From Dependency to Independency - Day 439

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be dependent on another to direct points 'for' me instead of expanding myself by seeing, observing and learning how to effectively direct points, through the example of another. In this, I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to realize that by creating a dependency on another to direct points 'for' me, I am limiting myself in the belief that I'm Inferior and unable to effectively direct points myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not Trust myself for being able to effectively direct specific points and thus, believed that I'm dependent on another to direct specific points 'for' me and within the distrust of myself, I haven't allowed myself to expand myself, to expand the way I look at things, expand the way I observe people, situations and events and accordingly, develop a direct seeing of what is here and how to effectively direct that which is here as an expression of myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to within the belief of not being able to direct a specific situation with another human being, to in fact physically live this belief of myself as my living application which within that, I would accept and allow myself to build up and accumulate energy as emotions such as frustration, resentment, anger and judgment towards the being without realizing that I must first direct these points within myself to ensure that when I look again at the points, I see what is really physically presented here and accordingly, effectively direct the points if/when the point still require direction.

 

I commit myself to when and as I see a point that require direction, to first turn the point back to myself and direct within myself any and all sort of reactions I have towards the point. Then, to unconditionally place myself in the shoes of another and assess whether the point still require direction and if so - direct when the moments present itself.

 

I commit myself to NOT accept and allow myself to limit myself within the belief that I'm not able to effectively direct a point because I realize that within the belief of not being able to direct specific point, I'm giving my power to my mind where I would start accumulating and build up all sort of energetic reactions, which creates a smoke screen from which I'm literally unable to see what is really here, what requires direction and what would be the best approach to/when directing a specific point.
 

I commit myself to no longer accept and allow myself to depend on another to direct points 'for' me but to instead slowly but surely develop direct seeing skills through which I would allow myself to direct points within myself and my environment as an expression of who I am within the principle of 'what is best for all'. I realized that creating dependency towards another to direct points 'for' me is a limitation of myself as I haven't given me the opportunity to face the point myself, investigate who I am in relation to the point ,what can I learn from it so that I could also stand as a point of direction when/if the moment requires direction.

 

Please also listen to – Independence - 2013 - The Future of Consciousness - Part 33

Controlling the moment through with unresolved point from the past - Day 420

Have you ever experienced a friction with a close friend or a family member wherein, you tried to get your way, they didn't agree with you and so, with your attempt to control the moment, you started bringing moments from the past, moments that are taint with blame and anger towards the friend/family member,  so that they would now feel guilty and so, agree with you?

 

Yes, this happened to all of us isn't it?

 

What we are actually doing is using Manipulation to Control the desirable outcome by generating guilt within the other so that they would change their mind and agree with what we are proposing. The thing is that for us, it all looks valid, it all make sense from the perspective of we were right in the past and we are right now though what is not see, realize and understood is the energy reactions from which we bring the past here, from the starting point of making the other feel guilty so that we can get what we want.

 

So, here is another example of how we direct a moment within the starting point of control, using all sort of energy tactics to get the desirable outcome without stopping for a moment and looking at all the dimensions, relationships are involved in this moment of time. We are so consumed by what we want that we are not able to effectively direct ourselves and/or our relationships with others .

 

Now, within the example above where we bring past moments here, in the attempt of getting things our way - what this implies is that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to accumulate resentment, blame, anger and so forth without effectively direct these points within ourselves and/or our physical reality. It is like, when things happened, we abdicate our responsibility to effectively solve problems and when a similar moments arrives, we use the past moment for our "advantage" so to speak without realizing that we got ourselves into a time loop wherein, we didn't solve the problem in the past, the problem occur again and now, within a reaction, we are trying to plaster our way out without again, taking responsibility to direct ourselves and/or our environment.

