, no Blame. We must Realize and Understand that our Silence is the Voice that accept and allow the abuse, harm, crime, war, suffering, diseases, etc. in this world. Let's stop the Silence and make sure our Voice is Heard and that our Voice is standing in alignment to the Principle of 'What is best for all Lives on Earth'.

You must understand - there is no one that would come and save us, there is not magic pill we can take to sort everything out, there is no last minute bail-out.

 

Educate yourself to understand what is really going on in this world to within that, understand your accountability and Responsibility:

 

Blind Spot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=pByCxG2dIWY

 

War on Democracy

http://johnpilger.com/videos/the-war-on-democracy

The Century of the Self: Part 1- Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

 

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

 

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

 

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/ 

 

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

 

 

Here is one of the Equal Money System Policies that is in direct relationship to what was discussed here. let's make sure this policy is coming to it's optimum manifestation: Stewardship

Within an Equal Money system it will be recognized that Humans are a part of the Ecosystem they live in. The word 'eco' stands for 'home' - and thus, each human will be responsible for maintaining the Balance and Harmony within their home, within their Ecosystem. This involves the Monitoring of the Well-Being of the Plants and Animals within one's Environment and to Intervene when Disharmony occurs as a result of Human Impact, so that a new Equilibrium can be established.