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This is a continuation to:
Menstruation Pains as an Excuse to Indulge- Day 175
Menstruation Pains as an Excuse to Indulge - Self Forgiveness - Day 176
Menstruation Pains as an Excuse to Indulge - Self Commitments - Day 177
So, I'm continuing investigating the dimensions within the relationship of Headache and Menstruation that I've created within and as myself throughout my life and through walking the dimensions/layers within it, I've realized a fascinating point that I would like to share about today.
Also, for more context, I suggest listening to:
Reptilians - Thought and Thinking - a Deliberate Creation of Control - Part 105
Reptilians - Thinking as Mind vs. Direct Seeing with the Physical - Part 106
When working with Pain that was created through an accumulation of memories, thoughts, ideas, opinions etc. that were accepted and allowed within one's life, one would see the various dimensions/layers of the mind that slowly but surely starts to reveal themselves once a layer was removed in self honesty.
Within that context, I was looking at the differences between Meditation and quieting the mind and Stopping the mind as an act of self movement/direction, in self honesty.
What I've realized yesterday for myself was why and how when silencing the mind through meditation, it's nothing but creating another dimension, a silent dimension within one's mind with no actual and practical change but rather, suppressing the thought/pattern/personality/character and creating a new one and that is in comparison to stopping the mind as an act of self directiveness/movement that one is practically and physically taking responsibility for.
When I was practicing Spirituality and within that, practicing Meditation to silent my mind, I never investigated the nature of the thoughts, the consequences of suppressing the thought but simply ignored them as if they never existed however, within that, never seen, realized and understood the physical manifestation of the thoughts in and as the human physical body and how through suppressing the thought by ignoring it, we do not in fact removing/deleting the thought from the flesh of the body and therefor, there is no physical and practical change within oneself and one's living application but rather, one would create and manifest another character that would be so powerful in terms of suppressing other characters that self had accepted and allowed self to create and participate within and as oneself and one's world.
Stopping the mind, as a practical, physical self directive principle, is a total different story.
For a moment I was confused within and as myself regarding - what is the difference between deleting a thought and suppressing a thought through Meditation. For me, the outcome seems to be the same - in both cases, the thought is gone. What I haven't considered within this question, as mentioning previously is the physical aspect as well as self responsibility within and as the act of removing/deleting a thought vs. suppressing a thought in meditation.
The point that I was specifically looking at was - how can I make sure that I have actually deleted the thought and I'm not fucking with myself again, as I've done as a spiritual. How can I make sure that I in fact stopped the thought and not just ignore/suppress it. the answer that I've found within and as myself was very simplistic - if the thought comes back again, I haven't in fact deleted it and what I've actually done was creating another dimension and manifested a time loop that would take me to the same place where I've initially wasn't honest with myself when stopping the thought. Also - a practical consideration is to - not accept and allow self to simply delete the thought, create a character of: I'm so good, I deleted the thought yopi hey hey hey and rather, take a moment and write the point out, see whether something was missed and whether one is in fact clear and stable within one self.
So, Deleting a thought or removing a memory through Self Forgiveness doesn't end there. All we have done was removing ONE layer, ONE dimension and ONE thought so that we could assist and support ourselves in seeing the next layer/dimension/thought so that we can walk through the next layer/dimension/thought and so on.
While in meditation, let's say that I've ignored the thought. Cool, for a moment the thought isn't there. What now? A time loop. Why?? Because I could have stand up and take responsibility for myself in investigating the nature of the thought and the core point of my acceptance and allowance of its existence and within that, walking through the layers of the mind and clear the entire network that is interconnected with this one thought.
And so, in terms of practicality - once removing one thought, we can either take a moment and investigate the next layer/dimension or if in our day to day living responsibility we don't have this moment of self investigating, we can simply wait until the next layer would reveal itself within the realization that we cannot avoid it, it will appear/reveal itself in some way or another and in that realization, we are honest with ourselves within the starting point of: ok, I've seen one layer, there are much more that I've not yet seen, I'm making the commitment that when and as the moment is here and the next layer/dimension would reveal itself, I will stand up, take responsibility and sort it out. And so, we do not create another dimension of: "I walked and am now done with the point" but instead, being humble with and as ourselves, walking one step at a time, one breath at a time, and how long it will take is irrelevant as we trust ourselves to clear ourselves in every single breath, trough consistent application that is trustworthy, exactly as Breath is consistent and trustworthy.
So, back to the Menstruation and Pain - another dimension/layer/though/memory had reveal itself through the emergence of headache which "forced" me to have a look again what memory I haven't yet looked at within the relationship of headache and Menstruation.
Want to know what it was?? Stay tuned till tomorrow.
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