 

Keeping moments in our minds, without directing points that needs to be directed is not cool as we are accepting and allowing mediocrity to be part of our lives, let problems re-manifest, because for some reason, we were not able to stand and direct the moment. The resentment, anger or anything else that comes up - it is not towards the other, it is towards ourselves for missing in the past a window of opportunity to take responsibility and direct ourselves and/or our physical reality. 

 

So, when a point comes up in your environment where you see that you are able to effectively propose a solution and/or take responsibility for the point - do so; otherwise, let it unconditionally go so that in the future, you won't use that moment to control a new moment to achieve your desirable result. This practically means, moving from reactions to solutions wherein we assist and support ourselves to live moment by moment as a living principle. If you see that you bring a moment from the past to make a point - it is a red flag for yourself - it is a window of seeing what you have missed in the past, how you can correct the point and within that also, accept the consequences you have brought upon yourself by not directing yourself effectively in the past. This means, that you are no longer trying to control the consequences but instead from this point onward, investigating how you can prevent the point from reoccurring, take responsibility and direct yourself/environment by and through living principles of that which is best for all.

Are we Really Hearing Each Other? Day - 321

Yesterday I had a conversation with a being that brought up some old Memories of what they Perceived I communicated with them in the past and how from that moment, they developed inside themselves a friction and conflict in relation to what they perceived that I was saying. Then, for the first time, I've Realized that we have never actually communicated with each other from the perspective of, we would always "Hear" what the other is saying from our own personality/character system that we have previously created in our mind and this personality/character is the entity that is "Hearing" and Interpreting what the other is saying according to what would serve the best the Character/Personality so that one would not question the existent of one's personality/character but instead, accept and allow the Personality/character as it is and would doom oneself to a life of misery and resentment towards others that apparently said some stuff that one had reacted to. One would repeat this conversation in one's mind and alter it until at some stage, one would be absolutely sure that these are the words the one had spoken to the extent of validating one's misinterpreted out of context words that the other had originally spoken.

 

I later on further looked at this point and I've realized that everything that I have heard throughout my life, was never an actual 'Here-ing' because I was always hearing what the other is saying from the Personalities/Characters I've accepted and allowed as the existent of myself with absolute surety that this is who I am.

This is a concerning point: the realization that we have never communicated with each other. This also explains why there is so much friction and conflict within human beings, either suppressed or expressed - we never hear anything pass our Mind and will always hear what we want to hear to maintain and sustain our personality/character we play a role in, within the belief that it is who we are.

 

This also made me realize why it is so important to not share with another our thought processes before we are clear and stable within ourselves within the trust that we would be able to direct the outflows as backchat that may emerged within another. It is imperative to first walk a point for ourselves, as ourselves, and stand with absolute clarity before we share a point with another that may influence, prolong and compromise the process they are walking.

 

I've seen that I've been sharing points that I was not yet clear within myself because I felt obligated to share it within the concept of "Friendships". Meaning, I believed that I must share myself with my friend so that they would know that I'm working with the point and that I'm doing something to sort it out and I will prove it to them by sharing with them what I've seen thus far without a real and practical direction within self responsibility for each and every dimension this one point consist of and exists as. I believed that the other won't be influenced by the points that I'm sharing if I say to them: "it's not about you, it's me, you have nothing to do with it, you are just the trigger point that activated the point within myself so don't take it personally".

I believed that this is what Friendship is all about - that one must share oneself without taking into consideration what the sharing my cause in the other human's mind because my self interest within it was to be 'Good' within the other's eyes, within a perceived presented responsibility I've taken on by working with the point of friction and conflict without realizing that sharing at this stage is an act of abdication of self responsibility as I've not placed myself in the shoes of another and how would the other process the information I'm throwing at them within their Mind personality/characterization.

 

So, this point was a good wake up call for me to redefine the nature of Friendship that I've created as a Script I must live as, as if how I've structured what friendship is within my mind is the Moral code I must follow and cherish. It was also a good reminder for myself to always walk in the shoes of another when and as speaking with another to assess and measure in absolute awareness if I'm able to direct each point that would result and/or manifest from me sharing information/realizations and within this, where the other being is in their process and whether or not what I'm sharing would be destructive or supportive in a given moment.

