The cultural society norms character - Self Forgiveness Day 98

This is a continuation to

The Chameleon Character in my Movie of my Life - Day 97

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have taken for granted the belief that I must embody specific emotions and feeling within and as myself according to how the society and culture expect me to behave and thus, when and as I've not stood within the embodiment of a specific emotion/feeling when for example, someone questioned/challenged my stance, I access guilt for not being possessed by the expected emotion/feeling without realizing that in that moment of guilt, I've in fact have become possessed through accessing another dimension of and as Guilt and thus, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to stand as who I am, with no energy movement within and as myself and instead, have allowed the Chameleon Character that I've created and become to dictate the script I would play, the script that would ensure my position within and as the my society/culture so that I would please my environment and could maintain the 'peace' within the relationship.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not realize how instantaneously, me, as the Chameleon character, chooses the character that will suit the best outcome in any given moment wherein when my stance within the cultural and society norms is challenged, I would choose the best character that will automatically speak on my behalf so that I wouldn't create a friction within my environment. In this, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that the core/source/reason for why I haven't accepted and allowed myself to stand up as LIFE that is best for all is because of fear of losing my desires as I believed that only those in my culture/society can fulfil these desires because they have done so in the past and thus, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand the co-dependency relationships that I've created with my environment wherein, we are dependent on each other to remain in character and fulfil each other desires, despite of the fact that it is only our desires, in self interest that we are providing for each other and there is no equal and one care and consideration to everything and everyone in this world and so, if one will step out of character, the relationship will fall and our desires wouldn't be able to be fulfilled any longer. 

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have place Value within and as the culture and society norms that I grow up with and have thus, embodiment those values within and as my flesh to be guided and directed in any given moment and accordingly, have automated my behaviour through creating myself as the chameleon character, as a data bank of all the character that I can use to be able to maintain/sustain myself as my culture/social norms dictate me and would be able to fit in, be accepted, validated and rewarded.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear stepping out of the culture and society norms character because I know that when stepping out of character, friction would defiantly manifest and within that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to walk in self trust in every moment of every breath in absolute self honesty, trusting that I would keep walking no matter what may manifest and thus, I let go of the fear of friction as there is nothing to be afraid of - Friction will manifest as it is part of the change as the challenge that each one will face and unless I stand in the face of the challenge and friction, I will know one thing - I had a chance to step out of my character and stand up as Life that is best for all, and yet, I haven't as I've allowed myself as the fear character to direct, control, enslave and dictate me who and what I am as the culture and society norms that I've accepted as myself and within that, I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to realize that unless I step out of character, I am useless as I have all that one needs for one self change - I've got the tools, I've got the support and it is me who decide whether I stand or fall and it would be me who would have to explain why and how I've allowed myself to fall with all the support that I have had throughout my Life.

 

I forgive myself that I've NOT accepted and allowed myself to see the relationship between remaining in the culture/society norms character and the self interest desire for a reward as an experience because according to my past experience, when and as I stood within the cultural/society norms, I got a reward for my behaviour and thus, have decided to remain in character so that I could maintain and sustain my rewards.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to compromise and diminish myself through taking other people cultural and society norms characters personally and have thus, wear specific suits and changed my colours to sustain the peace within our relationships because I feared facing friction and within that, I haven't seen, realized and understood that so long as I accept and allow them to remain in their characters, I'm supporting their characters and thus, support their acceptance and allowance of the diminishment and compromise of themselves as characters because I wasn't willing to step out of my character and stand as a pillar of support within and as myself and within and as others as myself.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to change my colours around people which I've stored memories about and haven't allowed myself to express myself as who I am, despite of me knowing exactly what is that I'm accepting and allowing when and as I allow myself to change my colours and submit to the cultural/society character and I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to stand in self honesty as who I am, in every given moment due to fears of being mocked, judged, not accepted and validated because there was a desire that I didn't allow myself to give up yet, a desire for a self interest reward that I may get if I play along with the game, a desire that I didn't allow myself to let go because I haven't established self trust within and as myself that I will stand in the face of what ever my come, and walk the same as yesterday today and tomorrow, that I will stand and find a practical solution for what ever that may come because there is ALWAYS a solution if I dare myself to see it because the solution is Me, as what I decide ME to be and become, what I will accept and what I won't - it is always me who decides.

 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must explain and justify why I've changed to those who are still in character and within the fear of sharing myself as what I've walked, I in fact made sure that I won't step out of character and as such, will have nothing to explain and the truth is that I have not changed in fact because if I had, I would stand no matter what.