Cannot Conceptualize Equality in our Minds - Day 164

This is a continuation to:

Walking Breath by Breath - Part 1 - Day 160

Walking Breath by Breath - Part 2 - Day 161

Spiritualizing beings that had Died - Day 162

OMG, I'm so Special because I'm speaking with the Dead - Day 163

 

 

It is interesting how we give beings power to the extent of complete abdication of self responsibility.  I mean, even with Bernard, I have to keep reminding myself that he is not special and that he is a physical living human beings with no special powers and that the fact of the matter is that what he does, how he speaks how he lives is what is NORMAL however, I couldn't even conceptualized that NORMAL is living by a principle of that which is best for all.

 

I mean none of us have a real understanding of what best for all implies because if we had, we would not accept and allow ourselves to exists within and as an abusive world that is based on one's self interest for one's survival. Seriously, when I come to look at it - How we live, how we act, how we speak, react etc. that is not NORMAL - that is all automated reactions and behaviours that we have accepted and allowed within and as ourselves and it goes to the extent of which we cannot even SEE that Living Here, within and as the physical is what is NORMAL.

 

Like for example, we have defined as normal that our country doesn't really take care of us, that if one doesn't have enough money to invest in their children's education, it's ok, that's life - some times it good and some time it is not.  We have defined as normal that if something goes wrong in the other side of the world, we won't do anything about it because it isn't really bothering us, it is not our loved ones that we need to take care of. we have defined as normal that when  someone needs a kidney implant but one doesn't have money for a kidney, then one would die. We have accepted as normal that when one do not have medical insurance, one wouldn't get medical aid.

 

However, what IS normal is when everyone will get medical aid because they need it. everyone will have food on their table, because they need it. if I go across the world and require assistance or a place to sleep in, it is normal that someone will assisting me and take care of me because they can do that. That is NORMAL - life within equality and oneness is NORMAL but we cannot conceptualized that within our minds because our mind doesn't stand in alignment to that which is best for all. In that, there is nothing magical and powerful in walking as an example of that which is best for all, there is nothing special or powerful in walking with no Mind to direct and move oneself but rather, breath by breath self movement, Here, within and as the physical.

 

An interview that had assisted and supported me in opening up this point further is the Crucifixion of Jesus - Part 10.

 

What I'm seeing is that I've created throughout my life and specifically the spiritual phase was creating symbolism as to who one is when one is stepping out of one's mind. and in that, through spiritualizing the symbolism instead of walking and living as myself, that which was shown to me, I have perpetuated my own separation and in that, have not given myself the permission to practically and physically stand as equal to and one with the being that is walking as an example but instead, had gave the being powers (which I now see as simply Normal living application) within my own desire to be that special when I would also, walk and be done with my process. And being done with my process is also a point of separation because my process will not end until everyone's processes would end. But within me, all I had cared about is my own process, my own glorification within this process as the glorification that I've assign to Sunette and Bernard, my grandfather, Kryon, Guides and Angles.

 

Within this, instead of walking that which is shown to me, in very detailed and specific words, I've created them as something so MORE than me that if I could get it myself, I would be that MORE and others would see me as MORE and everything is but my own desire to always feel and be special; Instead of Practically, slow myself down, Hear and be Here, see their words within and as me and stand as them, equal, in simplicity so that I could assist and support myself and in that, assist and support others and in that - get the fuck out of our minds so that we could start LIVING within and as this physical reality, as NORMALS :-)

 

Ok, More to come.. Tomorrow.

OMG, I'm so Special because I'm speaking with the Dead - Day 163

This is a continuation to:

Walking Breath by Breath - Part 1 - Day 160

Walking Breath by Breath - Part 2 - Day 161

Spiritualizing beings that had Died - Day 162

 

When I had the dream about my grandfather lying on the metal silver bed, with a light on top of him, and I knew that he was dead - what was behind the dream? Where did I ever heard about such experience before, and if I haven't and it had emerged in the very first time, what was this dream all about? What did this dream gave me throughout my life in relationship with my grandfather in particular and all my relationships as a whole? And how through this dream, I've characterized myself from that moment onward?

 

Usually, when we do not understand something, we try to make sense out of it. the only way I could make sense of this dream was as if I've given a sign, as if my connection with my grandfather was so great that I was sensitive enough to see him in his death. In other words - I was special in my ability to sense my grandfather, I had a special relationship with my grandfather, more than anyone else, I was the special one, I was the chosen one, I was the favourite one.

 

Now, this happened long before 1998, when the connection between earth and the dimension was still open and fucking with one's life could easily be done. For more information regarding the relationship between heaven and earth before and after 1998 and before and after the Portal had opened, I suggest listening to the Journeys into the Afterlife interview series. 

What I have not realized until recently, that the dream was preprogrammed so that I could characterize myself as special through having the sensitive abilities which through that, I could remain special in my own mind, in my secret mind and create an illusionary reality that would be the foundation of my later on spiritual phase where I was almost completely fucked up if I wouldn't came across Desteni and could hear their message.

 

So obviously, I didn't question the nature of the Dream and my After Death Communication with my Dead grandfather because this entire experience gave me power, made me feel so absolute Special in comparison to my other family members, which was in essence, my own self interest desire for an experience that I could validate myself through, that I could worthy myself through and that I could empower myself through; only what I haven't realized was that the only thing that I've validated was my own mind, my own pre-programming that I've accepted and allowed myself to exists within and as.

 

Before and after my grandfather had died, the primary experience was of me being special, cared for and loved unconditionally by him and during my life, I was seeking and looking for these character that would give me the experience of being special, cared for and Loved unconditionally. Clearly, I wasn't able to conceptualized that I am here, regardless how others are giving me, or I never conceptualized what does it even means unconditional love and unconditional taken cared for in an existential level.

Later on, I have found more dead to spiritualize in my mind and that was when I became spiritual. All those powers and attributes that I've assign to them, in separation of me, gave me the experience of being so special. I mean, as a spiritual person, hearing the positive words in books and scripts was so powerful and divine. I was really sure that the divine Masters, Guides and Angles are taking care of me, are resonating through me, healing me and others as me. And again, I obviously didn't question their existence because why should I? I was so special in my own mind. it was the only place I could feel so loved and special and having a propose. What is interesting to see now is the polarized realities that I had within my mind where in for moments, I felt so divine and powerful and in the next moment, I was so alone, useless, unworthy and depressed. That in it self raise the question - are we all Schizophrenic in the context of the polarity that we exists as within and as our mind? the only difference is that l Schizophrenic beings had externalized their mind into words while the Normal being have the ability to filter their minds when it comes to speaking.

 

Ok, so I will continue tomorrow with How I've spiritualized Living beings in comparison to the dead. Thanks for reading.