Showing posts with label Self Pity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Self Pity. Show all posts
Feb 24, 2013 | By: A Woman

Reactions as a window of Opportunity for self Intimacy - Day 310

A Window of OpportunitiesI realized today a fascinating thing about reactions as Judgement and Blame - what we judge about the other was always there meaning - their behaviour never changed or their thought patterns are always the same but only when we perceive that their behaviour or thought pattern may Harm us in any way whatsoever we then react to it Judgement, Blame, Resentment and so on.

 

Like for example, let's say that you work in a 2 floor office where your colleagues and you are divided to 2 floors. You are all in a way responsible for certain projects but each has their own responsibility. As long as you don't see what they do, there won't be any thoughts/backchats running around in your mind however, the moment you become aware of their doing, and you perceive that what they do would harm you in a way, you'll then develop backchats about them and judge/blame them within and as your mind.

 

So even though these people behaved/acted the same previous to your awareness of that, you only started to judge and blame them when you became aware of it and only because you perceived that their behaviour is unacceptable and may cause harm to you or others which compromised your self interest, you reacted.

 

In this scenario, the Reaction is what actually Compromised not only you but also your peers because if you noticed a point that require correction but instead of effectively directing it and come to a point of correction, you reacted to it and the problem persists.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to judge another when I Perceive through my own Physical eyes that they are doing something that is not acceptable according to the set of Norms that I've Encrypted within and as myself, set of norms that I've installed and lived as, in separation from myself without any consideration or regards to the validity of these Norms that I've accepted and allowed blindly as myself.

 

Within this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that what I judge is that which I 'Feel' that would threaten my Self Interest, because otherwise, if I would have seen a point that is not best for all, I would have been directing it within self trust and stability but the fact that I've reacted in judgement and/or Blame indicate a point within and as myself that I overlooked and haven't sort out yet.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the pattern or the point that I judged in another, was something that didn't quantimaly manifested but was always there only now, I became 'aware' of it because it interfere with my self interest which then thus, activated a personality system within and as myself through which I accepted and allowed myself to react instead of Direct and Correct.

 

In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that reacting to such point/pattern instead of directing them indicate that I've accepted and allowed my own process of compromised application as well as the Process of another because I haven't realize that as long as I accept and allow myself to react instead of clearing myself from these Energies,  stand in stability and clarity and assist and support the other to see one's participation of that which is not standing in alignment to what is best for all, I've accepted and allowed myself to compromise not only myself within my initial reaction but also the other as I've not stood as an example and as a pillar of support.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to question why is it that I only react to what I'm aware of while the point was always there regardless my awareness of its existence and within that, how is it that I've accepted and allowed myself to react to knowledge and information in terms of, reacting to what I became aware of instead of standing in stability in ever moment of breath? In this, how is it that I've accepted and allowed myself to change my entire behaviour through reactions to new pieces of Information that I've either heard/read/seen and thus, why it is that something outside of myself moves me and my entire expression?

 

I commit myself to further investigate the point of reactions as a design as I now see, realize and understand that there much more to it than what meets the eyes.

 

I commit myself to when and as I see myself reacting, to flag the point and use this window of opportunity to get to know myself more, to be able to transcend such points wherein nothing separated from me would move and change me but rather I stand as the directive principle in every moment of each breath.

 

I commit myself to investigate why it is that I've accepted and allowed myself to react to knowledge and information in terms of, reacting to what I became aware of instead of standing in stability in ever moment of breath? In this, how is it that I've accepted and allowed myself to change my entire behaviour through reactions to new pieces of Information that I've either heard/read/seen and thus, why it is that something outside of myself moves me and my entire expression?

Nov 20, 2012 | By: A Woman

Please feel Sorry for me - Day 220

 

 

This is a continuation to:

 

 

Stay, And I Will Love Thee by Ken WongFor the purpose of context, suggest reading these posts above prior to reading the post below, if you haven’t already. Here I will be walking the 'I don't have TIME' Character - Reaction Dimension - Practical support with Self Forgiveness and Self Commitments.

 

Reactions Dimension:

* Jealousy

* Frustration

* Irritation

* Anger

* Judgment and Self Judgment

* Impatient

* Self Pity

* Depression

* Anxiety

* Stress

 

 

 

 

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Self Pity

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want, need and desire others to feel sorry for me within the context of the ' I don't have time' character, as a manipulation tactic to stipulate others to assist me with the task I must do, instead of being direct, see what needs to be done, what I can do within the space/time consideration and accordingly, if I see in self honesty that I require additional support - I simply ask. In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to react either positively or Negatively to the  feedback of whether or not one can assist with additional support in walking a specific task that must be walked wherein, if the person would agree, I would be happy and if the person would disagree, I would again feel sorry for myself and be nasty and resentful towards the other being instead of - what ever the feedback of the other person may be, I stand stable within and as myself and direct the moment according to the feedback, breath by breath.

 

Thus, I commit myself to assess in self honesty, whether or not I require additional support in walking a specific task. When and as I ask for additional support, I make sure that whatever the feedback may be, nothing within me moves as I trust myself that I would sort the point in one way or another independently of a specific feedback. And thus, may the feedback be 'Ok, I can assist' or 'sorry, can't assist here', I breath, I make sure that I clear within and as myself, that no pictures of comparison comes within and as me, that there is no hidden resentment, judgement or spite whether the being cannot assist. All that has changed is  additional piece of information that I would utilized in making the next Move as self movement within and as a clear and stable decision.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for me because I have so many things to do and I don't get things done, not seeing, realizing and understanding that if I would to stop, Breathe, and walk with and as my physical, I might have get to everything in a practical and effective way however, when spending time in my mind, in feeling sorry for myself, all I do is waste the time that I could have utilize to the best of my abilities.

In this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to project in my mind, to all the things I would like to get to and accordingly assess what is possible and not possible to walk within a space/time consideration and thus, to not accept and allow myself to feel sorry for myself for not being able to do all that I would like to do and to instead, I commit myself to utilize such moments, in a practical and supportive way where I would assess all the points and prioritize them according to what would support me and the group the most and accordingly, make a decision, so absolutely, in leaving no back door for self pity and sorrow as I understand why I'm here, who I am and what are my responsibilities within my understanding of who I am.

 

///I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for myself when accessing the 'I don't have Time' character and perpetuate the point through sharing with others all the things I must do during the day so that they could also feel sorry for me and perhaps volunteer to support, not seeing, realizing and understanding that that which I walk, I walk for ME, as the Decision of who I am as an expression of myself and that it is my point to walk because I simply able to and that any emotions like feeling sorry for myself is unacceptable.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to investigate and realize the design of self pity where one would access self pity, to justify for oneself why one is right in being stressed, frustrated, irritated and so on and within that, what one is really desiring for, is recognition from others, to validate one's self sorrow so that one, wouldn't have to face one's creation of self pity/sorrow but rather remain enslaved to one's creation of one's mind with no actual self awareness movement in assisting and supporting self to see, realize and understand what one had accepted and allowed oneself to participate with, in separation of self and accordingly, walk one's self correction into changing self from Mind movement to Self Movement in any given moment.

Thus, I commit myself to SHOW that accepting and allowing self pity, is to prepare the way before self to fall as one is accepting and allowing self defeat, self limitations and self victimization instead of taking a moment to investigate and see what self had accepted and allowed self to be and become in separation of self, as how self had defined self within self pity and to, take a breath in, take a breath out, place oneself back in one's physical body, release self from the pre-CONceived ideas self had defined self as and accordingly, in self honesty and self responsibility, immediately correct and change.