The other side of betrayal - Day 504

Continuing with my previous blog - Betrayal - Loss of the Illusion - Day 503

Disclaimer - what I am about to share in this blog post, does not validate cheating and/or betrayal in anyway whatsoever though it will shed some light on 'why' sometimes these things are happening. Obviously, the whole playout can be prevented if we all become honest with ourselves and stop suppressing our expressions and  within it, be willing to be open with ourselves about that which is going on inside ourselves though this is another point that I will be opening up in my next blog.

There is no doubt that when a betrayal is done unto you, there is a lot of anger and mistrust playing out in the mind. One feels cheated on, insecure within oneself, doubting oneself - all in all, it is an unpleasant experience to be the one who is being betrayed.

The questions that I kept on asking when I felt betrayed was: "how could they do this to me?" - the question contained blame and anger and even though I asked the question, I did not want to look at the answer, I didn't want to take responsibility and understand 'why' this things can happen and within that, why is it that I must not take it personally. I didn't want to see that to a certain degree, I have done the same.

Once upon a time, I had a very very good male friend, we shared a deep connection with one another that I never could describe in words. For many years, I resisted the depth of our connection due to my unresolved relationships issues so I made sure that the boundaries between us are clear - we are just good friends and that was it.

Our friendship connection never compromised or interfered with our relationships with other people though we were substantially closer when both of us were single. This has been going on for years and while 'something more' has always been like a cloud in my mind, I resisted looking deep inside of myself to see what is it that I am really resisting.

To make a long story short as this been going on for years - at one point in time, I was single and he was in a relationship for almost a year. He was caught up in a life situation where he didn't have any communication with anyone and we were all worried for his life. For almost a month, I was in a state of concern, we all knew that there is a chance that he may be dead. Inside of me, I felt that the wall I was busy building all of these years is starting to crack down or in other words, the resistance that I had to see what I actually want from our relationship started to melt down and for the first time I was willing to admit to myself that our relationship is not just friendship relationship - it was far more than that, there was what I defined back than as love which to me, love, was something I always preferred walking away from as that would mean allowing myself to be vulnerable and exposed which was something I feared doing.

After a month, out of the blue, he called me, he was alive - it was one of the most happiest days of my life but one of the most fearful days at the same time, because I had to face what I felt inside of myself. I was the first phone call he had made and a few hours later, he was at my door step, half dead inside but very much alive. Everything disappeared when I saw him - all that existed was us, and the historical connection that we shared with one another. It was an accumulation of many moments where we both knew that we were supposed to be together yet, none of us was willing to look in self-honesty and walk through the individual fears that kept us apart. We looked at each other's eyes and we both knew where we are going from that moment onwards. Honestly, I didn't consider his partner in that moment in time as I mentioned - in that evening, everything disappeared, morality disappeared, my fears were gone, it was a letting go moment.

To start with, us manifesting this moment while he is in a relationship, should not have happened. It could only happened because I was not honest with myself from the get go, from the moment I recognized that I am resisting walking a life path with him as my partner and accordingly pushing through my resistances. So again, I am in no way justifying or excuse myself from my responsibility though, I understand now why is it that sometimes, things like that happen and with that understanding, I am ready now to forgive those who were in my shoes where they find themselves in a difficult situation where a suppressed moment was 'here' to express. So, essentially – the moment him and I were together that evening, while he was in a relationship – was because we suppressed our self honesty over such a long time and then our honesty turned into DESIRE for one another and once the desire took over, pushing us to express our suppressions over so long, we did not consider reality, the implications and consequences of our actions as our desires for one another superseded considering ourselves and our relationship with others. Because looking back now, if I were honest from the beginning, if I did not accept and allow myself to suppress – him and I could have talked things over first, share what we feel / experience, make a decision to be together or not and then only first direct our relationship with others before creating something together. So, this is the point that we need to have a look at; how acting on desires can lead to consequences in relationships and not considering reality.

That also answered my next question - "why didn't they tell me before they started seeing each other?" - "Why was it done behind my back?" - Here again, sometimes things happens in a moment and you don't know where this moment would lead to. When he called me and I realized he was alive, when he showed up at my door step - our self-honesty played out for the first time in years. The only thing he could do was breaking the relationship off the next day when it was clear that he cannot continue walking a path with his partner. Again here, it is not to justify, it is to understand the forces behind people's behavior and to realize, it has nothing to do with the person who was 'cheated on' - it doesn't make them less at all, nothing is wrong with them - the connection is the directive force and interestingly enough, I now understand that one cannot choose connections - it either exists or it is not; if it does exists, and apart of you is aware of it, you must realize that there are going to be consequences for you allowing suppression to exists inside of you. When the connection is that strong, it is going to manifest in some way or another.

