Jan 23, 2016 | By: A Woman

That moment when you hear people talking about you (Part 3) - Day 540

Continuing with the previous blog where I discussed my relationship to overhearing someone talking about me and what revealed during the process of investigating this points inside of myself. As well as the solutions and practical support I've been practicing in real time moments. For context, please read: That moment when you hear people talking about you (Part 1) - Day 538 and That moment when you hear people talking about you (Part 2) - Day 539

In this blog post I will talk about the importance of stopping the reactions towards another person talking about you and how to take the 'negative' experience and transform it to a life lesson from which you can empower yourself from.

Let's go to the basics for a moment. To the root cause of why we are so afraid of one another; why it is so easy to break someone's trust; Why we fear being vulnerable with each other; why we react to judgement so much.

Here, I ask you all to move yourself for just a moment, to a point of self-honesty when answering the following questions:
Is it because of us knowing how deep the rabbit hole goes? Meaning, seeing the extent of our own mind and how nasty we can be when no one is hearing/watching our thoughts? And because we know how Negative and judgemental we can be in our mind, we assume that other people's mind is exactly the same. Isn't that so?

So yes, sometimes our nasty thoughts are coming into the open in a form of gossiping about someone with another. And Yes, it is not valid.. These thoughts need to be removed by each one of us taking personal responsibility for our own mind. But we are not yet there as it is a process that needs to be walked by each one of us individually.

What took me so long to realize was that when someone gossip about you, it is another in their mind that is speaking.. It is not the deep real being that is so suppressed underneath the layers of their mind. Meaning, it is not personal towards you, it is just the mind being exposed to the extent of its automated programming that they need to step out from with awareness. But the question is - how to create that awareness? Can they be aware if you are reacting to them instead of supporting them to be aware of that one singular point they have exposed themselves to?

As long as we react to the words spoken in that moment, we are not just compromising our relationship with others, we also compromise the other's personal growth, and the chance that they have to change in that real time moment when we stand up and show them what they have accepted and allowed, in giving their mind absolute control over their physical reality.

It is time we move ourselves from reaction to solutions.. To walk out of the reaction and to stand up as the solution. I know it is easy said than done but we have to start practicing this skill. Like with any skill, mistakes are going to be made and we are going to stumble until we find our feet within it all but eventually we would; I am ready to start. Are you?


Art: Gossiping by Itzchak Tarkay


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