A year passed by - Day 481

Gian was mentioning the other day that when ever someone speak about Bernard, they speak about him in a present tense; and I was looking at this point for myself of how to me Bernard is still 'here' as the principles that he stood as and lived by - this, could  never die with him.

 

His death was a challenge to say the least - having to 'grow up' from Bernard's protective shell and finding my own feet within myself. Learning to trust myself, learning to direct and move myself, learning to develop communication skills that are based on support to one another, learning to live independently and yet interdependent with the people around me; learning to consider myself and others, learning to care for myself and others, learning to be patience with myself and others.

 

Bernard, in his presence, showed us the way and the tools to develop these potentials inside ourselves but it was up to us to stand up and walk these potentials, as principles for ourselves and each other. With his death, we had to make the ultimate decision of who we are and what we stand for though for and for us, there was never a question - we just stood and continued walking, together, with absolute support to one another.

 

Cerise mentioned today in her blog:

In order for us to really grow we had to step out from under the protection that Bernard gave us. It may not have been his intention to shelter us, but he did nonetheless. He would weather a storm if it meant another wouldn't have to. We got too comfortable in the safety and guidance he naturally gave out, we did not move ourselves. The only way that we could really stand up on our own was for him to die - we were not doing it on our own

 

Indeed - those who knew Bernard realized this point for themselves - that for us to grow and expand ourselves, he had to die as we didn't take the responsibility to stand up when he was alive - we were all hoping that we could find a ways to change without actively and physically changing ourselves.

 

Bernard's death in many ways showed us the consequences of when waiting for someone else to walk that which we have to walk ourselves. Realizing this now will not change the past but we can change the future where we no longer wait for consequences to manifest but instead we walk the prevention process as solutions that can be physically applied.

 

Therefore, I will not repeat the same mistake again in waiting for someone to pave the way for me instead of me paving the way for myself; I will not sit back and wait for the world to fix itself, I will become the solution myself. I will not wait until the world reaches the point of no return, I will stand up and create a future that is best for all.

 

So, in looking at the past year - what we have created together thus far and whom we have become - I am grateful for having Bernard in our lives and more so, I am grateful for the opportunity to walk with the people whom are walking with me. we have walked a long way and the road ahead is not an easy one to walk but I am certain that together we will pave the way to create future that is worth living. If anything, this was what Bernard showed us in his death.

Emotional Attachment and Physical connection (Part 1) - Day 460

(Note – I started writing this blog 2 weeks ago, so the events that took place was in alignment to when the blog was written)

 

More than a year ago, I shared about my relationship towards Babitjie, one of our cats that had died. (How to Deal with a Death of our Pet - Part 2 - Day 249). Since than, it took me a while to connect again to another animal because unconsciously, I didn't want to experience again the feeling of losing a loved animal.

 

In the past couple of months, I started connecting again with the dogs that lives with us and especially with Gracie, Blackie and Zack as they are the primary dogs that spend their time with me.

 

3 weeks ago, Gracie started showing a problem with her ears - we have been taking her to the vet couple of times since then, to find a treatment that will work for her. Today, they had to give her anesthetics so that they can see better what is going on inside her ears. They found the problem and Gracie returned home to recover from the anesthetics but a few hours later, the Vet called and said that we have to take her in again next week because the blood test were indecisive.

 

The moment I heard that, there was a reaction within myself. The first words that came from my mouth were: "but why every animal I'm getting attached to is dying". The interesting thing is that Gracie isn't dying and we don't even know what the blood tests mean and besides, it’s not that all the animals are dying, it  was only Babitjie that had died and there are so many other animals that I have connection with, and they are perfectly ok. What was also interesting was the specific words that I spoke out of reaction: "Attached to" - which carried emotional energetic charge to it.

 

So I started looking at my reactions and where it all came from:

1. Gracie's Nature is extremely similar to my dog that I left behind when I moved to the farm. I was extremely attached to my dog, Yalda, and it took me months to release the emotional connection that I formed within myself however, the characteristics that Yalda has, are very similar to Gracie's so forming a relationship connection with Gracie was very natural.