In my next blog post, I will be discussion the prevention process - how to support yourself when you see yourself suppressing a connection with another and how to prevent consequences where other people may get hurt when this connection can no longer be suppressed and a desire takes over.

A year passed by - Day 481

Gian was mentioning the other day that when ever someone speak about Bernard, they speak about him in a present tense; and I was looking at this point for myself of how to me Bernard is still 'here' as the principles that he stood as and lived by - this, could  never die with him.

 

His death was a challenge to say the least - having to 'grow up' from Bernard's protective shell and finding my own feet within myself. Learning to trust myself, learning to direct and move myself, learning to develop communication skills that are based on support to one another, learning to live independently and yet interdependent with the people around me; learning to consider myself and others, learning to care for myself and others, learning to be patience with myself and others.

 

Bernard, in his presence, showed us the way and the tools to develop these potentials inside ourselves but it was up to us to stand up and walk these potentials, as principles for ourselves and each other. With his death, we had to make the ultimate decision of who we are and what we stand for though for and for us, there was never a question - we just stood and continued walking, together, with absolute support to one another.

 

Cerise mentioned today in her blog:

In order for us to really grow we had to step out from under the protection that Bernard gave us. It may not have been his intention to shelter us, but he did nonetheless. He would weather a storm if it meant another wouldn't have to. We got too comfortable in the safety and guidance he naturally gave out, we did not move ourselves. The only way that we could really stand up on our own was for him to die - we were not doing it on our own

 

Indeed - those who knew Bernard realized this point for themselves - that for us to grow and expand ourselves, he had to die as we didn't take the responsibility to stand up when he was alive - we were all hoping that we could find a ways to change without actively and physically changing ourselves.

 

Bernard's death in many ways showed us the consequences of when waiting for someone else to walk that which we have to walk ourselves. Realizing this now will not change the past but we can change the future where we no longer wait for consequences to manifest but instead we walk the prevention process as solutions that can be physically applied.

 

Therefore, I will not repeat the same mistake again in waiting for someone to pave the way for me instead of me paving the way for myself; I will not sit back and wait for the world to fix itself, I will become the solution myself. I will not wait until the world reaches the point of no return, I will stand up and create a future that is best for all.

 

So, in looking at the past year - what we have created together thus far and whom we have become - I am grateful for having Bernard in our lives and more so, I am grateful for the opportunity to walk with the people whom are walking with me. we have walked a long way and the road ahead is not an easy one to walk but I am certain that together we will pave the way to create future that is worth living. If anything, this was what Bernard showed us in his death.

Over Sensitive - Day 458

"A few months ago, a very good friend of mine died unexpectedly and I noticed that since then, I became over sensitive when someone in my immediate environment is injured / sick (either a human or an animal). I also noticed that I'm taking it personally when I am unable to medically support them in specific moments. For most part, it is because I have background in medicine and specifically, first aid, however, not always the injuries are part of my training and I find myself standing helpless if you will, when another is suffering and I can do nothing. What I also noticed is how quickly I go into blame and anger towards the person who had unexpectedly died, for not being here with us to direct such moments because previously it was what he used to do however, this tendency of blaming and being angry at my friend for not being here to support us, basically showing that I haven't yet taken absolute responsibility for my environment, for myself, as I am still looking for solutions outside of myself, in separation of myself.

 

Those that had knew the friend that had died knows that in his presence, one feels safe and stable no matter how things in reality are playing out; this friend could just look at me or place his hand on my shoulder and I was stable however with his death, I had to learn to stabilize myself as I now realize that it was never another that had stabilize myself per say, I was simply shown that it would always be me that could stabilize myself - the look/touch on the shoulder created a space for me to realize this point for myself - that I have the potential to assist and support myself in directing moments by moments to the best of my ability if only I give myself the permission to stand stable within and as myself and look for solutions within myself instead of outside of myself.

 

Well, unfortunately, I could only realize this for myself with another's death - as the other is not here anymore to create the space for me to stabilize myself and within this thus, blaming another or being angry at another for dying, is an abdication of self responsibility because I had already proven to myself that I am able and capable to assist and support myself, for/as myself; "

 

The above writing is something I wrote a few weeks ago when my roommate got injured. She asked me to help her and I couldn't because the injury that she had was not part of my training and trying to help could have made it even worse. I pushed myself as much as possible to remain stable not only for myself but ALSO for my friend. When she was taken to the hospital, I had a momentary mini panic attack as I experienced myself as powerless and so, instead of immediately taking self responsibility, I shifted to the blame and anger I described above.

