The Caring Character–Day 83

This is a continuation to my previous blog:

My Life as a character - Overview - Day 79

The Family Charade in Character - Day 80

The Rebellion Daughter Mother Character - Day 81

The Submissive Daughter and the Controlling Mother Character - Day 82

For Context, also read: Day 79: Stepping out of Character with LOVED ONES - Creation's Journey to Life, Bernard Poolman.

Part 4: The Mother/Daughter Character - Looking at specific Characters:

The Caring Daughter and the relationship with the Mother

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself as Care Character to create myself as a caring Daughter because I've learnt that when I present me as a caring person, I get rewards in the form of presents, attention, hug etc. and I haven't realize that me as a care character, isn't caring from the starting point of equal and one self responsibility but rather, to satisfied my self interest desire for an experience as a reward.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself as a caring daughter character to have failed to see that who I am as an unconditional self expression of 'Care' wasn't practically applied as my starting point wasn't Equal and One what's best for all but rather, a self interest desire for an experience due to a past memory where I was rewarded for my caring action.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create and manifest myself as the caring daughter character due to FEAR of an idea I have about consequences wherein, if I won't take care of my parents, my children won't take care of me and so, my starting point in being the caring daughter character wasn't a self expression of who I am but rather another character to hide and suppress the fear character and so, I trapped myself in character, creating more character to suppress myself as character and in that, making sure that I will never step out of character and live in a complete suppression of who I am as Life that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to consider that the reason for the fear of not being taken care of when we get old and thus, require our children to take care of us, is due to a self interest world system that we've created ourselves wherein, if we don't have money nor children, we won't be taken care by the system and thus, we have created characters as the caring children to ensure our survival in this world without realizing that we've ignored the real creation that we require to create - a world system that is best for all so that caring as a living expression of the word would be unconditional, as a self responsibility for all that are here, equal and one, regardless their culture, religion, skin colour, status etc.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed to see my starting point in my creation of me as the caring daughter or mother wherein within that care, I've been trying to control the relationship that I've created to keep me in character.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that I've created me as the caring daughter/mother due to my fear of lose and I haven't realize that the fear of lose is just another character that I've created to not see that I'm in character and within that, not see me as LIFE that is eternal as who I am and within that blindness and ignorance, I believed that when my loved one dies, there is a part of me that I would lose and thus, I have to make sure that this part of me will never dies as I take care if that part and within that, I have failed to see, realize and understand equality and oneness as life that is eternal because I've separated myself from myself as life through defining death as the end without realizing that EVERYTHING has always been here, will always remain here as I'm here.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself as fear of survival character, to design and manifest the Caring daughter character to ensure one's future financial stability as the desire for more money character, where the desire for money character would desire to receive a bigger portion of the heritage when one's parents would die due to one's caring character throughout the parents' life.

I commit myself to show that the Care character that we dress ourselves within and as, is not the living expression and practical application of the word 'Care' as it is done within the starting point of self interest desire for an experience as a reward.

I commit myself to show how we have imprinted the memory experience of rewards in relation to our Care towards others which has then become our starting point within walking the word Care.

I commit myself to show that the way 'Care' is being lived nowadays is within and as FEAR that drives us unconsciously and that FEAR is due to our understanding of how the system currently work and function as we've created this reality within the starting point of self interest and thus, it is our responsibility to recreate this existence within and as principle of oneness and equality by clearing up the mess that we have manifested within and without.

I commit myself to create a system that will take care of all individual equally and the fear of not being taken care of when we grow older will not be our primary reason for a character creation that will take care of us but rather all our creations will be from within and as that which is best for all LIVES.

I commit myself to show that the establishment of Equal Money System will diminish the inherited design of fear of the future and within that, the desire for money. That will bring about humanity that truly care for each other as part of who we are as the realization of absolute self responsibility for ourselves and existence as a whole.