2. How Gracie in particular and the pack in general stand as stable point in my life whereas, they are always here when I wake up, they are always here when I go to sleep, they are always here when I come home... And within that, I never feel alone. 

 

Will continue opening these points more in my next blog as well as practically showing how I am working with points (reactions) that comes up in my reality in terms of how I assist and support myself with investigating points within myself through writing these blogs.

My Relationship with my Dog - Self Forgiveness - Day 254

 

Continuing with investigating my Relationship with Yalda, the dog I used to have before I moved to the Farm.

This is a continuation to my Previous blog: My Relationship with My Dog Continue - Day 253 where I shared the Time Line of my Relationship with Yalda after walking the previous write-ups: My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251 and Pets as a reflection of Self Intimacy - Day 252 which was also a direct continuation to the Series:  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet'.

 

I would also suggest to listen to the Interviews: Pets and Owners Relationship Review to have a better understanding of the relationship connection between Human Beings and Dogs.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to in Self Honesty look at my starting point of having a dog and within that, ignored and further suppressed the Emotions I had accepted and allowed myself to experience within and as me. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that my decision of having a dog was a reaction to the emotions and feelings I experienced inside myself, which means that it was a matter of time until my Physical reality would knock on my door and force me to face the things I was so busy suppressing and ignoring, which in this, I only prolong my process within a time-loop that I could have prevented if I would have taken the responsibility to investigate, explore and sort out that which I've suppressed within and as me.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to suppressed, ignore and deny the Negative experience that I've created within and as myself through having a dog and develop a relationship with her so that I won't have to 'Feel' alone. Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Investigate the Nature of the Negative Experiences of and as Aloneness within the Self Realization that in common sense, one is never alone within and as this physical reality and it is only through One's Mind-Interpretation of Aloneness, within and as Emotional Negative Charge that one had Separated oneself from all that is here, into and as an Isolated Version of oneself, within and as One's mind.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Accept myself as Who I am and thus, I had Believed that I required External Forces to Validate me and so, through the Presence of a Dog, I could Respect, Accept and Care for myself, not seeing, realizing and understanding that Who I am as an Expression of Respect, Acceptance and Care is not dependent on anything or anyone but myself, as a decision that I make within and as myself. Thus, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Learn by the Example I've set forth for myself, of who and what I am, when and as I was in the presence of my Dog - An expression of myself, of who I am under all the Layers of the Mind, Without any protection mechanism, absolute vulnerability and Self Intimacy and thus, When and as I remove these layers of the mind and accept myself as Who I am as Life, I will Find myself - that which I was always looking for but couldn't find because I've separated myself to the extent of which I couldn't even grasp that - that which I was always looking for, was myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that What I miss with regards to my Dog's presence is Who I have been as an expression of myself, as how I've experienced myself when I was with her, when I didn't have to become a specific character to align myself with my environment and I could have been simply Me, as an Expression of myself, without worrying about being judged, mocked, harmed or Compromised. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realized that I've CONditioned myself to my environment and gave Value to what other may say or think about me instead of accepting and allowing myself to simply be the expression of myself, as who I am in every given moment.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that what I have perceived and projected as Intimacy with my Dog, was in fact a level of intimacy that I've had with myself which was lost when I gave away my Dog. In that, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to React to my Dog not being with me any longer instead of investigating my relationship with her - who I am within the relationship, How did I experienced myself, Why and How have I separated myself within my relationship with my dog and according to what I've seen through self investigation, I change, correct and align myself within the Principle of Investigate all points and keep that which is good.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Give myself Unconditional Love, Respect and Worth and have accepted and allowed myself to instead project these components onto my Dog, believing that she gave me Love, Respect and Worth and thus reacted when I believed that I no longer have it instead of realizing that I can stand in alignment to Self Love, Self Respect and Self Worth, as an Expression of myself, in any given moment.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to seek for Love, Respect and Worth from my external reality, in separation of myself, not Seeing, realizing and understanding that I've separated myself from such expressions, within the belief that only someone else, in separation of myself, can give me Love, Respect and Worth. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to Desire being Loved, Respected and Cared for while Expecting to find someone or something that would give  me the Love, the Respect and Worth instead of me First Establish Self Love, Self Respect and Self Worth that is not Defined by anything or anyone; that is Not Conditioned to having a partner or a pet, but simply an expression of myself that would be measured by the Decisions that I make in every breath. Thus, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to Project Love, Respect and Worth onto another and in doing so, never considered to Develop and Establish Self Love, Self Respect and Self Worth, as Who I am, as an Expression of myself that can be proven and validated by the Decisions that I make within what I will accept and allow to myself and what I will not.

