Apr 9, 2013 | By: A Woman

Cultural inherited Behaviour - overview - Day 344

Yesterday I had an interesting communication with another 2 Israeli people; From my perspective, the 3 of us were simply sitting together for a cup of coffee, enjoying each other and having a discussion. After a while, another person came out from their room and suggested us to pay attention to how we communicate with one another because it sound to them as if we are fighting. They suggested we have a Speaking Stick where only the person who holds the stick may talk. The person explained that from what they could hear - we kept on interrupting one another and constantly were speaking without taking a moment to actually hear what the other is saying.


Our first reaction was: "well, this is the Israeli way of communication"; for a moment, I was satisfied, it was the Israeli way, we do respect each other, don't tell me how I should speak. Please!? In that moment, I haven't stood up and transformed my Reaction into a point of correction and thus I missed a moment of opportunity to Quantify my process by moving myself to a point of immediate correction.


So, when I investigated the point for myself, I've seen a few interesting points:

The way I was taught to communicate with another, which became an integral part of how I express myself, is disrespectful dishonourable. Using the excuse that this is how we used to communicate doesn't make it ok or valid but rather perpetuate the absurdity of us justifying why it is ok to be disrespectful to another through our inherited cultural behaviour in communication.

The second point I was looking at is how easy it is to continue harming and abusing another when it's part of the way we have always accepted and allowed our behaviour to be. Because here, we all had a window to take a moment and investigate the point within ourselves and yet, we immediate moved to the justification that the way we speak with another is valid because this is how we always do things in our culture.


It is that easy to justify our cultural behaviour without taking a moment and apply the principles:

Investigate all things and keep that which is best for all and do unto another that which you would have liked to be done unto you and if we cannot even stop for a moment and look at a simple point such as our communications skills with another, it is not a surprise that we have never stopped to investigate the relationship between our cultures and the harm/abuse that is accepted and allowed in this world and justified with: "it was always like that".


So - from the smallest to the greatest, let's walk one point at a time. In my next blog I will be walking the specifics of how to transform our communication to a communication that is honourable and respectful where we actually hear one another and process the information that is shared , where we are actually considering what the other is saying and not just fighting with another for our own limitations. Then, we will have a look at the relationships between the cultural designs and the world system as a whole.


Rebecca Dalmas said...

Cool Maya,
Yes, we talk "at" others more often than listening, and then we concentrate on " this or that" point, redirecting to mis-direct at times, pointing out - and expecting acknowledgement in terms of accumulated knowledge and information without taking the time to be within understanding of what is here in totality.
So, most conversation is in relation to our own self interests in a bubble, inconsiderate of here, the physical, the world and what it means that we are within a supportive physical symbiotic relation to this earth where what we are determines what exists, here.
The corporate voice is one and the same as our own self interested behaviors.

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