Maximizing Pleasure - Day 65

 I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that my pleasure is defined within the idea that I've attached to what pleasure is, the energetic charge that I've connected to it and the experience that I desire to have within it as an accepted past memory experience that I've associating to; none of which is a self expression within and as myself, as who I am, but rather accepted pre-program design that I follow in total separation form myself and this world.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see that for me to have access to pleasurable activities in this world, I must have Money because money firstly provides my basic needs within which I firstly derive simple pleasures from such as fresh water, food and a roof over my head and through this I forgive myself that I have attached pleasure with an external activity in separation of me and I haven't realized that Self Pleasure is an expression of me that I give to myself through my participation in and as LIFE. However, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that Self Pleasure as expression of Who I am can only exists when and as my basic needs are met (Food, shelter, clothes, health care etc.) and I'm no longer occupied with my physical survival and thus, it is my responsibility as an interdependent part of this world as a whole, to make sure that the basic needs of each and every being in this world would meet and the opportunity to express ourselves as self pleasure is Here for all.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define pleasure in external experience in separation of me and through seeking for the experience, I've locked myself down in my own little bubble of my mind, taking care of my own self interest pleasurable moments without consider anything or anyone else but me.

I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to see that my ideas with regards to worldly pleasures are prompt via the media as a form of brainwashing, to feed the system with more money movement as energy from our own energy movement as a desire for a self interest experience within and as pleasure.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to seek for and go after experiences that gives me the utmost pleasure in my Life and within that, have abdicated my responsibility of making sure that all beings on earth will all have equal opportunities to maximize their pleasure within having equal access to earth's resources and within that, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have failed to see how I've been preoccupied in my mind within the self interest desire for a specific type of pleasure experience and I haven't seen that all beings on earth deserve to have pleasurable physical experiences but yet they cannot as pleasure is can only be achieved by those who have money who are able to take care of their basic living needs. Those who don't have money, are busy focusing on their survival and cannot afford a moment of self pleasure in their daily pain and suffering.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that the experience of Pleasure can only be pursuit if one has Money to be able to fulfil one's self interest desire for pleasure and within that, we have not taken into consideration the enslavement of others who make it happen for us to experience the pleasurable activities which within that, their experience is of survival and has nothing to do with actual pleasure.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to justify why it's ok for me to participate and indulge in pleasurable activities as well as to justify why it's ok having slaves for me to have my pleasure experience that I believe I deserve to have.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that the more money I have, the more I can fuel my self interest desire for pleasure and within it, I haven't even stopped once to question the nature of my desire, who is getting hurt in the process of providing me with my experience of pleasure and what are the consequences when and as I pursue my desire for my happiness within my EXPERIENCE of pleasure.

I commit myself to establish and walk towards a world where all are entitled for a fulfilling and pleasurable life where the fear of physical survival is removed by creating a world system that is best for all. And within that, I stand for the Equal Money System 'Well-Being' Goal:

The Equal Money System will Study the Psychological Well-Being of Humans to Ensure a Lifestyle free of Fear. The focus will be on Supporting Life to Practically Live Fulfillment and Happiness in Ways where Self-Gratification will not Harm any Living Being or the Environment. This is to Ensure the continuation of Earth as an Effective Resource for the Enjoyment of Future Generations.

I commit myself to show the harm and abuse that is being allowed within our current world system where being are being enslaved for the sake of the Elite's Pleasurable activities as well as the harm that it cause to the world resources where the pleasurable activities over use the resources without consideration whatsoever.

I commit myself to show that when one's basic needs are met, one can apply self pleasure as an expression within oneself without the requirement of any external stimulation to give one's a sense of pleasure.

I commit myself to show that our ideas of pleasure has nothing to do with self pleasure as an expression but rather a self interest desire for one's own fulfilment/experience that one has accepted as oneself in separation of oneself and existence as a whole.