 

I Commit myself to Show that Attaching and Associating Energetic Charge to our Pets and/or Partners, either Positive or Negative, indicates a point within and as ourselves that we haven't yet sorted out, through which, we suppress, ignore and deny our responsibility in sorting ourselves out by Projecting these Energy Experiences with onto our pets and/or Partners.

 

I Commit myself to Let Go of the Energetic Mind Components that I've associated, defined and attached to my relationship to my Dog and accordingly, keep on investigating the things she was busy showing me about myself, that I wasn't willing to see and take responsibility for.

 

I Commit myself to Develop, Establish and Stand as an Expression of Self Love, Self Respect and Self Worth that would be Measurable within the Decisions that I make within that which I accept and allow myself and that which I won't.

 

I Commit myself to - When and as I see myself accessing Inner Emotional Turmoil regarding my dog, to first make the decision to Stop, to take a Breath and See in self honesty what is the Nature of the Reaction and Who I am within this reaction. In this, I commit myself to assist and support myself to see where, how and why I have separated myself from the Physical through/by Energy acceptance and allowances and accordingly, I take Self Responsibility, Apply Self Forgiveness with Specific Practical Commitment which within that, I transform my application from Mind to a Physical Living.

 

I Commit myself to - When and as I see myself projecting Experiences on other beings in my world and my environment, to turn the point back to myself and to investigate where, why and how I've separated myself from such experiences, where, why and how I've defined myself as Lacking in relation to such Experiences.

 

 

My Relationship with My Dog Continue - Day 253

 

Continuing with investigating my Relationship with Yalda, the dog I used to have before I moved to the Farm.

This is a continuation to my Previous blog: My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251 and Pets as a reflection of Self Intimacy - Day 252 which was also a direct continuation to the Series:  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet'.

 

I would also suggest to listen to the Interviews: Pets and Owners Relationship Review to have a better understanding of the relationship connection between Human Beings and Dogs

 

So I got Yalda at a time where I felt extremely alone. Even though I was surrounded by Friends and huge Social network, inside myself, I felt very much alone. Only now, after walking Process for quite some time, I can pinpoint the reason and purpose why I deliberately created this aloneness inside myself and how it was a defense mechanism that I utilized to protect me from getting hurt again. I will share this point in another blog though.

 

With Yalda, the Aloneness wasn't as extensive anymore because there was always someone who loved me; Someone who would unconditionally make me laugh; be there when I cry; play with me; comes to walks with me; Someone who would never judge me or look down at me; someone who will always be happy when they see me and someone who would be extremely sad when I'm gone; This relationship made feel Loved, desirable, cared for - all the components that I was looking for from a partner however, it was constant, no Dramas, no roller-coaster, no getting hurt. And so, I was ok with not having a partnership with a male because I got everything I wanted from her.

 

At some point, I went to India for 3 months and I heard that my dog was extremely sad and unhappy. I was devastated and felt guilty. Then a few days after, I've been told that her favourite toy was missing and I couldn't bear the thought of her not having the ball she likes so much. So I arranged a friend to go to the pet store, buy this toy and go to my house to give Yalda the toy. I also knew that Yalda will be happy to see him because he was part of Yalda's Life. But, after a while, I couldn't take it anymore, and I decided to go back home, earlier than expected because I missed my dog to much. Obviously, it wasn't the real reason. The reason was that I felt so alone in India, I was extremely sick for about a month which activated and perpetuated lots of emotions and feelings within myself and also, the relationship I started to develop fell apart.