 

I spent the night investigating and sourcing the starting point of the emotional breakdown I had experienced inside myself, I sounded Self Forgiveness  to assist and support myself as well as preparing the way for if/when another in my immediate environment get injured/sick. What I have seen was that when someone is injured and I don't have the knowledge and/or training to support them immediately, I went into a point of disempowerment within myself, looking for solutions outside of myself as a reaction, instead of simply first stabilize myself, so that I could stabilize my environment and trust myself to find the solutions that would be the best. For instance, it doesn't mean that I must be able to stand as a medical support for everything that is playing out in my environment; but what I am able to do is to look and see what would be the best approach to take in every given moment. I haven't realize that with me reacting to me not being able to medically support another, I am in essence not supporting the other because the best support would be to stand stable, investigate solutions in real time and direct the moment in stability and clarity. To do that, one do not need to have the knowledge/information and/or training - all one needs to do is stand within and as oneself and the solution would present itself.

 

Unfortunately, a few days after, my roommate came to me saying that the injury got worse and she asked me to have a look. This time, I applied the Commitments I have placed for myself for when/as someone in my environment is injured/sick. So I looked at the point, I checked myself to ensure I have no reactions inside myself and once all was clear within myself,  I was able to direct the point. Direct the point meaning - on a medical personal capacity, I couldn't do ANYTHING for my roommate however, within stability, I strongly suggested to her  to go and see a professional practitioner right away as it was obvious that the physical body required support. I again couldn't go with her to the hospital due to other responsibilities I had to attend to however this time, having my commitments in place, I remained stable within myself.

 

I'm grateful for the tools that I have to assist and support myself and my environment - Self Forgiveness to realize what I had accepted and allowed myself to participate with and the Commitment statement to prepare the way before me for a physical and immediate change.

If you haven't already, I suggest familiarize yourself with these tools through the Free Online Beginners course - DIP Lite

 

Thanks.

 

---

 

Art work - Henry Asencio, 1972 ~ Essence of Woman

Why do we wait till it's too late? - Day 409

When someone close to you unexpectedly died, the thought: "but why now? There is so much more we could have done together" is popping up in one's mind.
When looking at the nature of the thought I saw a fascinating design -

How many moments we spend with each other and take it for granted; how many times we spend a moment with another but can't wait till the moment to end so we can go and do something else that may or may not give us more pleasure; How many times we are in the company of another but at the same time, judge them; how many times we have actually embarrass the moment we share with another, actually being 'here' with another, actually care and unconditionally were interested in the expression of the other?

We take the moments we have on this earth recklessly within the starting point of what would I gain from this moment, how can this moment play out in the best outcome for me? And then, when suddenly someone is dead, all of a sudden we feel sad, feel that we didn't spend enough time with that person, that we miss the person and we say to ourselves that if we had known this person is going to die, we would have done thing differently. But would we really?

Are we really walking moment by moment to its utmost potential? Are we really caring and cherishing each other? Do we really care about the person that had died or we care about what the person could have given us that we believe we cannot give to ourselves?

Why is it that we only wake up when it is too late; that we can only stand when another falls; that we can only change if something terrible is happening. Why can we not just change as a principle of What is best for all life?

As above as Below - the same principle persists not only when someone close to use dying, it is also our attitude towards this world/earth as a whole - Why are we waiting for the world to reach the point of no return when we know that when we reach that point it is absolute, is it like death, there is really no return.

It is time to do some house-check or mind-check, if you will, and unconditionally investigate what stops us from standing up by principle of that which is best for all life and practically change? What fears comes up, what thoughts comes up, what is it inside us through which we accept and allow the diminishment of ourselves and thus this world? Why do we live in constant regret upon the things that we could have done instead of simply correct, align and change that which needs to be changed?

So it is now the time to understand that regret is not valid; that regret doesn't make us good people; regret won't change the living conditions of us all; what is valid is a decision to STOP participating with our own self interest designs and to instead truly and self honestly question ourselves and this world so that we can individually and collectively make the decision to walk moment by moment as Life that is best for all, as a living expression of ourselves.

So, if you have made the decision to stop your process of diminishment and to instead walk your process to stand as a living expression as life that is best for all, check out the DIP Lite FREE online course and the Living Income Guaranteed and in that, supporting yourself and thus, us all.

Seeing the Potential we can become - Day 407

 

Bernard had this ability to see the potential in others, to guide and support us to see ourselves, the real self; he assisted us to see our strengths, develop/empower our natural skills and to overcome the limitations we have defined as ourselves so that we could really grow and establish our self standing  within the principle of that which is best for all life. 