Blinded by Love - Day 47

This is a continuation of my previous blog: How to Choose a Partner – Day 21

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to seek for the experience of LOVE where my entire human physical body feels light, when everything seems to be alright and having a smile on my face without any particular reason and I haven't seen that those experience/moments are a imprints that I've downloaded into myself through watching Romantic movies and that those moments/experiences are momentary and as such, cannot be a real physical expression because if it was real, it would have been me who direct the smile, the light feeling body and it wasn't an energetic experience that was based on external forces magically just happened.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to prompt my children with Love stories and Movies and I haven't realized the implication of my doing - programming to become an individual self interests beings that move and direct oneself according to the child desires to fulfil one purpose of surviving instead of educating my child with a practical commons sense of what does it means to practically LOVE within the principle of Love thy neighbor as thyself wherein the physical living application of Love can be measured within the establishment world that is best for all LIVES.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have refused to see that LOVE is a delusional mind fuck that one is participating with because when one experience LOVE, one is closed down to one's own mind where for a moment, everything seems to be OK and fine regardless of this world not being OK and fine and thus, we spend our lives, seeking for the experience of LOVE in self interest, for a moment of bliss and while doing that, separating ourselves form the real LIFE that is here, a LIFE that is not worth living for the majority of this world and instead of walking the living expression of LOVE in making sure that all could have a dignified LIFE, we have been preoccupying ourselves with the energetic feeling of Love that is in no way a living application of LOVE that is best for all

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be blind by LOVE and thus, missed and ignored the obvious points that require corrections within the relationships/agreements that I've walked and within that, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to make the decision of walking an agreement/relationship with a partner based on feelings and emotions while disregarding the functionality of walking an agreement with another in terms of our processes, sexual alignment , our financial stability and thus, take all the variables and make an informative decision that is based on practicality instead of emotions/feelings so that we could walk together, in alignment in this ONE life.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to - when being in a relationship/agreement, to fall into the trap of LOVE as an energetic experience and thus, seclude myself from the LIFE that is here, right in front of me; LIFE that required direction and major change so that all could have a LIFE that is worth LIVING and I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see the deception in LOVE as a design to make people stuck in their own bubble of self interest while disregarding LIFE and the change that is required to be walked in terms of the LIVING application of LOVE that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see how one is attempting to control the experience of LOVE through compromising and limiting oneself and this world through blinding and closing one's eyes so that the experience of LOVE could remain for just one more moment regardless the huge RED FLAGS that are lighting all over, screaming for correction and change in oneself, in the relationship/agreement and in this world.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to learn form my past mistakes and correct my application with regards to choosing a partner and thus, time after time after time, I find myself looping the same points and becoming angry at myself for falling into the same trap because I gave value to the LOVE experience and I didn't allow myself to let it go even though I've already seen that the experience isn't real and can only last for so long before it disappear and one remain with a fucked up reality, remain with picking up the pieces and stand up again, only to return to the same point that one faced in the beginning with no actual and real self change.

I commit myself to expose and show that the current Media is prompting Love from the starting point of keeping the individuals secluded in their mind so that they won't be able to even consider walking the physical application of 'love thy neighbor as thyself' and stand up for LIFE that is best for all because they are too occupied in their self interest little bubble of their mind while those who control the media can keep making profit on the backs of their brainwashed consumers.

I commit myself to show and reveal what does it mean to actually LOVE as an application of the principle of what is best for all rather than how love is currently walked as an individual pursuit of happiness in total separation from oneself and one's world.

I commit myself to stop making decisions based on emotions and feelings such as LOVE and instead, make informative decisions that are based on practical common sense and consideration of myself, others and essentially everything and everyone.

I'm letting go of the desire to experience LOVE as an energetic momentary experience because I realized that the design of LOVE as we walk today is a delusional mind fuck that keeps us preoccupied in our mind, in a zombified state of selfish beings that consider only of themselves and disregards the entirety of this world.

Please watch my Vlog - 2012 - LOVE Month -Is Love and Light the Solution?