 

When I got back, a friend of mine came to pick me up from the airport and brought Yalda with her. When I saw Yalda in the airport, I couldn't help it and started crying from happiness, it's like my other half was finally coming to completion after 3 months apart. Yalda was absolutely happy to see me, didn't stop jumping all over me, and all the people around was in awe from this sight - me and Yalda and our special connection.

 

So, you see, Yalda became my Life, my Escape place where I could feel Safe, complete and whole, where I could suppress the depression and the aloneness I felt inside myself without having to sort myself out.

 

When I made the decision to move to the farm, I knew that I had to give her away. I knew that the day would come and I will have to let her go. I wished that my family will take her so that when I come to visit, I could be with her but they couldn't have her and I had to find a solution for her. I found an amazing family to raise her, with 2 young kids and a mother that works from home.

 

The first time they came to see her, not yet take her, I crashed. I couldn't stop crying. Yalda felt it and decided to not come out and see them. I had to really push myself to breathe and ask her to go out to see them.

I tried to keep her as much as I could until the very last moment of having to move out of the apartment and fly to the farm.

After 2 weeks the day had come and it was unbearable. It was a day where I literally couldn't stop crying, and even now, as I write, tears fill my eyes because it was a very sad moment for me. It was like giving away a part of me, my child. She didn't want to go which made it even harder for me. I knew that I couldn't see her again because if I would, she may think that I came to pick her up again.

 

It wasn't that obvious to me until I went to see her after a few days. I wanted to make sure that the family treats her alright and that she is comfortable. When I went up, while being in the elevator, I could hear her barking, she smelled me, she knew I was coming. She started scratching the doors and when she saw me, it was like at the Airport moment. But this time, I couldn't take her home with me again. The new Owner told me that the moment I push the ring bottom, Yalda knew it was me and become over energetic. Which was hard for me to hear because I couldn't understand how am I doing this to her and to myself. But I did understand, I understood that Yalda did her Part, she supported me greatly and it is now time for her to support other people and for me to go and support myself and other people, in a new environment.

 

I haven't seen her since. I mean, I do see picture of her when the owner upload pictures to her FaceBook account. But I never met her physically again.

I was twice in Israel since I moved to the Farm. In neither of the times I went to see her. The reason was - it was time for me to not only think about myself and to place myself in her shoes before making any decision. Meaning, I used to leave her couple of times when I went for a few months abroad. Every time that I left, she was sad, and every time that I came back she was again happy. She had to adjust to the new family and I didn't want to create expectation within her, that I'm coming to take her home, which then, she would have to re-adjust again to the new family. I had to push myself to not fall into my own self interest and not go see her while I was in Israel. There were moments where I drove by her house, to see if maybe, the owners is walking down the street with her and I could have a snap pick of my 'child' but I didn't allow myself to actually arrange a visit despite of the owners calling me saying I must visit.

 

Every now and then I hear stories about her from the new owners. Which makes me feel extreme longing for her expression, like, the experience the owner has with her, with Yalda's expression is what I miss and would like to experience myself.

 

So lot's of work to be done because despite of the Physical let go of her, I didn't let her go from within me. It's one thing to miss her expression but it is another thing to cry every time I think about her. So, I will start investigating this point for myself and share when I'm ready to share. So stay tuned.

 

My Last Picture with Yalda:

 

 

 

 

 

Pets as a reflection of Self Intimacy - Day 252

This is a continuation to my Previous blog: My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251 which was also a direct continuation to the Series:  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet'.

