losing yourself in the realm of validation - Day 471

This is a blog response to the blog - Day 528: The Value of Validation by Activist's Journey To Life.

 

"In terms of my own experience, I can now clearly see the benefit of my dad's actions. He only would congratulate me or tell me he was proud when I actually accomplished something of note, and even that was not so much a "congratulations" but more of an acknowledgement of what I had done and a reflective discussion. I have to almost laugh - it is so difficult to describe how he would talk to you and bring such clarity to a point - I feel as though my words fall short. He encouraged me to do what I enjoyed simply because I enjoyed it. He did not tell me how great I was for actually doing something, he would just say "cool" - while on the other hand every other adult kept pushing the "well done" button, not realizing that in doing so they were creating the perfect habitat for dependance to take hold, which causes the desire for validation to outweigh the point of self expression."

 

A few years ago, I was playing with my nephew when he was 2 years old or less. We were outside at my parent's house and the kid started to investigate the miracle of a 'ball'. Lol - miracle because for children, an object that they are exposed to for the first time, it is like magic - they are exploring its component, shape, abilities and every moment is an experience that is so profound. So - when he realize that he can also use his legs and kick the ball, I was standing there, and without awareness of what it is that I'm actually doing, I accessed an automated preprogramming where I cheered him up every time he kicked the ball - you know - high pitch sounds of "wow"; "well done"; "you are the best" combined with lots of positive energies.

 

I didn't realize  at that moment that I am busy conditioning his expression within his relationship to the ball whereas, I created a moment for him to 'please me' when he kicked the ball because every time he kicked the ball, I cheered him up and if I said nothing, he just stood there, looking at me, expecting to receive a form of feedback,  rather than simply enjoying expressing himself with a ball and exploring what the ball and he can do with/for each other. So long as I participated with giving him positive feedback, he played with the ball. The moment I stopped, he stopped.

 

The interesting thing was that when he explored other things like for instance, gardening, he did it for hours - just him and the tools, the grass, the flowers, the leafs, the water - he was stoppable - really was enjoying himself with all that was there. No one gave him positive or negative feedback in relation to gardening and so, he could continue doing it for hours because the experience was not  conditioned to any sort of energy - it was simply a physical expression of enjoyment in exploring, discovering gardening/nature.

 

When I read the blog: "The Value of Validation" - the memory above came up - it was the first time that I realized how adults are influencing the child's self-expression by conditioning the expression to be dependent on specific result; Result as in how the adult reacts to a specific expression that the child is experiencing - If the adult react positively, the child will continue expressing themselves in the same way so that they are able to be rewarded with the positive feedback (Energy) they received from the adult and if the adult react negatively, the child will either stop expressing themselves completely (Suppressing themselves) or the child will express themselves secretly.

 

The thing is - as we grow up, we conditioned ourselves to other peoples' feedback and we completely disregard the questions - who am I in relation to this experience? Am I enjoying myself? Am I doing it for others? Am I doing it to please the adult? Am I doing it for myself? Why am I doing it? Is it supporting me and/or others?

 

I was one of these kids that wanted to make my parents proud in all ways possible and therefore, I would only do what I perceived to make them feel proud of me; and the things that would make them feel ashamed of me - I kept in secret or suppressed. Within that, I lost myself from the perspective of neglecting or avoiding doing the things I enjoyed doing as an expression of myself, and doing only that which will give me a reward, a positive feedback. It is quite sad when I look at this point - losing yourself in the realm of validation and positive feedback - I guess we were all conditioned to behave that way - we mold ourselves according to the feedback we get from our environment, generation after generation. I wonder how much more we can give to each other if we would change that preconditioning inside ourselves and support the children to discover self expression, self enjoyment. 

 

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Art work: Dottie Gleason

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I Hope for a better world - Day 346

What makes us follow another? Whether that someone be our parents, our loved ones, our government,  activists movements, spiritual movements - what is it that makes us follow these people/movements without questioning our involvement within it all, the practicality of it, the possible outcomes and consequences?

 

Obviously I was interested to investigate why is it that the Equal Money Movement isn't as "attractive" as spiritual and/or activists movements even though the Equal Money System movement is aiming for the most compassionate manifestation that could be possibly achieved in this world on a practical and physical level.

 

When I asked the question, I saw the answer - it comes down to HOPE. You see, with the activists and/or Spiritual movement, what bring people together is the promise of HOPE that everything will be ok, everything will be fine if we only scream loud enough. With the activists movements it would be screaming in the streets and doing as much protests as possible and with the Spirituals, it would be screaming (in an enlightened way) some Mantras and Prayer. I've done that to. I tried the activists way when the Israeli prime minister was murder in a peace assembly and therefore, new elections were conducted. I stood in the streets for hours trying to convince people to continue the way towards peace. Obviously, it failed and the right wing took the lead. A decay after I screamed for help from my spiritual guide. I screamed for some guideness and nothing came by. In both scenarios I prayed and screamed for a better world in the hope that a change will somewhat happen and we could all live happily ever after. In both Scenarios, I hoped without questioning whether the things that I hoped for can be practically manifest. All I did was Hoping without any physical grounds.