Bernard stood as a temporary stability point for us all and in standing as our stability point he gave us the opportunity to investigate, explore and see who we are and what we have become, what we accepted and allowed and what we will no longer accept within ourselves and this world, how can we perfect ourselves, how can we change ourselves to stand as living examples, as a principle, of that which is best for all life.

When he died, I could no longer lean on Bernard as a stability point; I have to stand as a stability point. I could no longer wait till he expose a point within myself that I haven't dealt with; I have to expose me to myself and walk through the point. I could no longer be dependent on him as a point of trust; I must become a living trust. I could no longer depend on him to support me and others; I must stand as self-support and thus supporting others.

When he died, the stability point he stood as for me that I created within myself - died with him and in that moment, I shifted into instability within and as myself. To understand though, that I am by no means saying that ‘he stood as stability FOR me’, no. For those who have met Bernard, when you’re with him – it’s like he could with/through his words, open up inside you a part of you, you haven’t realized yourself/seen yourself as a potential that you can be/become. I hadn’t realized before he died how I had, within myself, believed that ‘it was Bernard and Bernard only keeping me stable’ – when, all the while, it was in fact a point already existent within me, a potential already existent within me. Then I realized - the stability that I had seen within Bernard and also experienced within myself when with him - stood as a potential; the stability I experienced when Bernard was around is the stability I can stand as, for and as myself - it is what I can become through an accumulation of moment by moment where I direct and support myself to face that which I have separated myself from, correct, align, change - which is actually what Bernard always said: 1+1+1+1 moment by moment by moment by moment, till I stand.

He said to me once: there will be a moment where a window would open and you will be able to see and make a decision; Make sure that the decision is that which add +1 to the equality equation and that which would result with an outcome that is best for all. The window that had opened up with Bernard's death is showing the potential. The potential of what I can become as a stable and aware human being in any given moment. Bernard temporarily stood as that stability and showed me, that I can stand in stability and in awareness in every breath and thus I commit myself to assist and support myself to accumulate moments of awareness and stability until I stand in any given moment as a living principle, a living example and to then thus give to others that which Bernard gave to me - the opportunity to realize the potential we can become.

A girl is dying from being overweight -Jamie Oliver Food Revolution Review - Day 386

This is a continuation to the blog Series review about Jamie Oliver's TV series - Food Revolution.

Thus, if you haven't already, I suggest watching Jamie Oliver's TV series - Food Revolution and read through the blog series where the question: Who is Responsible for our Children's Education? is asked.

 

 

Brittany Stevens, a 16 years old girl who is overweight, was told by her doctor that her body can sustain itself for no more than 6-7 years and unless she lose weight, she will die.

Without having any support system in place, Brittany was at a point of giving up and in a way, accepted her up coming death before Jamie came into her life and gave her the tools and the support she require to be able to support herself.

 

Here is one example out of millions examples wherein children have no support and no skills to actually live in a way that is best for them; and as the consequences are severe, children are physically threaten as a result of a dysfunctional system.

 

What I have found is that we are busy judging fat people and having so many justification for these judgements inside our minds. Like having a back chat in the nature of: "what, are they not aware of themselves?" or: "I don't understand them, how could they possibly take themselves to this point". And yes, you do not understand; you do not understand the time line that had led them to develop these inner demons that eventually manifested as a point of extreme overweight and on that note, you do not even understand yourself, none of us does. We have no idea how our mind works, where our thoughts are coming from, why our thoughts even exists, why we like or dislike specific things, why our body shaped in this specific way, what are the processes that involve within the physical body and what all of that have to do with the mind. we really do not have a clue and yet, what we do best is judge that which we do not understand and within that, "forget" the most important thing - investigate all things and keep that which is best for all. If we have done so, we would start making an effort to understand and realize all the relationships that involved within each thought that we have, we would also find solutions to prevent predictable problems.

 

Brittany had to courage to expose herself and stand as an example of the consequences of our dysfunctional system and while many of us found ourselves in tears when hearing Brittany's story, none of us was actually standing up and looking at ways to prevent the problem from continue manifesting around the world in general and the US in particular; all of us remained in our comfort zone, judging or blaming or criticising but in no way making a physical stand and do something that is substantial, supportive and applicable for all.

 

SO - the solution is to apply the basic principle of establishing a stable foundation from which human rights can be implemented world wide. We have structured such system and we named it - 'Equal Money System' that would enable each being in this world to have a dignified and worthy life. That would obviously include all the support structure that would ensure these goals.