 

I would also suggest to listen to the Interviews: Pets and Owners Relationship Review to have a better understanding of the relationship connection between Human Beings and Dogs.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to Express myself and allow myself to approach new human beings without fear of rejections and judgement and I could only do it when there is an animal presence to support me to feel comfortable and safe within and as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that I've projected my Strength and my expression onto my Dog, as if she was the reason why I was able to express myself and approach human being and getting to know them and within this, haven't realized that my dog was standing as a reflection of me, of who and what I am and she was simply showing me the component that I have within and as me which I am able to stand as who I am, regardless of her presence.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to utilize my dog as a source of power and confident to approach human being and getting to know them and I haven't allowed myself to explore who I am within approaching human beings and develop effective communication with them with or without her presence.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use my dog to avoid certain people within the excuse that my dog needs me because I felt uncomfortable to be directive in my expression and communication and simply walk away when I saw that the human beings are abusive in nature and there is no way I can assist and support them from where they are within their processes. Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize how I have limited and compromised myself when I was not directive within and as myself as I allowed the morality codes to decide for me how I behave and act instead of seeing self honestly, in the moment, what would be the best approach to direct each and every point and go for it within absolute self trust, without having to use excuses and justification to present myself as nice to others, to not hurt their feelings. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see how I have manipulated myself to believe that I don't want to hurt people feelings instead of seeing the core of the fear which is the fear of being judged, mocked and defined as unpleasant. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed the fear of conflict and friction with other human beings to be my directive principle instead of walking according to a principle that would bring about the best for all outcome in every moment of breath, regardless the others onions, judgement, definition of me.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear that people would judge my expression and define me as aggressive when and as I am being directive within my communication and thus, I utilized my dog as an excuse to avoid conversation with people that activated specific emotions and feelings within and as myself instead of first, turn the point back to myself and investigate what was the nature/source/core of such feelings and emotions and sort myself out so that I could direct the moment effectively regardless their judgement and definitions towards me. 

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear being and becoming intimate with other human beings and therefor, when and as moments of intimacy emerged where I could transcend the fears and become vulnerable in in allowing others to get know me and vice versa, I immediately went towards my dog, diverting my attention towards her and expressed intimacy with her and kept distance from the beings that I could have been intimate in communication with.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear Intimacy with human beings and therefor, developed intimacy with Animals because they cannot hurt me, manipulate me and leave me when things get a little bit uncomfortable and tough. In this, I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to trust myself to NOT attach any emotional value to Intimacy and simply stand as an expression of intimacy within and as me and thus, I avoided Intimacy with human beings and projected it onto animals so that I won't have to face my issues and could remain in fear, very much suppressed without ever sorting myself out.

 

I commit myself to investigate my Fears of Intimacy and to assist and support me in becoming an expression of intimacy within and as myself. In this, I Commit myself to discover my own relationship with intimacy and to sort out what ever issues I may find within and as myself.

 

I commit myself to allow myself to get to know people for who they are for real, to approach human beings with no previous judgement, opinions and ideas about them and within that, allow them to also get to know me which through that relationship, I commit myself to expand, grow and empower myself with the assistance and support of others as a reflection and mirroring of me.

 

I commit myself to allow myself to stand vulnerable with other human beings and to let go of all the protection mechanisms that I've created within and as my mind as I now see, realize and understand that what I was missing was Self Trust in moving and directing myself, in any given moment and therefor, utilize Mind Personalities to define and tell me who I am in any given moment.

 

I commit myself to assist and support myself to develop absolute self trust within and as myself and in this, to develop absolute self intimacy with myself because I realized that unless I sort out my own self intimacy issues, I won't be able to develop intimacy in self honesty with others and if I won't be able to develop intimacy with others, I won't be able to develop intimacy with all livings beings in existential level, in equality and oneness.

My Dog as my Comfort Zone - Day 251

 

 

This is a continuation to the Series -  'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet':

 

Today, I will be investigating one Dimension within my relationship with my dog, Yalda, due to a point opened up yesterday. But first, I will share the Time Line of Events so that one could follow the reason for the point that had opened up.

 

As I've shared, we experienced on the farm a wave of unexpected Death of Animals that had now extended to a Domino effect wherein Grootman, Fidelis's horse, Physically reacted to the Lose of Titan and become Extremely Sick with a Colic diseas, to the extent of us having to be with him 24/7 to monitor his health. It seems that he pass through the hard phase and he is now alright.