 

The Equal Money system however, cannot be walked by Hoped but as an individual self realization that we must take our power back to ourselves and apply our responsibility that is granted to us at birth, as life.

This is why not many people are willing to even investigate the foundation of the Equal Money System as that would imply that one would take self responsibility and actually consider another and not just one's own pursuit of happiness of oneself and one's loved ones.

 

So really - if you are looking for Hope, the Equal Money System is not for you but note that you received an opportunity to do something with your life that is best for all and yet, you dismissed this opportunity because you were not willing to give up your self interest and transform your interest to an interest of Life that is best for all. If you claim that you are a good hearted and that you care about people and yet, you do not invest the time to investigate the Equal Money Movement than I know that you know that your claim is false.

At the end of your day, you have to live with yourself knowing that you could have stand up for a change in this world that is worthwhile, a change that would ensure the dignity and integrity of all living being including yourself. At the end of the day, it is your integrity that is on the line and again, you are the one who decide.

 

So - I would suggest to stop HOPING and instead start MOVING on a physical level because in every moment you Hope for a better world, someone is dying from hunger, malnutrition, diseases, etc. and while Hope won't bring to them food on their table, Equal Money System would. The longer we wait with establishing a world system that protect and honour life, the more people continue to suffer. So what would you decide?

 

The Dark Side of Humans and Charities - Exposing Problems continued - Day 297

This is a continuation to:

Charity and Activism - why is it a Capitalistic Scheme - Part 1 - Day 294

Charities - Exposing the Problems - Day 295

Charities - Exposing the Problems - Continues - Day 296

 

I remember, as a child in junior-high school, we were asked to go one day after school and raise funds for a cancer charity organization. We went in groups of 2, door to door, and asked people to donate their money. in return, we gave them a ticket/invoice and our goal was to finish the ticket/invoice booklet. My friend and I were very good at it and we were able to finish the booklet in a few hours. That made us wonder whether or not we should do it more often however, we wanted to get paid for our work.

 

We found an organization that promoted themselves in the 'workers are needed' ads in the newspaper - they promoted that they would send us a booklet via the post mail and we will raise the funds on our own time. Then, we were supposed to take half of what we were able to get from people donating their money to Charity and keep it for ourselves and send half of the money to the 'organization'.

 

Now understand, we were about 15 years old, very much naïve and if it weren't for our sisters that explained to us what we are about to do, we would have go along with it.

My Sister explained to me that I'm dealing with a fraud and that if it was real charity organization, they wouldn't give us half of the money that should have reached those that are in need. She told me that the people that donate their money for charity, believes that they are donating their money to charity and not half of it to me. I could see the common sense in her words and decided to drop it but the temptation was big, I could have made 100$ in a matter of a few hours and for a kid that age, 100$ is a lot of spending money, specifically when at that time, I was working in the afternoons in a small shop and earned that sum of money in 9 working days.

 

However, how many kids do not have older sister or parents to explain to them what these kind of Frauds are all about? How many organizations like these, exploit the innocence of a child to make a fortune? How many people are being fooled into the belief that their Donation is for a good cause but at the end, their monies are going into the pockets of thieves?

 

This story of mine is happening on a small scale however, fortunately, it also happening on a bigger scale all the time. Here are some articles and videos that I collected:

Charity Fraud - Wikipedia

Charity Scams Exposed - This short BBC interviews showing how easily it is to create  falsely Funds raising pockets and how it has been utilized in times of horrific crises to 'play' on human's heart.

September 11 charity schemes - This article discussing the many charities that started up after the September 11 attacks for the primary reason of individual profit.

New York woman accused in alleged Newtown charity scam - Nouel Alba is accused of using her Facebook account to solicit money from those wanting to donate to Connecticut mass shooting' families, claiming that the money was to be used for a "funeral fund," while she didn't used the monies for such purposes.

 

Honestly, there are much more information about Charity Schemes all over the internet - it is a huge business that can only be allowed within a society that is striving for one's survival to the extent of which one would do what ever it takes, no matter who gets hurt on the way, to have the monies necessary to support themselves and their family. Yes, some takes it to the extreme of becoming Rich from such schemes however, we cannot blame them as it is our collective accepted and allowed  of a world system that forces such behaviour within the principle of Survival.

 

It seems that charities benefits mostly the 'wrong' people meaning - it never reach in full capacity to those who are really in need and if anything, it mostly benefit those who were in power positions in the first place.