Will we step out of our comfort zone and make a change in this one life that we have or whether we let random events to be the foundation from which predictable and preventable consequences occurs?

The Compartment of Now - Day 359

If we look at our day to day living,  we can map the day according to events, time, chores, responsibilities, obligations, leisure etc. and we can in essence, categorize our day into small compartments wherein each compartment, represents a moment that would always start with us taking a breath in and would always ends with us taking a breath out.

 

What differs one compartment from another is the physical space time direction that must be walked in each compartment while the principle remain the same - what needs to be done in that moment in time in order for us to walk the point to the best of our abilities, keeping in mind all the relationships and consequences that may occur and accordingly, making sure that the outcome would be an outcome that is best for all.

 

In other words, walking each and every moments that starts with taking a breath in and ending with a breath out, can be mathematically measured and perfected to achieve the result that is best for all.

 

However, what us human being had fucked up along the way? What is the ONE thing that separates us from walking each and every moment within our optimum potential? What is the ONE point that always keeps us trapped in thought cycles, reactions, emotions and feeling? What is the reason for us unable to be effective human beings in this world that walk one breath at a time, one point/task/responsibility at a time?

 

It is FEARS - the source from which we would make our decisions; decisions that would enable us to in any given moment, protects ourselves from other fears that we have created within ourselves without even realizing that we have actually manifested these fears on a physical level so that we could justify why it make sense to live with fears. How stupid that is? being trapped in our own fears..

 

So - the Secret is NOT the power of NOW, it is the awareness of ourselves and everything that is involved within each and every compartment we breathed ourselves in until the point is done and we can breathe ourselves out. Isn't it the same as birthing into this world with our first in breath until the last breath out at death?

 

More of this will be discussed in my next blog.

Death Research - Day 350

 

This blog is not to terrify you or to make you be more fearful with regards to Death, it is rather to show you how little do we really know and how important it is to investigate all things and keep that which is best for all.

I've recently invested my time in listening to the Death Research interviews which is again to me, emphasized how we have created all sort of assumptions and opinions about Death without actually speaking with anyone that had died, someone who could share in details every moment of their death experience; you know, the real nitty gritty details and not just: "I saw the light".

 

The Death Research interviews are Fascinating from the perspective of being able to walk with a person who actually experience death, the moments of death and what is really happening to the Mind, the Physical and the being in those crucial moments.

I had this fantasy that upon death for instance, one would no longer experience Physical pain, that everything is gone, disappear and you are out of here but as with all fantasies it doesn't work like that.

I had this idea that I can trust what Science describe about death when for example the doctors says to the family of a person who died in traumatic event that the person didn't feel anything, that they lost consciousness and thus couldn't feel a thing. Unfortunately, that is not the case.

 

So why then, is it important to listen to these interviews? For myself, it is a point of motivation to actually Live and Use the time I have left to do something that is constructive, supportive and meaningful on earth, instead of reaching to my end of Life to only find out that I've missed Life while being on earth. Now, that doesn't mean that one should let go of all one's responsibility and have as much fun as possible. No, that is again not real LIFE but a distraction from the actual Gift of Life that only us, as individuals can discover for ourselves unless it is too late, and we die, without being able to come back and correct ourselves.

 

If anything, fearing Death is useless because so long as we fear what is defiantly certain, how can we honestly Live? How did we miss such a simple point of fearing something that is so definitive like the fact that we will die one day while all along, we are missing ourselves when having the physical opportunity to discover the actuality of ourselves as Life, an opportunity that will no longer exists at death. I mean, do you know anyone who didn't die? No right?! So why do we fear dying if it something that is so natural and if we appreciate life so much that we don't want to die, why isn't this appreciation is shown in a physical measurable manner?

 

If we really cared about Life, wouldn't we be busy creating a world where LIFE could be lived by all without having to face struggles, abuse and the atrocities that the majority of us are daily experiencing?

So, there is defiantly a dichotomy here - we fear Death and we do not want to die but yet, we do not appreciate Life according to our collective physical actions. So it is time to investigate these points and become clear about our starting point in terms of deciding if we appreciate and care about LIFE or we just here, till we die, spending the moments we've got left until our Life will be taken from us without any free will. I mean, we do not decide the time we die isn't?

 

So, the Death Research interview Series, describes specific events of death such as Heart Attack, Burning alive in a car accident, Drowning and soon you can find out what one IS experiencing when falling from a tall building. These interviews shocked me as it was nothing I could imagine; Investigate the points, prepare yourself to Life because you are living so why the hell we are not physically living but rather allowing our own mind to dictate us who and what we are? If you Dare to know the truth and debunk your fears - invest in this interview series.