Yesterday, when I was spending a moment with Esteni and Robert, Maite came to see us and called us to run towards the stable to assist with Grootman. We had to keep him moving and in turns, we took him for a run. This event went on for an hour and that was an hour after Leila, Cerise, Gian and Fidelis were running with him.

 

At some stage, the horse Vet came and we were all there to support Grootman while receiving the treatment. We were all there for hours, waiting for him to stabilize with no results. There were moments when Grootman had to be sedated and injected with Pain Killers and we were sitting outside his stable, having conversations and you know - having "forced" to have communal evening with each other. If it wasn't for Grootman suffering in Pain and the circumstances of us gathering together, it could have been a pleasant and enjoyable night.

 

I've been on the farm for more than a year now and it was the first time I spend time with all the farm people together which made me wonder about why is it that only when consequences emerged, people come close to each other and stand as a support for each other. Why can't I just enjoy the company of others and arrange Communal Gathering in a spontaneous way, without having to have consequences that would place us together in the same time/space?

 

So today, I was looking at the point of my relationship with my Dog. What also supported me in opening up the points regarding the Relationship between Humans and Pets was the Dog's Life Review we recorded Yesterday.

 

What I have not realized within my Relationship with Yalda was the Mirroring System and what she was actually busy showing me which I wasn't willing to see, till today.

 

What was cool about having a dog is that the responsibility 'forces' me to get out of the house to allow the dog to pee and shit. What was also cool that almost everyone in my neighbourhood had a dog and accordingly, I met many new people Which I enjoyed as I got to know them.

I was always grateful for my dog for being the reason of meeting new people because without her, I wouldn't not approach new people and I would not dare to start conversations with strangers.  That is the point Yalda was showing me - that in essence, I didn't really had to have her around to be able to get to know new people, I could have simply do it, approach people, with no fear. But.. I didn't saw it.

 

Yalda was my comfort zone, the thing that I could either get close to the people that I wanted to get close to, or either go away from those that I didn't want to get involved with. And on a certain level, she could sense who I didn't like and who I liked and accordingly support me in giving me the door to choose how I want her to behave in every single moment.

 

I didn't feel alone with her - I could go to the beach when ever I wanted, without having to schedule it with anyone to come with, I could go at night and take a walk in the dark, I could do what ever I wanted, as long as she was with me. The moment we were apart, I felt uncomfortable, that something is missing and I did what ever I could to go back and be with her. It was to the extreme where if a friend didn't allow me to bring her with me, I didn't went to see them, they had to come visit me. And lol, after a while, I quit my job and found other jobs where she could come and join me.

 

Anyway - the point is that - Yalda, or Animlas, give us the 'excuse' to develop Relationships, open for us a door to start talking to people and get to know them. what I haven't realized was - that the point that held me from doing the same without her was Fear.

 

I'll go up to here for today and continue with Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective application tomorrow.

Our Responsibility and Accountability for Each Death that could have been Prevented - Day 250

Here I am continuing walking the 'How to Cope with the Death of a Pet' series which I've started walking when Babitjie (Cat) died 2 days ago from Kidney Failure which also followed by the Death of Titan (Horse) due to extensive and aggressive unexpected cancer. Within this blog, my focus will be on Human Intervention and the Existential Consequences that resulted with the abuse and suffer of the Animal Kingdom; abuse and suffering that could have been Prevented if Human Beings would have been Aware, considerate and compassionate.