Sickness as imaginary Friend - Day 36

* this post is a continuation from yesterday's post: - How to prevent Sickness - Day 35

Disclaimer - Within this blog, I'm writing about a specific living experience that I've defined as sickness which was not a physical condition thus, with any sickness/illness/element/physical discomfort, make sure to always to consult a medical practitioner to get the necessary physical support and assistance.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself a world system that is educating and teaching children how to avoid their responsibilities with faking sickness via the Media as Movies and TV series.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed as a child in this world to fake sickness to get attention because children knows that their parents fear that the child is really sick and so, act on the fear with accepting the sickness and giving the child attention.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself as a parent in this world to fear for my children health so greatly that I had to accept my child faking sickness as if it was true and within that, I've failed to see that my responsibility as a parent is to educate my child to have Life skills to be able to face what ever is required to be face in Breath instead of developing alternative coping mechanism such as faking sickness.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world were children are not able to communicate with their parents openly and share what is going on inside themselves because the parent perception of Life might be different from the child perception of life and thus the children found that faking sickness is effective as a get away solution from that which they do not know how to face and direct.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fake sickness as a child in this world because there was something that I didn't want to face in school but because I didn't know how to direct it or communicate about it, I've manipulated my parents because I knew that they will not take the chance of sending me to school when I'm sick.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world system where the children are not provided with Life Skills tools to assist and support themselves in this physical reality which led them to find alternative solution to cope with their reality by faking sickness.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world system where the parents do not have Life skills as well as parenting skills and thus, when facing a child that is faking a disease, they must believe the child because they wouldn't take the chance that the child is really sick due to their fear of their children's health without facing the fear and correct themselves to be able to assist and support their child to face reality and direct themselves within this world effectively.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed as a pediatrician in this world to accept fake disease because I wouldn't take the chance that there is something that I've missed even though the physical evidence show differently because I fear that I will be accused with medical malpractice and I haven't realized the consequences of my acceptance of the children's fake diseases and how it will effect their life in the years to come.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed the children in this world to not be educated and supported by their parents to practically live and express themselves to be able to become an effective human beings in this world to such an extent that children are manipulating their parents through faking sickness because that is the solution that is currently provided for them to cope with this reality.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fake sickness as a grown up when I didn't want to go to work because through childhood I've used this tool to avoid my responsibilities.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to take a day off with being direct about it and thus, believed that I have to fake a disease.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to participate in the morality design that faking a disease to avoid going to work is wrong and thus, to feel good about myself for not going to work, I've manifested a physical disease so that I could feel good about myself that I'm not really lying.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to within faking sickness to avoid going to work, accepted the morality design of my doing and thus, to validated and reasoning the sickness, I've accepted the sickness to such an extent that I've become it and thus manifested it as a physical discomfort.

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to consider investigate the reason why I do not want to go to work to see what is it that I'm hiding from myself and accordingly sort myself and direct myself, I've faked a disease because that is the tool that I've learn from my childhood to avoid my responsibilities.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed a world system where beings require to fake a disease to avoid going to work and I've failed to see the fault in the current money system of promoting stress in the name of survival without any practical support and thus, beings who are not educated to support themselves within this reality, find the easy way out by getting sick and within that, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed the sickness manipulation in this world because I would rather accept it than look at the faults of this current money system and actually doing something to change the system to a system that practically support LIFE.

I commit myself to develop education system to provide life skills for everyone in all age spectrums and within that, assist and support parents to have parenting skills to assist and support their children to be and become effective human beings who are actually and practically living and expressing themselves breath by breath.

I commit myself to assist and support the children in this world to have LIFE skills so that they can face what ever comes up in their reality and effectively direct it.

I commit myself to Establish a support system to all beings on earth so that sickness manipulation won't be required and beings could direct themselves effectively in this world without harming and abusing themselves and their human physical body.

I commit myself to research and investigate how to assist and support human being to be and become self responsible human beings who do not require any excuses such as faking sickness to avoid their responsibility within an Equal Money System

I commit myself to educate and investigate the human mind to be able to assist and support myself as well as others in this world.

I commit myself to develop and establish an educational curriculum that will be based on Life skills that children  are required to become effective in their living application