 

Thus, I commit myself to place a guard in front of my mind, a guard that is me as the directive principle in breath by breath Awareness, before I speak. In this, I commit myself to walk my process of correction to understand my own mind and thus, understanding others' mind within the realization that all minds are exactly the same in its functioning with the only change of the outfit each one dresses their Personalities/characters. Within this, I commit myself to place myself in the other shoes, to see who they are for real within all the relationships one have with one's mind and accordingly, assess the words I speak and express myself in a way that would be the best support possible. I see, realize and understand that unless that is applied in absolute self honesty, the words I speak can be destructive and poisoned and thus, would be the words that would compromise another, when and as the words I speak are the words I speak to fulfil my self interest desire to achieve a specific outcome that would serve me as a character I've accepted and allowed as me instead of standing as an expression of myself, as a living words, applied in every moment of breath. 

The Importance of Physical Communication - Day 148

How much time are we spending talking with other beings in our environment, in our mind, without actually communicating with them?

How many times are we assume we know what the other being is going through, what the other being would answer if we ask the being a question?

How many times we become totally frustrated and angry at another being because we assume the being did something without taking us into consideration?

How many times we perform an entire conversation with another being in our mind, playing out all the possibilities within ourselves with the being, inside our mind, so when we actually communicate with the being, we forget to walk a time line with the being because as far as we concern, the conversation was already done (in our mind) and the being is full aware of our string of thoughts.

It is clear to me now, how and why I fucked so many relationships in my life by not communicating with the being, accumulate resentment towards the being through my assumption that I know what the being has done, through the assumption that the being didn't take me into consideration and thus, the being is not supporting me in anyway whatsoever.

For example: a week ago, I was talking with a friend and I made them aware of the situation that I'm in. I didn't tell them: "Hey, would you like to come and see me, I would like to be in your company right now, enjoy ourselves together". I was expecting the other being to see that I would like to meet them without me having to directly communicate it with the being.

The day after, this being called me and told me about their day before, who they met, how was the experience and so on. Within me, I started to be angry and frustrated because I assumed that where this being were was some place close to where I've been and the being should have come to see me. I was angry at this being for giving more value to what they have decided to be and whom they have decided to be with, and not for a moment considered where I am within my process and accordingly, came to see me.

When I saw the anger, resentment and frustration coming up, I stopped, turned the point back to myself and saw what I was accepting and allowing. What I've seen was that I was the one who didn't communicate the point of wanting to hang out together with the other being, I didn't let them be aware of where I am within my process and what would assist and support me in that moment. And so, I let it go.

On our next discussion, this point came up when the being shared another story about their experience the day I expected them to see me and yet, they had other plans which they had attendant to. This time, I was here, breathing, hearing what the being is sharing with me. I then told this being the process I've walked through regarding this point of me being frustrated about them and how I assisted and supported myself to turn the point back to myself and see what I've accepted and allowed myself to participate with and the important of physical communication rather than Mind communication.

The funny thing was that I was not aware of a little single point - the place they were attending to was not even close to where I was as my initially trigger point of: I can't believe they have been so close to where I live and didn't come and see me. It was only me, making the assumption that I know where the being was and from that initial assumption, I created a scenario in my mind of not being considerate.

The point is - we cannot expect others to know what we are going through without communicating about it. we cannot expect others to do something for us if we didn't directly asked them to; obviously, the next dimension one must look at regarding expectation is that nothing should move within and as oneself if the other being would not comply to that which we ask them to. What ever their answer may be, we stand, clear, stable. If any movement, backchat, reaction comes up - it is not about anyone but self and self must take the responsibility to turn the point back to self and investigate how and why self has separated self from self through accessing one's mind.

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