 

Before I start, there is a quote I'd like to bring forth:

 

"...as has been mentioned within the Animal Life Review Series, how Human Intervention interfered with the Equilibrium between the environment/weather and the earth/animal/insect/plant Kingdoms and created an complete imbalance in/as so many physical relationships, that it has forced all such parts/dimensions/beings in/as/of this Physical Existence into and as states of Survival/Compensation. This has caused an outflow-consequence within and as the Physical Relationships in/as this Physical Existence – from some parts of the Earth becoming inhabitable, to the extinction of animal/nature Species, to the Pollution of rains, to the unpredictability of weather conditions and its according consequences in its relationship to the Earth/Environment. To which human beings would attribute further consequence, because with the physical changing its relationships according to the Human Factor – the Human will then accordingly Respond to the changes the Physical made, because of the Human - to Survive, and more often than not; the human will ‘respond’ to Physical Changes – at the Sacrifice of the physical, the earth, the environment and all species, from the minute, to the small to the great within and as it. “Conquering” the Physical – well, the consequence of the Human Factor in its relationship to the Physical is clearly becoming evident, as the Physical, especially now within the bacterial, virus, microscopic, micro-organism dimensions/parts/particles is definitively showing who in this relationship between Man and Physical is in fact in Control. I mean, human beings have not even 1 + 1’d this Equation in the relationship between ourselves and the Physical with how Little human’s awareness in fact extend to understanding the Complexity of the interrelationships within our own Physical Bodies, let alone Existence as a whole…" Heaven's Journey to Life - Consciousness + Time = Doomsday? - Day 245

 

And:

 

"...Each time an animal has to be put down as the result of undue suffering – it is testimony to our legacy of fucked-up-ness.

Each time a child dies of starvation, while it could have been provided for, but we didn’t care to create and structure the world in a way to make it possible for all to live a dignified Life – it is a testimony to our fucked-up-ness.

I’ve dealt with a lot of deaths on the farm, and this is the one point that keeps on striking me, because most of the time the death was not a natural death where an animal’s life had been lived to completion – but most of the time the death was the result of consequence as a ‘negative side-effect’ of the world we’ve produced and participate in, which means it was each time an untimely death that could have been prevented…" Leila's Journey to Life - Day 146: Death of a Horse

 

 

So - for a long time I didn't want to face my Self interest within it all to see my accountability and responsibility for each and every Death that could have been Prevented. I couldn't connect the dots to see my direct relationship with the Manifested consequences as the current abuse, suffering of Humans and Animals.

It was only a few days ago where I could finally see this point for myself, while writing a blog Review on Derren Brown's TV show: Derren Brown Expose - Crowed behaviour is Evil - Day 246: "...What was not exposed in this show is the Indirectly Crowd Behaviour of us human being, that have the means and power to change the fate of this world, to prevent the birth of children to a world of abuse and instead to prepare the way before them to birth into world that will take care of them, from birth till death.

Understand, our Silent Expression is still an expression of what we accept and allow and what we will not. The fact we do nothing to change the face of this world indicate our Evil Expression of Human Beings…"

 

So now I understand why and how I'm directly accountable and responsible for each and every unnecessary death in this world - because I have the means and access to stand up and stand as and example in this world and yet, I haven't done so to my full potential. Each one of us that sit back and allow this world to continue in it's current manifestation is accountable and responsible for each and every death that couldn't have been prevented if we were to change the world system.

 

There can be no Excuses, no Justification, no Blame. We must Realize and Understand that our Silence is the Voice that accept and allow the abuse, harm, crime, war, suffering, diseases, etc. in this world. Let's stop the Silence and make sure our Voice is Heard and that our Voice is standing in alignment to the Principle of 'What is best for all Lives on Earth'.

You must understand - there is no one that would come and save us, there is not magic pill we can take to sort everything out, there is no last minute bail-out.

 

Educate yourself to understand what is really going on in this world to within that, understand your accountability and Responsibility:

 

Blind Spot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=pByCxG2dIWY

 

War on Democracy

http://johnpilger.com/videos/the-war-on-democracy

The Century of the Self: Part 1- Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

 

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

 

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

 

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/ 

 

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

 

 

Here is one of the Equal Money System Policies that is in direct relationship to what was discussed here. let's make sure this policy is coming to it's optimum manifestation: Stewardship

Within an Equal Money system it will be recognized that Humans are a part of the Ecosystem they live in. The word 'eco' stands for 'home' - and thus, each human will be responsible for maintaining the Balance and Harmony within their home, within their Ecosystem. This involves the Monitoring of the Well-Being of the Plants and Animals within one's Environment and to Intervene when Disharmony occurs as a result of Human Impact, so that a new Equilibrium can be established.