Obviously, Within the Equal Money Capitalism that will all change fundamentally as you could see in the Solutions that we will present for the Problem of Charities. 

Blind Spot and Deceiving Hope - Day 255

I always stopped myself from watching Documentary because I believed that I must have knowledge and information regarding the History of Humanity which I perceived myself as lacking and incapable of learning and educate myself and thus, the Common Belief I held within myself was that watching Documentaries that are based on History is useless because I won't get it anyway.

 

It was very recently that I pushed through the point of resistance and gave myself the Gift of Real Time Education where I could not only start adding the dots in the History of Humanity but also Learn much of the unspoken truth regarding the world and within that, our lack of responsibility that had lead to this manifestation that we call 'Life on Earth'. Only through the Education Process I set forth for myself I had realized that unless we correct what we have created, we stand no chance.

 

Like me, there are Million or even Billion people that have access to Real Education that is shared unconditionally. Real Education meaning - not the Education one learns at School. This type of education is very much Bias, Limited and of the interest of those who are in Power. But again, you don't have to believe what I say here - investigate it for yourself - Is anything you learn at school was in any way Practical? Did it open your horizons in becoming an effective human being in this world?

Within that context, I suggest watching the 'COLLEGE CONSPIRACY' Documentary that explain in detail the forces that are involved in the current Education System and why the Education System around the world is inadequate, impractical and in no way exists to Empower, Grow and Expand the Human Race.

 

Last week I watched the Documentary - Blind Spot which for a moment, activated some Fears and Reactions within me however, when I stepped out of my Pre-Program design of Reacting instead of Preventing, I've realized that literally, if we continue reacting and only sort out the manifested consequences only after it had already manifested to a point of no return, there is no way we will make it. Well, maybe we will, but the generation to come will most certainly not.

 

The reason why we would not investigate the Problems in this world and move to a Principle of Prevention instead of Reaction is due to the inherent Design of HOPE that is based on our Self Interest.

It’s funny that We all say that we care for our children, that our children are our world and yet, we do nothing to ensure that the Life of our children and their Children will be Certain, safe and sound from the perspective stabilizing Earth for them to have a world to live in. It is interesting that we believe that our Love for our children comes down to making sure that their life will be safe as long as WE live; as long as we Exists; because really, what we want to define ourselves as is in being Good and Loving Parents and yet, we do not care at all, about the Lives of our grandchildren and their grandchildren because the Physical Evidence is showing that we are living in a doomed Earth that unless we do something NOW to make sure Earth will Remain, there would be no Life on Earth on 90-200 years from now.

 

Hope is a very interesting Design - it is a BLIND Participation within and on this Earth, within the comfortable belief that everything will be fine and we will find a solution for what ever may occur because thus far, we survived like this - there was always a person or a group of beings that found a solution for the problem that had manifested and this is why, I'm not worried about anything, it will be ok. But will it be ok? What if there is a point where there is no way of fixing the problem any more? What if our grandchildren will live in a world where fossil fuel will be no more, where food would not be accessible, maintained and sustained? Why is it that despite of the Scientific evidence that we are heading towards the end of Fossil Fuel in this world, where alternative energies will not sustain and be enough to our current life style, we sit and do nothing? Hoping and depending on Science to bring the solution while Science already came and presented solutions - but we do not want to listen to the solution in the nature of Prevention because that would mean that we will have to change - change the way we consume, the way we live, the way we enjoy our life style.

 

Hope is also sound like Help - Always hoping for someone or something to Help us, to Save us. When will we realize that no one is coming to save us? that there is no God, no UFO coming to save earth, No Jesus coming of a cloud, no Superman that will save the day - it is only us - we cannot continue ruin this earth and expect others to clean our mess - there is also no money in this world that would buy the renewal of earth because Money is one of the main reasons for the destruction of earth in the first place.

 

I suggest reading my blog: From Reaction to Prevention and Obviously, watch the documentaries listed below to have a better understanding of what really goes on underneath our nose. We have the solution, but we require you to stand with because unless you move, unless you change, no movement or change is possible. We are in this together, we have to take ourselves out of it together. There isn't any other way.

 

"Remember the world system is just a system of relationships. It only exists because of all the participants; so if the participants change, the world changes – it’s really simplistic. It’s an individual thing. That’s why one by one, everyone must change, to bring about a change in the world. And you have to actually change the relationships, so that the relationships that are formed between people, animals, environment, is what is best for all Life – really simplistic". Bernard Poolman

 

Blind Spot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=pByCxG2dIWY

 

War on Democracy

http://johnpilger.com/videos/the-war-on-democracy

The Century of the Self: Part 1- Happiness Machines

http://youtu.be/prTarrgvkjo

 

The Power Principle

http://metanoia-films.org/the-power-principle/

 

The Trap

http://archive.org/details/AdamCurtis_TheTrap

 

Psywar

http://metanoia-films.org/psywar/ 

 

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

http://metanoia-films.org/human-resources/

 

Investigate Equal Money System - It is time to MOVE - Will you dare to care for REAL?