 

My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251

 

 

This is a continuation to the Series -  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet':

 

Today, I will be investigating one Dimension within my relationship with my dog, Yalda, due to a point opened up yesterday. But first, I will share the Time Line of Events so that one could follow the reason for the point that had opened up.

 

As I've shared, we experienced on the farm a wave of unexpected Death of Animals that had now extended to a Domino effect wherein Grootman, Fidelis's horse, Physically reacted to the Lose of Titan and become Extremely Sick with a Colic diseas, to the extent of us having to be with him 24/7 to monitor his health. It seems that he pass through the hard phase and he is now alright.

Yesterday, when I was spending a moment with Esteni and Robert, Maite came to see us and called us to run towards the stable to assist with Grootman. We had to keep him moving and in turns, we took him for a run. This event went on for an hour and that was an hour after Leila, Cerise, Gian and Fidelis were running with him.

 

At some stage, the horse Vet came and we were all there to support Grootman while receiving the treatment. We were all there for hours, waiting for him to stabilize with no results. There were moments when Grootman had to be sedated and injected with Pain Killers and we were sitting outside his stable, having conversations and you know - having "forced" to have communal evening with each other. If it wasn't for Grootman suffering in Pain and the circumstances of us gathering together, it could have been a pleasant and enjoyable night.

 

I've been on the farm for more than a year now and it was the first time I spend time with all the farm people together which made me wonder about why is it that only when consequences emerged, people come close to each other and stand as a support for each other. Why can't I just enjoy the company of others and arrange Communal Gathering in a spontaneous way, without having to have consequences that would place us together in the same time/space?

 

So today, I was looking at the point of my relationship with my Dog. What also supported me in opening up the points regarding the Relationship between Humans and Pets was the Dog's Life Review we recorded Yesterday.

 

What I have not realized within my Relationship with Yalda was the Mirroring System and what she was actually busy showing me which I wasn't willing to see, till today.

 

What was cool about having a dog is that the responsibility 'forces' me to get out of the house to allow the dog to pee and shit. What was also cool that almost everyone in my neighbourhood had a dog and accordingly, I met many new people Which I enjoyed as I got to know them.

I was always grateful for my dog for being the reason of meeting new people because without her, I wouldn't not approach new people and I would not dare to start conversations with strangers.  That is the point Yalda was showing me - that in essence, I didn't really had to have her around to be able to get to know new people, I could have simply do it, approach people, with no fear. But.. I didn't saw it.

 

Yalda was my comfort zone, the thing that I could either get close to the people that I wanted to get close to, or either go away from those that I didn't want to get involved with. And on a certain level, she could sense who I didn't like and who I liked and accordingly support me in giving me the door to choose how I want her to behave in every single moment.

 

I didn't feel alone with her - I could go to the beach when ever I wanted, without having to schedule it with anyone to come with, I could go at night and take a walk in the dark, I could do what ever I wanted, as long as she was with me. The moment we were apart, I felt uncomfortable, that something is missing and I did what ever I could to go back and be with her. It was to the extreme where if a friend didn't allow me to bring her with me, I didn't went to see them, they had to come visit me. And lol, after a while, I quit my job and found other jobs where she could come and join me.

 

Anyway - the point is that - Yalda, or Animlas, give us the 'excuse' to develop Relationships, open for us a door to start talking to people and get to know them. what I haven't realized was - that the point that held me from doing the same without her was Fear.

 

I'll go up to here for today and continue with Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective application tomorrow.

Our Responsibility and Accountability for Each Death that could have been Prevented - Day 250

Here I am continuing walking the 'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet' series which I've started walking when Babitjie (Cat) died 2 days ago from Kidney Failure which also followed by the Death of Titan (Horse) due to extensive and aggressive unexpected cancer. Within this blog, my focus will be on Human Intervention and the Existential Consequences that resulted with the abuse and suffer of the Animal Kingdom; abuse and suffering that could have been Prevented if Human Beings would have been Aware, considerate and compassionate.