How to Deal with a Death of our Pets - Part 2 - Day 249

 

 

This series was started with the Death of Babitjie, a cat that I had created a relationship connection to, which I suggest reading through the blog I wrote yesterday for full context and understanding of this blog.

As I've opened up the point, I've seen multiple points to look at and investigate wherein the main/core point to be aware of is our Self Interest design within the Context of Pets in particular and Animals in general.

 

Unfortunately, we had another death on the farm - Titan, Gian's horse had to be put down immediately due to extensive cancer that suddenly emerged which caused with inability to drink and eat. There was also no treatment that could have cured him.

And yes, we had another death yesterday, this time it was a Duck but interestingly enough, I didn't give it much value. I didn't know about it but even if I knew, it wouldn't move me, I was to focused on the Death of Babitjie. which again, the questions I must ask myself are - why it is that I give value to a horse, a cat, a dog but nothing moves inside myself when a duck or a chicken dies? Why is it that nothing moves inside myself in every single moment of the day/night where lots of beings dies.

 

This has obviously to do with the extent of separation we have accepted and allowed within ourselves. This has to do with the extent of limitation we as human beings are consisting of and existing has. This has to do with our value systems that we have created, Morality, social norms. This has to do with are true Evil Nature of Self Interest.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to attach Positive Value to specific beings and Neutral Value to other beings and accordingly, activate or deactivate specific emotions and feelings, not seeing, realizing and understanding that either Positive/Negative or Neutral is still based on Separation and in the lack of understanding within absolute self realization of Equality and Oneness as a living Principle.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to care for the Animals that I attach a positive Value to and disregard the animals that I attach a negative or Neutral value to and within that I forgive myself that I haven't thus far investigated the nature of the Value I assign to Animals or Humans in separation of me as I see, realize and understand that feeling ashamed or guilty about it won't make a difference, won't assist and support me to stabilize and equalize myself but it is rather a coping mechanism, as a reaction, to avoid the real problem, the core of the problem, to not face the problem and change my approach from a Mind separation to Physical living application.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see that feeling sad over one being that had died in comparison to the millions beings that dies in every moment, implies separation which I've accepted and allowed and within that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the fact that I cannot feel anything for the beings that dies in every single moment, is how I would abdicate my responsibility as a human being with the means, sources and capability to actually stand up, investigate all points, investigate the outflows and consequences, investigate the starting point and the core of the problem, understand the problem in its totality and accordingly, make the decision to move, direct and walk myself into and as a solution that is best for all Lives, Equally.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that what I accept and allow in my direct environment is what I would accept and allow in the world system as a whole. Here, I've just realized that I had accepted and allowed myself to not give a moment of consideration to the Duck that had died but was all possessed by a cat that died at the very same day. Which is the same in the world system, I would not accept and allow the harm of my family and closest friends and would be possessed if anything will happen to them and yet, children and adults are dying every single second from Starvation, Malnutrition, dehydration and diseases and I do nothing to Prevent and stop this from ever manifesting again.

 

I commit myself to get myself to a point of Equality and Oneness with and as everything that is here, from the smallest to the greatest as I see, realize and understand the irrationality in accepting and allowing Separation to exists within and as me and the consequences of such acceptance and allowance both in my direct environment and in this world as a whole.

 

I commit myself to SHOW that what exists within, exists without and in that, what we accept and allow in our direct environment, is what we will accept and allow in our external environment which then thus, perpetuate the extent of the Problem as why and how we would ignore the cruelty that exists within this world through deliberately attach a Neutral/Negative value to the Majority of this world that are in great suffering so that we won't have to take responsibility for them in making sure to create a foundation/platform of a world that is best for all equally, exactly as we attach a neutral/negative value to the 'irrelevant' beings as we have defined them as irrelevant within our own minds, in separation, such as the Duck example that I've shared above but it can also be the ants that we walk over, the bugs, the flies, etc.