Delusion of Ego or Self Movement? Process Support - Day 242

"When we are in situations wherein we begin participating in patterns, such as self judgement, we must make the decision to stop - an actual self will to stop the thoughts as they come up - because in truth we know exactly where these thoughts will take us, we know exactly where they are going and it is only out of a perverse sense of curiosity that we continue allowing ourselves to be consumed by the thoughts. We are within these situations all that stand in our way, because we have the tendency to allow ourselves to sink into a state of self pity and helplessness, convincing ourselves that we are unable to stop these experiences.

 

Self forgiveness and writing assists one to see where and how these patterns exist within us, though we must also make the choice to no longer participate in the patterns - we must stop - self forgiveness is useless without practically walking corrections.

 

The thoughts will continue to come up, the patterns will continue to emerge - our application and honouring of our choice must stand firm throughout the layers of our patterns. If we make a mistake, we must be willing to forgive ourselves, learn from it and continue walking our chosen path - beating ourselves up is counter productive. Consistency is key - practice, practice, practice." Cerise Poolman

 

Cerise wrote this statement on the Desteni Forum as a reply in the thread - Re: Why am I worried about my appearance SO much? which is why I have decided to write this blog as this is the KEY point each of us must realized and understand because otherwise, no REAL and constant change within and as ourselves and this world.

 

This morning, I woke up after 4 hours of sleep and the last thing I wanted to do was working in the garden. I preferred going back to sleep because I 'felt' really tired. I also had a white bunny in my pocket that I could use to excuse myself from working today - on Wednesdays, I'm not supposed to work in the Garden because my Schedule is tight up and it was decide to I support myself by not taking the extra responsibility such as working in the garden for 2 hours. However, I've seen within and as myself that specifically today, I was able to work because unlike every other Wednesday, today isn't so hectic. So I was sitting on the veranda, drinking my Coffee and felt so tired and I was about to remind everyone that today I'm not working on the garden. As I was sitting and drinking my coffee, I decided that I'm not accepting and allowing myself to excuse myself when it is not necessary but the feeling of the body being so tired was overwhelming. I then started to calculate: maybe I won't work today and I will work on Saturday for an extra 2 hours? Maybe if I won't say to anyone that my schedule isn't that hectic today, they won't expect me to work on Saturday for extra 2 hours. And as I participated in my back chat, the Atlanteans interview came up in my mind where it was suggested to when waking up, to simply align ourselves with the body and say: "Body, Let's wake up and start a new day".

So I did, I told my body, Let's do this, let's wake up, snap out of the Experience. And Guess what- I immediately woke up, went to work and started my day.

 

Now, there were many other times where I've applied this point within and as myself, but nothing changed, because what I haven't realized before was that unless I, in absolute self honesty decide to change, I won't change and the only 'change' would be me feeding more energy into and as my mind with Excuses, Justification which are nothing but a distraction to in fact change.

 

Thus the point being - One must make the absolute decision within and as oneself, in self honesty. I'm not saying it would be easy, I'm saying it is possible as I've proven that to myself many times before. One would see, that in this moments of change, Resistance exists within and as us, it is almost like a constant friction and conflict where we would bounce between thoughts, justify ourselves, and contradict our justification, find another excuse, and contradict it and we will loop this points until we would find the excuse/justification that would set us up to give in within and as ourselves and make the decision to not change.

 

So, with the Waking up point that I shared above, if one would apply it for oneself, one would find that it is quite an easy point to take on because in essence, we have nothing to lose but one or two more hours of sleep. However, the challenges is to Stop, stand as the Directive Principle in moments where our entire self definition is at stake, where our Ego is so extensive that we feel that if we would to let it go, a part of us would be lost, diminished, gone because we haven't realized that this part of us that is now about to get lost, is not who we really are, it is a pre-program design that we have imprinted and stored within and as ourselves which upon that design, created multiple personalities as our self definition that we believed to be ourselves.

 

Thus, one must develop a real and absolute self movement, self directiveness and self will because otherwise, we would keep on looping on and on with no actual change. We would then judge ourselves for not making much progress in our processes and go into self defeat mode which would be harder to step out of. Obviously, judging ourselves for not making any substantial progress is also a distraction from getting to the core/source/origin point and absolutely apply and correct ourselves, in self honesty, self will and self Power.

 

So - Let's do it because really, we don't have anything to lose but to win the greatest gift of all - Life that is REAL, trustworthy and respectful.