 

Before I start, there is a quote I'd like to bring forth:

 

"...as has been mentioned within the Animal Life Review Series, how Human Intervention interfered with the Equilibrium between the environment/weather and the earth/animal/insect/plant Kingdoms and created an complete imbalance in/as so many physical relationships, that it has forced all such parts/dimensions/beings in/as/of this Physical Existence into and as states of Survival/Compensation. This has caused an outflow-consequence within and as the Physical Relationships in/as this Physical Existence – from some parts of the Earth becoming inhabitable, to the extinction of animal/nature Species, to the Pollution of rains, to the unpredictability of weather conditions and its according consequences in its relationship to the Earth/Environment. To which human beings would attribute further consequence, because with the physical changing its relationships according to the Human Factor – the Human will then accordingly Respond to the changes the Physical made, because of the Human - to Survive, and more often than not; the human will ‘respond’ to Physical Changes – at the Sacrifice of the physical, the earth, the environment and all species, from the minute, to the small to the great within and as it. “Conquering” the Physical – well, the consequence of the Human Factor in its relationship to the Physical is clearly becoming evident, as the Physical, especially now within the bacterial, virus, microscopic, micro-organism dimensions/parts/particles is definitively showing who in this relationship between Man and Physical is in fact in Control. I mean, human beings have not even 1 + 1’d this Equation in the relationship between ourselves and the Physical with how Little human’s awareness in fact extend to understanding the Complexity of the interrelationships within our own Physical Bodies, let alone Existence as a whole…" Heaven's Journey to Life - Consciousness + Time = Doomsday? - Day 245

 

And:

 

"...Each time an animal has to be put down as the result of undue suffering – it is testimony to our legacy of fucked-up-ness.

Each time a child dies of starvation, while it could have been provided for, but we didn’t care to create and structure the world in a way to make it possible for all to live a dignified Life – it is a testimony to our fucked-up-ness.

I’ve dealt with a lot of deaths on the farm, and this is the one point that keeps on striking me, because most of the time the death was not a natural death where an animal’s life had been lived to completion – but most of the time the death was the result of consequence as a ‘negative side-effect’ of the world we’ve produced and participate in, which means it was each time an untimely death that could have been prevented…" Leila's Journey to Life - Day 146: Death of a Horse

 

 

So - for a long time I didn't want to face my Self interest within it all to see my accountability and responsibility for each and every Death that could have been Prevented. I couldn't connect the dots to see my direct relationship with the Manifested consequences as the current abuse, suffering of Humans and Animals.

It was only a few days ago where I could finally see this point for myself, while writing a blog Review on Derren Brown's TV show: Derren Brown Expose - Crowed behaviour is Evil - Day 246: "...What was not exposed in this show is the Indirectly Crowd Behaviour of us human being, that have the means and power to change the fate of this world, to prevent the birth of children to a world of abuse and instead to prepare the way before them to birth into world that will take care of them, from birth till death.

Understand, our Silent Expression is still an expression of what we accept and allow and what we will not. The fact we do nothing to change the face of this world indicate our Evil Expression of Human Beings…"

 

So now I understand why and how I'm directly accountable and responsible for each and every unnecessary death in this world - because I have the means and access to stand up and stand as and example in this world and yet, I haven't done so to my full potential. Each one of us that sit back and allow this world to continue in it's current manifestation is accountable and responsible for each and every death that couldn't have been prevented if we were to change the world system.

 

There can be no Excuses, no Justification, no Blame. We must Realize and Understand that our Silence is the Voice that accept and allow the abuse, harm, crime, war, suffering, diseases, etc. in this world. Let's stop the Silence and make sure our Voice is Heard and that our Voice is standing in alignment to the Principle of 'What is best for all Lives on Earth'.

You must understand - there is no one that would come and save us, there is not magic pill we can take to sort everything out, there is no last minute bail-out.

 

Educate yourself to understand what is really going on in this world to within that, understand your accountability and Responsibility:

 

Blind Spot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=pByCxG2dIWY

 

War on Democracy

http://johnpilger.com/videos/the-war-on-democracy

The Century of the Self: Part 1- Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

 

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

 

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

 

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/ 

 

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

 

 

Here is one of the Equal Money System Policies that is in direct relationship to what was discussed here. let's make sure this policy is coming to it's optimum manifestation: Stewardship

Within an Equal Money system it will be recognized that Humans are a part of the Ecosystem they live in. The word 'eco' stands for 'home' - and thus, each human will be responsible for maintaining the Balance and Harmony within their home, within their Ecosystem. This involves the Monitoring of the Well-Being of the Plants and Animals within one's Environment and to Intervene when Disharmony occurs as a result of Human Impact, so that a new Equilibrium can be established.

The Psychology of TIME - Day 190

This is a continuation to:

 

The Elite's delusion of stress - Part 1 - Day 45

The Elite's Delusion of Stress - Part 2 - Day 46

The Decision of TIME - Day 67

And:

Copy Paste Character - the Way for Success? - Day 183

Copy Paste Character - The Education System - Day 184

Is it possible to Cheat yourself? Day 185

It is time to STOP Existing as a Human Machine - Day 186

The End of Times - Day 187

Facing the Evil within - the KEY to LIFE - Day 188

Fear of Disappointing others - Day 189

 

For the purpose of context, suggest reading these posts above prior to reading the post below, if you haven’t already. Here I will be walking the 'I don't have TIME' Character - Fear Dimension - Practical support with Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments.

