Starting Over - A Failure or an Opportunity? - Day 232

So in a way, I'm starting my process again or to be more specific, aligning my starting point in why am I walking this path and who I am within the decision because, as long as 'Self' as a Starting point, within the principle of what is best for all, isn't absolute clear, I would keep bouncing back and forth with no actual and substantial change.

 

I have changed my starting point of walking process many times before. It is more in the context of aligning the starting point when I saw something about myself that I haven't seen before and accordingly, after introspection, I see the adjustments and alignments that must be done within my application.

In the beginning, I used to access self judgement within the back chat - "I have failed", "I fell", "everything that I've walked thus far is a waste" but after awhile, I had realized that it is actually a cool thing because After all, it is a process of change and it is a process of becoming honest with ourselves and as we walk, more dimensions are coming up and within that, we expand our level of awareness and our self honesty and we align ourselves, stand up and continue walking. The only Real fall is when I had accepted and allowed myself to judge myself and chastise myself.

 

This is where I am now - in a point of Re-alignment; meaning - even though I CONvinced myself that I'm walking this process for myself, the 'myself' was still in the context of self interest wherein, I used my Process to define myself as more, within a life purpose that I've created within and as my mind, within an idea that I have to get somewhere, that I must achieve a goal, that what I do must result with an outcome where I could look back in my elderly days and be proud at what I've accomplish in my life.

 

What I had to realize was that 'Myself' is not the 'Myself' in Self Interest that must be the Starting point. 'Myself', is not only me, in an isolated world that exists only within my mind. 'Myself', consists of and Exists as everything that is here within interdependent relationships that encompass everything and everyone and thus, walking this process 'for and as Myself', is not to satisfied 'Myself' as the Mind within the Definitions that I could define myself as but rather, walking it as and for Myself as the Realization that 'Myself' is Equal to and One as everything that is here and as such, I walk this process for and as everything that is here, in Equality, because this is My Self Responsibility simply because I am part of everything that is here. After all - What is best for all is also best for me.

 

So, the points that I would be focusing now is looking and investigating the definition that I've programmed myself within and as in how I have lost myself, as Who I am, as Real Life on Earth in an ocean of Definition, in separation of myself.

It is to walk to a point of Nothingness, that nothing externally or Internally would determine who I am. That nothing would move me, unless I move myself. What would happen after? we shell see, it is not important nor relevant at this stage because if it was known I wouldn't be able to trust it because if it was known, it would imply that it was pre-programmed and that I wasn't the directive principle within the programming.