 

The List below consists of the Fears which are the foundation of the 'I don't have Time' Character.

 

Fear Dimension:

* Fear that I'll disappoint other people if I won't take more tasks on myself

* Fear that I would be defined as unworthy because I'm not using my time to
   it's utmost potential.

* Fear that I won't get things done and would regret it when consequences
   would emerged so basically, fear of the consequences.

* Fear that I would be seen as not good enough, replaceable, inadequate

* Fear of being exposed as self dishonest because I know, that if I put my self
   interest desires aside, I'm able to walk my tasks in absolute perfection.

* Fear of Missing out the Positive as Entertainment

 

----

 

* Fear that I would be defined as unworthy because I'm not using my time to it's utmost potential.

 

Self Forgiveness:

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create an idea within and as myself that within each and every breath I take, I must do something that is constructive from the perspective of having some work done, and within that idea, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to judge myself when and as I use the time that I have for pleasure, entertainment and indulgent Within that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that who I am is not define by what I do but rather Who I am within what I do that is actual measurable in the outcome/result that is best for all and thus, through not accepting and allowing myself to realize that it is not what I do that defines me but rather who I am within what I do, I've accepted and allowed myself to project my own self judgement onto others within the belief that I will be judged for not being worthy if I won't invest in every second of the day, in doing a work and have it done.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear being judged by others as unworthy when and as I'm taking a moment for myself because I've created an idea that worthiness is associated/defined/connected with what one do in every moment of every breath and unless one is working as much as possible, one isn't worthy. Within that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see my desire of being righteous within the point of doing a work and using the time effectively in having things done as a point of judgement of others who are not doing the same and so, through judging others regarding of how they use their time, I make myself feel more and righteous within and as myself and in that, always keep myself busy in having things done so that I could sustain my own worthiness in my own eye's view as well as the experience of righteousness in comparison to other people in my world and my environment.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define TIME within what I do without seeing, realizing and understanding that I've Tied myself to TIME as I've lived the word TIME as 'TIE Me' wherein I have literally tied myself to the idea of time, enslaving myself by Time and being control by the living definition I have given to Time.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define 'utmost potential' within the context of having work done instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that having things done, doesn't define me as who I am as the utmost potential application if the work that is being done, is being done in separation within a starting point of Fear of judgement, fear of disappointing others and the desire of being defined as worthy by others. That implies that what ever I did, wasn't for and as Self, wasn't within breath by breath living application of actually seeing directly what needs to be done within and as the principle of that which is best for all and accordingly, walk as the utmost potential I can be as life that is physically here, breath by breath.

 

 

Self Commitments:

 

 

I commit myself to SLOW myself DOWN and within that, making sure that I'm Physically Here, walking, moving and directing myself, breath by breath. I see, realize and understand that Worthiness isn't defined by the 'More' that one does, but rather as Who one is within what one does wherein Worthiness is measurably proven by one's actions/application within one's consistency of walking breath by breath within and as the principle of that which is best for all.

 

I commit myself to assist and support myself through letting go, removing and deleting my own self definitions that I've defined myself as, according to my own programming that I was busy programming myself throughout my life. Within that, to question every action I do, everything I like or dislike, everything that makes me feel worthy and unworthy and to truly discover who I am without all those definitions that I set forth for myself which I automatically live as according to and by.

 

I commit myself to instead of walking according to TIME as Tie-Me, to assist and support myself in walking Breath by Breath, Moment by Moment according to what is physically supporting me and others and within that, walk my day to day application with Ease, in seeing and realizing that the pressure I put on myself is a stumble stone for things to not be done as I waste 'time' in thinking instead of practical directive movement in every given moment. Thus Time: T-I-Me = the decision I make to move and direct myself in any given moment, within a clear best for all starting point, breath by breath by breath that is not dependent on Energy.

 

I commit myself to get HERE and find out Who I am as the Utmost potential I can be and become when stepping out of the mind and walking breath by breath within and as a principle of Oneness and Equality as that which is best for all. Within this, I commit myself to assist and support myself to get HERE through walking the layers of my mind from the inside out, in changing myself, my automated acceptance and allowances that I've lived as, as a programmed organic Robot and to transform myself to stand within clear starting point regarding what I accept and allow and what I wouldn't not within myself and my world as a whole.

 

Art Work – Andrew Gable